Born From The Fear[Ajora, Hiroe ]

How long had it been since she'd ventured this far out into the rukongai? The Shino Academy had been everything she could have ever hoped for. A treasure trove of knowledge. And yet..... it still felt.... incomplete. She spent enormous ammounts of time poring through records and scrolls. Exploring the lore and information that surrounded the Soul Society. The legacy of the soul king who served as the mysterious leader. The Gotei which maintained the balance of souls. The Hollows which naturally emerged from souls clinging to the world of the living, and of course their duty to cleanse these beasts.

But ..... was that it? Who had maintained the balance before the shinigami had been around? Surely this organization of regulators had not existed unto the beginning of creation. If this was abalanced world, had it ever been unbalanced? What was it that kept Souls from hollowfying once they were in the world of the dead? WHY did the world of the living cause souls to begin hollowfying? She had learned so much, and even so.... it was startling just how little room there had been beyond her initial understanding. The curriculum was rudimentary at best, but she also knew better than to go asking questions.

She managed an ample presence among her peers. Her own penchant for Kido had garnered many things, including even a means of concealing her disfigurement and more ..monstrous qualities. At least in the most rudimentary way. She'd learned fairly quickly in her ...reclusive period of limited interaction that these qualities drew more attention than she was comfortable with. So she'd diverted her attention to come up with a solution. And now she was back to the grindstone. Studying the four pillars that made up a shinigami's skills. And of course, continuing to search and question.

After all. After the first few weeks, it had become pretty clear that there was no information to be garnered on her REAL questions simply from looking around what was available to the students. If nothing else, she'd come to understand how ....secretive the Soul society could be. Especially in proing over it's history. And so, instead she focused on building her skills. Understanding them to the fullest extent of her abilities.

If she could not find her answers by finding them in a book, she would simply learn how this world worked, piece by piece. If she could, then she would simply be able to DEDUCE how it all came to be. It was the simplest solution. A simple, core purpose. And it was .... perhaps a bit startling when that sense of purpose seemed to ... effect her friend.

Ajora had not been blind to Hiroe's... progress over the last month or so. At first, the girl had been ....no. The girl was STILL alarmingly supportive. She kept a safe and social distance from the other students. Simply out of habit. She didn't enjoy people she didn't know getting overly familiar. But Hiroe was soemthing of a stable constant. A singular social link. Besides, people seemed to leave her alone a lot more when she hung out with the woman. But that usual zeal seemed to dull as of late. It was only natural for Ajora to investigate.

She cocked her head to the side as she sensed the woman's spiritual energy from afar. Outside of the little shop that she worked at. Ajora paused a short distance away, watching as Hiroe peddled her goods to the errant passerby. Waiting until the last one wandered away and Hiroe was, briefly, by herself, before promptly appearing with a shunpo. An act which often spooked the young woman when she did so unannounced. At first it was something she'd done simply incidentally. But over time, she'd begun doing it intentionally. The woman's reactions were....entertaining.

"There you are. I was wondering where you were. You're usually out and about much earlier. You're not thinking of skipping afternoon classes are you?" She ventured. As direct as ever.

A small smile flitted across Ajora's lips as she promptly spooked the everliving hell out of the woman before her. Something of an impish expression crossing her face as she let her head cant to the side. "I'd never get tired of it. After all, you're the one who keeps daydreaming and dropping your guard." She pointed out impishly, no small amount of enjoyment in the woman's voice as she so blatantly teased the other woman. A side that few others got to witness from the woman. Ajora in general flat out just elected not to give much of anything to others who spoke with her. But around Hiroe, that playful bullying side of her did come out.

