Hollow Souls [Aina/Cala]

She'd blink as the hollow started to tickle and hold her chin, causing the woman to smile and give a soft blush. It was nice of him to hold her like that, but the words which followed brought a more puzzled expression to her face. Trading truths for truths always tended to lead to the opening of people's souls. And when that person opens themselves to another, the possibilities of hearts connecting and better understanding one another can occur.

So, the woman listened as he explained that he was indeed a monster and would continue to be one as he drained the world's hopelessness. All the while, the innocence of the other Cala was of separate mind and body in a way. Hence, tasting the vibrant nature of Aina's soul quelled these beast-like urges, if only so little. But, even with that influence, they would continue to be beasts, and it was up to Aina to decide if she could accept having such a thing in this life as they fell deeper into their pursuits.

After taking time to remain silent, the woman was lost in thought. Yet, when she felt ready, Aina mustered the strength to speak.

"I don't want to lose either of you, so perhaps we will see how far this can really go before it becomes a problem. I don't want to think too far for the future, as nothing good ever lasts forever. I do not know if it will bring either of us misery, but I still feel safe around you, and you are always welcome around me. Even if have the instincts of a beast, there is still something in you worth holding on to and I don't want to lose that."

With a nod, the woman continued.

"So let's not worry about the future and live in the present. I need time to think, and we both are tired."

With her smile returning, Aina remained silent for a moment before a passing thought turned around.

"But, tell me, is the other Cala capable of interacting on this level? What is his take on all of this? Do you both share the same memories, or is it when one is suppressed, the other is unaware? I'm curious..."

As Aina thought over how she would respond, weighing and measuring the words provided, Cala would adjust their position with slow motions. Not wanting to disrupt Aina's comfort Cala instead laid themselves down in the bed, cradling Aina securely, and let her rest against their body. Allowing her head to rest on their shoulder or lap, or the pillow beside them if she wished, though their arms stayed securely around her as Aina replied. Due to their nature Cala's physical reactions were all but blank, not even a slow blink or movement of the eyes to betray their thoughts, but their Pesquisa, their spiritual senses, roamed and studied Aina especially intently in her face. Giving her just as much attention as they would if they possessed functioning eyes.

They nodded, softly, at Aina's decision to simply see how things progressed, and it was not until they asked after their other self that Cala finally reacted in a physically observable manner. Lips pursing, jaw setting, their head turned away in a purely aesthetic gesture as they gathered the words.

"We are..... intrinsically linked, but serve differing purposes, they are to speak, to disarm and deceive. We are to hunt, to formulate, strategize and fight..... they are..... closer to human... we are closer to....... a Hollow. As such..... it is generally true that when I assume control it is because we are thrust into a situation that is too.... severe for our other self. Usually this is the prospect of combat. As such, they are generally willingly unaware of what it is we do in this time, but it is not impossible to catch glimpses if we wish. "

Taking a moment to think on this, they would pause only briefly before continuing.

"As we are the one to handle combat we are always somewhat aware when our other self assumes control, in such a case as we are needed to react. Sharing our memories completely is possible, and often what I provide so that our other self is as intrinsically aware of safety as we would be if we were one person and our other self does not hide the context for combat from me, as doing so reduces our chances of survival..... but..... it is possible for us to hide things from the other, completely if we desire, as while one of our selves slumbers within it is faced with the mystery that dwells within. Unraveling the knot of our confused soul so as to better understand our nature. Our other selve's... take.... on all of this thus far does not exist. From the moment we engaged the Hollow before they have been unaware, as I fear if they were their own timidity would bleed through in this situation and you would find me much more.... unstable."

Their expression flattening Cala would give a slow nod to Aina, as if adding a question via only the motion before asking.

" Forgive us, does this confuse you? It would not surprise us, as even we are far from completely aware as to why our spirit functions in this manner......"

There was a great comfort when the two were in bed together. It was nice to have someone next to her that understood and wanted to protect her. It made a great part of Aina feel safe as this world felt terrifying at times, and it was better to have a person at her side than to go at things alone. So, the woman caressed the chin of Cala as a warm smile eased across her lips. She wanted to savor this moment before things got more serious, so her plum aura kept the two of them warm, and she forgot all about whatever tiredness, exhaustion, or pain she had; even if, in reality, it was still there and she could feel it with her movements.

"This feels nice, Cala. I feel safe with you."

She'd closed her eyes for a moment and let out a soft hum as she was content. But such moments couldn't last forever. So, she just rested there and listened to him explain the structure of their body. To her understanding, the innocent, human-looking Cala was meant to lure in people and get their defenses lowered. While at the same time, the Cala she saw was the aggressor and wanted to take out any threat that came their way. That meant they were linked, even if they didn't fully understand why. They could share memories and feelings but ultimately hide them from each other: different auras, yet the same soul in Aina's eyes.

