What Do You Fight For?[Hannah, Solomon]

Defeat was always a bitter pill to swallow. No matter how humble or prideful you were, suffering a defeat against what one considered a mortal enemy was the worst. Sickening. Detestable. Even after all this time, after all these battles, he remained unable to shift the tide of victory with his thunderous blade. Right before his very eyes, he witnessed his beloved rival suffer in a frozen prison at the hands of a merciless arrancar.

His mind replayed the scene, alternating between a state of consciousness in reality and dreaming of the horrific event which welcomed a nightmarish outcome. He was thoroughly outclassed in the face of such immense power, and what did he have to answer for his loss? Nothing. He hadn't even cleaved his blade through her statuesque frame. Slowly but surely, he wondered. What was he truly? Useless? Everyone seemed to be evolving past him, improving and elevating their talents. Yet, here he was. Confined to a hospital bed, staring aimlessly at the lights in the ceiling.

It was a struggle to move his tall frame. His body was still numb. Bruised. Wounded. He kept flashing back to those mocking hands that caressed his face, humiliating him for his inability to impact anything. Slamming his fist across the desk beside him, he rose up and leaned against the bed. Of course, the price of that bold act forced the numbing sensation to halt his body from acting any further, forcing him to rest against the bed. Defeatedly, he sighed, his sapphire gaze returned to the ceiling.

"Well that was mean" Hannah would state, stepping into Solomon's room. With a gentle gesture, the crack in the desk would fade away, and it would return to full form.

"Though, as a doctor I would advise you not to get up so early. Damaging things while they are still in the process of healing will just make the healing process even more arduous and long winded. It certainly doesn't help anyone for you to get up and start running around a few days before you should, or can. Doesn't help you, doesn't help me, doesn't help your nurse"

Hannah would have quite a stern voice to her. Supportive, but strict, and ready for disobedience.

"Oh... Hannah. It's you... Sorry about that."

Noting her presence, he apologized dryly as he leaned against the hospital bed. He hadn't really expected to see her so soon after they reunited, but time was a rather deceptive mistress, leading them to cross paths once more. Since he couldn't imagine a more welcomed presence, he didn't regard her with anything close to disobedience. No matter his own frustration, he held a great deal of respect and even admiration for the first woman he met in this city. Chuckling dejectedly, he turned his head to the woman fully.

"I suppose you aren't wrong there. Don't worry. That's about the extent of what I'll be able to do. I can hardly move my body being rolling around and moving my arms in bed. Enough about me, though. How have you been?"

Hannah would give Solomon a lidded stare. While her blindness meant a lot of emotion was lost in her eyes these days, one could still get the idea she was not super pleased with the way Solomon was dealing with himself right now.

"Better than you, apparently" she replied. "If you can barely handle standing up, then stop standing up. Being injured is something everyone goes through. Give it the time it deserves, or it will take the time it deserves"

"True. After all, I'm laying over here and your standing over there." He retorted with soft sarcasm evident in his tone. There was nothing malicious behind it. It was simply a humorous acknowledgment of his poor predicament. He truly wanted to adhere to her advice, but a myriad of crippling thoughts continued to deafen his better judgment.

Solomon generally desired to rise up from his bed and return to training himself to exhaustion, desperately striving to unearth some unique skill that could help him improve his overall repertoire. He wanted something. Anything. The body proved superior in the honesty of its condition, forcing Solomon to sigh in defeat as he shrugged his shoulders.

"Being injured sucks. Especially after suffering a humiliating, near-death defeat. Even so, you aren't wrong. I'll lay here even if it bothers me. Will you answer my question regarding how you are now that I am motionless?" He ventured languidly.

"I'm two hundred and something. You are twenty five. I've had a long time to learn how to get around my limitations. You are still young, and depressed. You still take every defeat as a loss, rather than an experience. Which, to be fair, isn't easy. When you are young like this, every loss is personal. Every victory is personal.

The next step in your progress is so close, you understandably have impatience getting there. It is so close, why is it taking so long? Here, I feel, there is a boon in the great gulf between this step and my next step. No matter how fast I run, it is still far away, so I might as well take my time. I'll get there eventually"

Hannah would spawn a Shakkaho, and then hover another hand over it and dissolve the orb into a cats cradle of energy, playing with it gently.

"But as for how I have been since we last met, much less adventurous than you. Life is blissfully without incident so far"

"Does youth truly matter concerning the bitter sting of defeat?"

