It's Been Alright, I Guess [Liltotto/Natasha]

A venomous feeling rose in her stomach to hail a sensation of illness when Natasha attempted to give words of comfort and understanding. As much as she understood what Natasha was trying to say, she couldn't help but have a twist in her gut over her friend's words, that they felt far more shorter-sighted than the reality of the situation. But she couldn't just up and snap at Natasha, no matter how awful she felt, and how much it felt the point was being flown over, the yellow eyes of the woman softly darting as if in thought, to not act on an impulsive feeling, before letting out a sigh of clear frustration yet an obvious go at sparing her friend's feelings.

"..Nat, i'm about three-hundred years old," She'd begin, "Majority of that time, I was stuck in a kid body. I didn't even get to dream of having half the things i'd have been expected of by my twenties. That is, even if life was normal when I made it to my twenties; I was running for my life before then. Before that night, I was just a dumb teeny witchling incapable of speech and possibly was some hell-borne faechild to my village. I was an attentive but unambitious student to the Quincy. I was the only thing Giselle could call a family when she was nuts," A darkness hit her eyes, "And I lost all of that in the span of only a few years. I had nothing, Nat. No family, no home, no future. My greatest nightmares and far more had just sprung from my sleep and played out right in front of me, and it was all thanks to those sword-fumbling fucktards who play god. And I cannot do a thing about that. I couldn't do a thing about it then, or now."

Her eyes drew to meet Natasha's, her normally neutral expression barely hiding a swirl of complicated emotions scarce few could truly comprehend, "I hate, hate, to sound like i'm downplaying you at all, but I have to say that I don't think it's comparable. It's.. A lot more complicated than it looks."

There was no harm in being honest. In truth, Natasha's options were limited from the start when it came to nursing the woman's overall anguish she suffered with every day of her trouble existence. If she hosted a conversation with herself, brutal honesty is all Natasha would have offered herself, too. Indeed, their circumstances were as far from comparison as heaven and earth.

If anything, looking back on her own life, she could have avoided what happened in her own past, traveled the path of least resistance to maintain the status quo. Liltotto seemed as though her entire life had been mired in misfortune from the beginning, as though fate had rigged the results of her destiny from the very start. How could they even begin to compare?

Even if her words fell flat, Natasha was far too stubborn to simply let her simmer and stew in a conflux of emotions like this. If words didn't help, she'd simply be here to support her, to acknowledge her feelings, to let her speak and air our these thoughts. Even if her words amounted to nothing at all in the grand scheme, falling on deaf ears, she would be there for her. That was what it meant to have a great friend, after all, right? She wasn't in the business of affording to lose anymore of those.

Matching her conflicted gaze with one of unrestrained warmth, Natasha sighed softly as she waved her hand after the woman finished, dismissing any unease the woman felt at downplaying her words. Better she approach the truth with honesty than bullshit her and act like everything was okay. That would make her feel worse.

"...No kiddin'. You ain't wrong there, liltotto, so don't feel like you have to spare any disagreement at my expense. Sorry about that on my part. I probably am way off the mark with my perception of things, truth be told. It seems misfortune has followed you since the day you were born... and your history with the Soul Society... didn't make it any better. I can't even begin to relate to half of what you've been through..."

Natasha simply kept her arm around the woman, firmly patting her shoulder as she continued to hold her gaze. There was no advice she prepared to offer this time, but only a reminder of her presence, a revelation that she was already acutely aware above all else. No matter what, she would offer her support. That was, quite simply, the best she could do now. Hers were demons she couldn't vanquish with words, and perhaps almost no one else would truly understand the weight Liltotto bore every day of her centuries worth of existence, but she would try to help her in anyway she desired, even if it meant being a listening ear rather than a motivational voice.

"Again, I don't know what the future holds. I wanna' say things'll play out differently. I really do. I hate to see you goin' through it' like this. I can't even begin to fathom how the current circumstances might be weighin' down on you, either. I'd be bullshittin' ya somethin' fierce if I continued fumblin' round for answers or comparison that don't match, but no matter what... just speak to me. Talk ma' ears off. Voice your frustrations. I might not be the biggest help, I reckon, but I'm here Liltotto. No matter what happens, I'm here."

She was prepared to listen to the woman all night if that was what it took. She clearly had no solution here, no set of words that could sway the tide, but she had vast reserves of support to offer. It was really the best she could do for her in a moment like this.

Liltotto kept her gaze averted, as if unwilling to betray her feelings to her friend, a mixed sort running through her mind. She knew Natasha would only ever mean well, but she couldn't tell her everything. Alastair struggled to hold his wit when she even began with that subject... But she couldn't just keep her entirely in the dark..

With her friend's final thoughts, she'd speak in reply, a sense of deep emotion and thought on her plain face, "..I don't wanna to be pitied or felt bad for if I talk about it, OK? I'm working it out on my own," A lie was hidden in there - she was just as uncertain about what to do with certain revelations as anyone else who would've been cast into such a situation, blindfolded and tied up into a confusing mire of information, "..But i'll talk about something, at least."

"Like I said, Lil', I'm here. I'm not gonna pity you or feel bad for you. If anything, I'll just foolishly, optimistically believe you'll overcome it somehow, someway. What matters is that you're expressin' yourself and allowin' your thoughts to be released. Keepin' it bottled in sure ain't gonna help things, right?"

Natasha simply maintained the same stance she held a moment ago. She wasn't properly equipped to handle the existential dread this woman had developed over countless centuries, but Natasha certainly held a firm belief that she could brave the storm by listening to anything the woman felt the need to express. Even if they were worlds apart in terms of understanding, she certainly knew the necessity in bearing one's feelings out in the open. Keeping it held in helped no one, and it only made the individual holding their emotions in feel terrible. Reaching over to place her hand atop her own, she would offer the woman a supporting smile of genuine warmth as she gazed at the sun slowly sinking into the horizon.

"Just talk to me, and speak your piece until ya' feel like you want to stop, okay? I'm all ears, sweetheart."