So, after having time to think and contemplate this whole situation, the woman's eyes opened once more as her gaze looked up at Cala. Finally, after a few moments of silence, she nodded and spoke.

"I completely understand what you are saying. You act as the aggressor, while Cala is bait. The two of you are connected but can hide things from the other if you wish. It's a lot to take in, but interesting nonetheless."

She'd then tap his chest with her other hand before continuing.

"Where do you go from here, however? Do you want to keep this up forever? Being a hollow is hard, but do you think your power can be used to help others? What do you see yourself as?"

Cala's mind wandered, Aina's closeness not visibly distracting them all too much, and their masked visage turned to simply stare across the room as Aina made herself comfortable. Their own expression was rather blank in comparison to Aina's smile and the only real indication they enjoyed the closeness was the very minute shift they did to put themselves closer to Aina. Their bodies pressing together in a way that let Cala's gentle, ashen coldness mingle and dance with Aina's low, warm heat. Like two scents or sensations swirling together to form something.... new.

Cala's jaw tensed just a tiny bit as Aina caressed their chin, and with a slow motion Cala raised their left hand to grip Aina's wrist. For a moment, perhaps, it would seem they were displeased with the act. Their grip was rather firm and they did nothing to show they enjoyed the sensation of touch, it was only after a long pause that Cala's grip loosened enough for their hand to slide along Aina's wrist gently. Caressing the soft skin gently before they silently took Aina's hand. They had spoken.... much, saying more to her in one night than they had ever said to anyone in the history of their existence. Deep within, a thought hidden from their visible features and their other self, this Cala was... scared. Ever so slightly worrying over just how easy a pair of wide, purple eyes could pry them apart. How easily a gentle touch and kind soul could tame a savage monster. How easily she..... could make them feel.

Listening to Aina's understanding made theme exhale a breathe in a slow, even breathe they had not even realized they had been holding. In the same moment of their exhale their hand that had taken Aina's moved, unbidden by conscious thought, to entangle their fingers with hers. Cool, slightly rough ashen skin mingling with Aina's own as Cala felt her touch their chest. The thick fabric of their robes soft and pliable to the touch and the questions that followed that innocuous motion made Cala hum a single, solitary note. They stayed silent once Aina was done speaking for a long time, a VERY long time, more than a minute of nothing but silence and a vague stare at the far wall. No indication Cala had even heard her, or was alive, save for their gentle breathing and soft strokes their thumb now made over the back of Aina's hand. Their skin just rough enough from wielding their blade to tingle along her skin in gentle strokes, and with a suddenness that was almost alarming they would halt the stroking of their thumb and respond.

"From here..... From here we go backwards, I think. That recent event that tore at time nearly destroyed us, we nearly devoured ourselves, in a way but I simply do not possess the answers to explain further. Answers lie there, answers we need, but to acquire them we require power. As for what we see ourselves as......"

For the tiniest, briefest of moments, genuine frustration creased Cala's mouth..... but it vanished just as quickly and they continued in a soft, gentle tone.

"... conflicted. The temptation remains, always, to both aid this world in taking it's Loss away... and sewing more with which to gorge ourselves to greater heights.... "

Cala would turn their head not quite enough to look at Aina, but enough to turn their body on it's side and then, in one fluid motion, grip Aina's other hand and roll over her. Pinning both of Aina's hands down to the bed now, and hovering over her in a manner that was unmistakably, startling and abruptly threatening Cala's claws would dig softly into Aina's hands while holding them. Not quite piercing the skin as they bore their small fangs just a bit, not in a true growl or primal motion, but more opening their maw as if to display them to her. Whether Aina recognized it as the truly hollow threat it was was unknown to Cala, as their masked visage gazed at her intently. Cala's senses bearing down heavily on Aina as they inhaled sharply. Their voice now a hiss as they whispered.

"..... to break the hearts and souls of others, to see them wallow in the deepest depths they may be broken to, such that they weep for death..... a fate of which the innocent are particularly susceptible......"

As they neared the end of their sentence their voice softened, their grip following, and Cala moved their hands to either side of Aina's head, their right hand moving to gently brush the hair from her face as they murmured.

"Sleep. We will not harm you, much as we may be conflicted to do so, we understand that our agreement is more valuable than what we could take from you now."

Leaning down Cala softly touched their cool, soft lips to Aina's forehead, before moving to their knees, tucking her in against them once more, and beginning to hum her a quiet, albeit somewhat toneless, lullaby.

There was a void expression on the face of Cala as he seemed lost in thought to the outsider, but Aina could feel some affection in his soul. It made her feel at ease even as he began to grip her firmly. To the perception of the woman? This form of the hollow wasn't used to expressing outward emotion, but from his words prior, she assumed he would not harm her and trusted him at that moment.