Solomon furrowed his eyebrows at her words, respectfully accepting her advice in one aspect yet deflecting it entirely from his mind in another. Defeat was natural. No warrior unless, he was the strongest under heaven and earth itself, could lay claim to a life without a loss. It was inevitable. An immutable certainty.

If these were simply losses in a spar or even in a battle with low stake, Solomon's frustration wouldn't fester as strongly as it did at the current moment. Who could accept defeat that promised certain death, that promised watching those you cared for suffer at the hands of someone else? He didn't wish to take her words as negligible, but he simply couldn't understand it at all. Age would never fix that.

"I humbly respect your advice. Your words do not fall entirely on deaf ears, but what is there to learn from battles to the death where I am always suffering a loss where I watch those I care for burned, stabbed, frozen, and hospitalized? It isn't about my ability. If these were lesser battles, with lower stakes? Fine. Let's call it an experience to learn from, but what is there to learn when I'm watching others suffer because of my inability...?"

What was the lesson? Did his ability even matter?

"Older people have been around longer, thus have been defeated more often. And thus, are better at dealing with it. So yea, youth matters. Like it does everywhere"

Hannah would take a seat as Solomon poured out his heart over the pain he had suffered. It was hard to consider what you could learn when your life was on the line, but that was what introspection was for.

"Don't get burned. Don't get stabbed. Don't get frozen. Don't get hospitalized. Every battle is one where you learn how to use your power, and how not to use your power. How to get hit, and how to not get hit. If they suffered because of your inability, they is it not true you are suffering because of their inability? If they were so stunningly able, you would not be in this position.

Everyone starts at the bottom. Don't let yourself stay sucked into the quagmire of defeat. Take what happened, run it over in your mind, play it back again and again. I could potentially even make a Kido where you can fight people you have met before. Potentially. It's a wild thing even for me. But, the manual way is also fine. See what worked, see what didn't, see where you did right and how you survived. And build on that"

"I'm here... because of their inability?"

Solomon took a moment to parse her heartfelt words. His scrutinizing gaze peering off into the reflection of the ivory desk he struck at in anger moments ago. Easier said than done. How many times did he have to learn? How many times did he have to endure the pain of watching those he cared for hurt? First, it had been Giselle, a woman who risked her life for a mere rookie.

She could have let him die. He was the weak link. A fool in over his head. A whelp of a warrior who had no place on the battlefield. Second, it had been Kokuto who threw him out of harm's way in the same battle, and all he had to show for it was a stroke of lightning against his otherworldly enemy's frame. Then, there was Mizu. His most recent failure. He activated Letz stil with the intent of cleaving through his enemy's defenses, and all he did was shatter the ice barrier she formed in the midst of his attack. Another stroke of lightning amounting to nothing but a chink in the armor. A drop of blood if that.

"What about overwhelming defeat? The kind where you can't even deduce what you did wrong...? How can I learn from battles that are over before they begin... when I'm so severely outclassed?!"

For his efforts, he was repaid with the sight of seeing Mizu put up her own valiant effort only to watch Mizu frozen into a living statue of ice. A friend and rival defeated because of his inability to keep up. Sighing in exasperation, he found himself uncertain if he wished to acknowledge those first words, but she was genuinely trying to help, and so he didn't have it in him to simply ignore her words. His expression only welcomed a greater pain in his voice, as though he were almost on the verge of breaking down.

"I know this path would be hard, but I didn't think it would be so painful. Hannah... you are among one of the strongest kido users in existence. You are strong. I am... I don't know what I am anymore."

"Ohh, those just suck" Hannah would reply, shrugging and sitting down next to them, her tone turning more candid and far less elegant. More conversational and casual than it was. "The most you can learn from them is what bones break in what manner. I had one myself in China, where I was just a little bug hiding being Sing's skirt. I wasn't as strong as I am now, but I wasn't far off. And the guy was just flicking incantation Hadō 90s away like they weren't even there. I had this cool staff that super-charged a Kido I ran through it, and he took a incanted Hadō 99 through that staff, and it hurt his arm a little.

And then outside Karakura. I got into an arguement with a guy called Sou. Erupted into a fight, where - now as strong as I am now - I blasted him with all my arsenal. And then he nearly killed me with the shockwave of one of his attacks that was left over after smashing through my staff-charged Hadō 99"

Hannah would lean her head against the wall, and shake her head.

"What you are right now is young, and sensitive. Getting your ass thrashed to this degree is rather a new experience for you. But remember; 'This too will pass away'. We are ephemeral. Live to be a thousand years old, and you are but a second to civilization. So don't spend your second decrying the fates"