Sunshine's The Worst Medicine [Komugi, Igen]

Devastation, that was likely what would describe how she felt. Komugi wasn't going to pretend she felt any sensation of 'home' within the Seireitei, at least without her family here with her.

But the people here... The many faces and friendships she had, even looking upon the expanse behind white walls... She couldn't help but feel her heart sink. Was this really as well as they managed to defend the place? She almost dreaded hearing the inevitable casualty report; the only thing keeping her from working was the fact she'd probably be picked up and dragged off to bed again, at least up on the roof she had some time to contemplate... Even as the sun began baring down on her.

Slowly lying back, she'd look at those bright skies, squinting her eyes as she was poorly adapted to looking plainly at the daytime sky. Exhausted, but unwilling to sleep - after a few rounds of healing she was at least nimble enough to crawl out her window and get up here. She couldn't sleep, not without the realizing someone she once idolized as a hero, had been one of the orchestrators of the deaths of thousands haunting her mind.

She didn't know what to do, all she could think of was to give herself some punishment by resting in the unfiltered sun, for her own personal failure.. She couldn't even kill an invader, and hurt a comrade by mistake in the process of helping him. She had to do better, but right now she just wanted to feel as weak as the many who died, in their memory.

Her squinted eyes floated to the only mote of darkness shielding her from the sun's accursed glare, her brow scrunched up as her dazed state made sense of what her eyes caught,

"You're not Taro..." Her tone was a bit mopey, rasped from thirst as her small form would roll back into the light of the sun, "..Course not, Taro's not even here... He's stuck like everybody else in the World of the Living..."

She sniffed gently, her eyes burning with misery, "I don't wanna move, Gyakusuma-san... Not til my pain's even a bit measurable to everyone who's gone... Everyone that couldn't be saved.."

Her face scrunched with Ko's loud call for her to get back down, her claws in the grooves of the roof. Killer headache, she realized, sniffling at Igen's request.

"..The Eighth's barracks.." Her little voice rasped, "..Taro liked them a lot... How am I supposed to explain to em they're all messed up when he gets back..?"

Tears started beading in her squinted gaze, brows turned up to squeeze against each other in aching sadness, "He'll be crushed... He might just give up on his dream to be an architect some day... He wanted to help build our new home in the Seireitei when we could afford it..."

She couldn't hold it back anymore, "It's not fair...! It's not fair...! Why did this have to happen again..?!"

Words blubbered and degraded into pure sobbings, weakly wailing as the embarrassment of crying in front of someone else was greatly outweighed by the overwhelming sensation of the only betterment being utterly knocked out once again.