Not saying a word, she just watched and noticed how it softened as he seemed intent on caressing her skin as Cala let out soft exhales of breath. Feeling this close of a connection with someone was foreign to Aina in her current life, so her heartbeat was thumping faster as there were some butterflies in her stomach. The silence could be awkward, but she just let it be.

After that long stretch of quiet passed, a few blinks of the eye came as the hardness of Cala's body moved over her hand as he held his thumb over her. The contrast between her softness and his rigidness was a rather potent feeling between the two.

However, as he began talking, that thought was thrown back into her mind. From his explanation, there were no answers to be found as they were intended to go backward. They were conflicted as they needed more power as a void of temptation existed within them.

Aina was in shock at this point, but she didn't feel anything as she felt relatively small. Then, tensing up, she suddenly shifted as he turned them both over and pinned her hand down, digging his claw into her hand. At that moment, she wasn't sure if it was a threat, but more uncertainty and fear came across her as the woman whimpered quietly. Not sure what she had gotten into, the words of him wanting to break souls and see the innocent wallow in them terrified the woman.

However, she couldn't speak as her eyes blinked slowly, and a bit of sweat dripped off her face.

And then -- silence.

She just shook quietly before sheepishly looking up at Cala.

"I....can't sleep after that."

With anxiety in her voice, Aina gulped softly before moving ahead.

"I....don't want you to hurt people who don't deserve that. But I can't ignore that; you might get killed or hurt me..."

Sadness and fear were all that she felt, but she knew she had to confront it here and now.

"...do you plan to hurt me or others for this goal in the future? I....don't want that if so."

Internally, though their features betrayed no disappointment, no excitement, or anything in-between as they gently held onto Aina to say that she had reacted exactly how Cala suspected she would prior to pinning her was entirely correct. Though, at the same moment, it had been the expected response, and yet the entirely opposite one hoped for in it's understanding. Thus it was that Cala was their most expressive for a mere moment, ashen lips turning downward, with a sort of sorrow etched not in it's intensity, but in it's stark contrast to the lack of emotion prior.

Cala waited for Aina to say all that they felt was necessary, and nodded a single time, before moving themselves from the bed, Gently sliding away from Aina back onto their their feet before walking around to the foot of the bed. Their head sightlessly lingered on random spaces throughout the room, but their senses remained on her, wholly and completely. With a low, thudding step Cala came to stop and regarded Aina passively. Their mask gazed a foot or so above her head, their posture lax, but their voice cutting in it's low intensity as they spoke.

"Tell us, from what we have said, why did we do what we did a moment ago?"

Truthfully, Cala's heart hurt a small bit. They could not, they would not, give Aina the answer. They could not expose themselves, not this self, like their other. Centuries of survival and savagery made that impossible but perhaps, just perhaps, a small hint, a bit of restraint and focus, could guide her to the answer. At their sides Cala's hands nearly clenched, the claws digging into their own skin without remorse, nearly piercing their own skin as they waited for her answer. Could Aina reach the desired conclusion? Did she care to? To Cala, at least in the moment, the answers seemed one and the same, all that was left was to receive it from her.

Aina, despite her uncertainty, didn't want Cala to get up. But, she let him do as he pleased. The woman was still trying to get her witts together. So, despite her anxious state, the woman relaxed by taking slow breaths in and out. Of course, it slowed her heartbeat, but this whole situation was still out of her element.

Hence, for the time being, her plum eyes watched Cala and listened to his words. He wanted her to reflect and replay those words that he spoke. At that time, she did just that and closed her eyes. Replaying the scene in her mind, there was a bit about him wanting to play a role in taking the loss of this world away. So, after that line played in her mind a few times, the woman opened her eyes again.

Not speaking just yet, she timidly got up, forcing herself to her feet as she held his wrist to comfort him. She didn't know his thoughts at the moment, but she knew what it was like to be seen as a monster and just wanted to assure him she wasn't leaving just yet.

Eyes looking back up to him, she continued.

"You said you wanted to protect us above all else. You've done well to do that today. But more importantly, what stands out now is that you said you wanted to remove the loss of this world. So, I think there is a chance for you to do good, am I right?"

She'd continue to rub it softly, giving him that softness his rigid skin and heart needed. But, of course, she had no clue what he was going through, so she just stumbled through the dark and cusped his chin.

"I'm...sorry I got scared. I didn't mean to hurt you..."

Watching Aina move was almost like watching the scenes of a beautiful play and it was likely she did not at all realize how alluring she was. A brief pondering of what exactly a mixture of attraction and aggression of their stripe could be called came to Cala's mind. What did one call the simultaneous desire to devour someone in body and soul, while also desiring to hold them oh so gently? They did not get the opportunity to answer their internal question as Aina's hand found their wrist and Cala continued to stare above her head. Never quite giving her the recognition of angling what would have been his eyes down to hers, not even as she spoke.

Her answer and, perhaps even more-so, her apology lacerated their heart like razor-wire. Stinging, euphoric emotions twinging onto a heart so unused to them as to make them ambrosia, the barest drop of disappointment, highlighted by the tiniest spark of hope. Cala... winced, a barely perceptible thing, but the motion was there nonetheless. Their throat working in a slow, controlled swallowing motion they would inhale gently, before slowly nodding. Much as they may have desired to take this answer as enough, much as they may have desired to return to the comfort of moments before.... they could not.

No.

Instead it was all this Cala could do to gently raise the arm Aina had grabbed the wrist of, use their free hand to pull her hand away, and hold it ever so gently. Their mind a warzone as they both simultaneously wished to drop her hand, and to hold it all night, the two sides of just this version of themselves conflicted even as their fingers curled softly around her hand and settled on a simple agreement. It was beyond odd, they thought, to disagree with themselves as one part of a being with already disparate selves, but this was important enough to warrant it. Thus Cala softly laced their fingers with Aina's and nodded, slowly, as if the speed of the action was indicating it was barely correct before they added.

"One more.... hint. Before that even.... the conversation in totality. Who we may harm, by your words and mine, and what we are."

Even that felt like too much, like something too close to the answer, like flying too close to the Sun or giving someone a blade with which to pierce their heart but.... it was all they could do. After they let their words hang in the air for a long, tense moment, only NOW, did Cala's chin tilt down so that the eyeholes, the inhuman mask, the monstrous visage, would meet Aina's beautiful plum eyes..... and wait.

There was something strange about him that Aina couldn't pinpoint as the hollow started to lose himself in thought. There was a conflict that had to be taking place within the mindscape of his consciousness, yet to this woman, there was still a softness to be found in him. If he really wanted, he could harm her greatly, yet he didn't. It is why she remained still as he moved his arm up and moved Aina's away, only to gently hold it as he began asking her to recall the conversation in its totality further.

Blinking a bit, the woman wasn't sure what to think at the moment. But she started thinking further backward and tried to understand what they both were. Both of them were creatures of loss, and the two of them may bring great harm to each other due to the nature of trusting others and taking on the risk of knowing another.

Remaining silent for a while longer, Aina nodded and tried to come to her own answer.

"From what I recall, we both are creatures of loss. We both have lost so much, yet we both stand afraid to hurt the other as having your life tangled with another inevitably brings pain. Yet, how you deal with it and move forward may decide how our future turns out."

Speaking calmly at this point, the woman hugged the male's waist and just spoke softly.

"I'm not sure if that is the answer you want to hear, but I've been trying to remember this conversation, and I know you won't hurt me intentionally, but the path you are on may bring harm my way. Yet, that is the risk of knowing another."

As Aina blinked and thought to herself Cala remained motionless, a stoic freeze-frame in time, stunned by a tiny wish, blazing eternal, in the cold heart of darkness their aspect had forged them in. As Aina spoke, for the smallest of moments, that tiny wish seemed to glimmer all the brighter, turning into the smallest ember of hope and she would be able to hear their breathe.... stop. Yet, as seemed all too common a trait in this world, Cala's hopes were raised.... only to be brought crashing back down into a sea of choking, dark, disappointment. Their breathing returning in only a handful of moments, and along with it, a fuzzy, cold aura of disappointment and failure. One thing becoming evidently clear as Aina extended her arms to embrace them at the waist, and Cala stepped away..... she had failed.

Her second answer, her soft words and attempted touch, once again nearly brought them back to the brink of hoping, but now... now Cala was numbed to it further than before. Now their breathe did not catch, their senses did not focus upon Aina as if she was their own personal star, none of it. Cala's senses would draw away from Aina, observing her now as if she were another Hollow, and yet even now they wished to snarl at her. To MAKE her understand, to tear THEMSELVES apart to show what truth they knew.... but they could not. It was not wholly their truth to show and what they could say to her now was so numbed by pain and disappointment Cala could only take another step away from her, and then another, no conscious thought seeming to carry them across the floor as they seemed almost.... scared of her now.

In a motion that made them seem all too similar to their other self Cala lowered their visage, pointing it at the ground, and shook their head. Their voice a low, almost hoarse croak tinged just ever so softly with a raspy undercurrent.

"No.....we do not struggle as you think now..... we.... desire to say more but.... you are a flame we fear we may immolate ourselves within....

It was sorrow beyond reason, and pain beyond imagining, that brought Cala to the point of mimicking their other self. Their arms briefly hugging their body in a comforting motion before they jerked their head away and strode to the window. Were Aina particularly attentive she would note a slight tremble to their hand as they opened it, their hand that pushed it open curling to a fist as they paused, tensed, and murmured.

"We are.... leaving. We cannot keep you safe and we cannot make you understand.... much as we wish you would.... much as we hoped you could...."