All the same, Ajora slowly began walking around the immediate area, taking a moment to remember the space she'd been in before. Right, the little shop, the one she'd mistaken for being Hiroe's property. Hmmm. She closed her eyes, thinking for a moment before glancing back over her shoulder. "Hm. So you ARE thinking of playing Hookie." She murmured softly, shaking her head for a moment and sighing, a soft tisk tsik escaping her before she put on a smile. "You put me in an awkward position. I'm your friend, I can't just let you neglect your classes. I'll have to just pick you up and carry you to class myself." She reasoned casually, though Hiroe would know that it was VERY possible that Ajora was entirely serious. The woman was a mystery to quite a few individuals in class, but there was one thing that had spread like wildfire since she joined: She was actually freakishly strong. Something that she'd revealed entirely on accident in the first few days of class when she'd sent one of the more overconfident boys clean through a practice dummy during a spar. SINCE then, she'd made sure to hold herself back, but around Hiroe, Ajora was much more liable to show off her strength.

A sigh escaped her and she sat down next to Hiroe. "But I'm a little curious. Why don't you want to go to class? Is something bothering you?" She added quietly. Pivoting from that playful bullying tone to a more .... curious inflection. This WAS the same girl that had seemed so incredibly excited to be in school alongside Ajora after all.

She paused, her head canting a bit to the side as she watched that troubled expression pass over Hiroe's face. Something had happened it seemed, Ajora was more than smart enough to know that. And she had sensed some....interesting things around Hiroe. She had hardly been THERE. But there were some ....interesting residual energies around Hiroe that she'd noticed. Something had happened, and now her interest welled slightly as the girl spoke of such a situation and asked for Ajora's perspective.

She considered, pausing a moment to think about how she should answer. She had one already, but she decided to put up the act of thinking it over. considering, to reassure Hiroe that she wasn't simply speaking without thinking.

"I've had a situation like that. prior to joining the gotei. I attempted to do some investigations into the outter districts. And collect information. However, he denizens of that place were.... stronger than I expected. Considerably so. so I bided my time. Collected information as I could. And tackled it day by day. As it so happened, I was lucky enough to be approached by a member of the Gotei. They brought up my joining, and I remembered you had suggested as much as well. And so I accepted. I guess I never DID finish that investigation.." She frowned, as if she hadn't thought about that before.

"I suppose I would simply handle it one step at a time. And well... we are hardly alone. There are other, stronger individuals in the gotei for us to rely on. Why, has someone been picking on you?" She asked with a tilt of her head, and a hint of concern peppered onto her words as she looked her friend over.

Ajora was not surprised. Watching the woman closely, she nodded along as Hiroe gave her explanation. She could certainly tell the woman was upset, that had been abundantly obvious, what she was interested in was the source of all this inner turmoil. Whatever it was had clearly rattled the poor woman. And so she sat down beside the other woman and listened as she began to open up just a little. She understood the envy in thwe other woman's eyes.

After all, she saw it in so many of her classmates already.

But all the same, she gave Hiroe a moment to collect herself. Pausing and ... looking to the side. "Well. That isn't the plain and simple of it. If you must know. There's something else driving me forward. Take your time. You don't need to tell me what's happening right away. I can tell that it's something that's bothering you quite a lot. But.... you shouldn't consider yourself beneath me." She noted quietly, a sigh escaping her as she looked around, ensuring that nobody else was around. At least, thats what she appeared to be doing. Turning back to Hiroe, she closed her eyes and slumped her shoulders.

"Hiroe. This curiosity of mine. It's not always a good thing." She noted very quietly./ Reaching out. She paused..... and then allowed that thin veil of Kido to peel away. Running down her left side. Until the damaged and mutilated portion of her body came to light. And rather than a soft, gentle hand. That dark, clawed left arm of hers gently rested over Hiroe's own. Showing what Ajora put so much effort into hiding.


"I've been exploring a lot of information about the duties of soul reapers. And I believe that ....I don't think that I was a normal human when I came to the rukongai." She explained calmly, a hint of....distress, faint in the tone of her voice. "I believe that I may have been a hollow that was cleansed. And this .... injury of mine. My face... and my Arm... May be the result of a quincy destroying a piece of my soul." She expressed softly. Her voice very quiet, secretive, in fact.

"And I admit. You may think that I am always in control and ....without worry. But I wanted to express that that is not the case. I have worries of my own. I .... I'm certainly not perfect." She noted softly to the other woman. Her good eye downcast, as if a bit ..anxious as to how Hiroe would react to this revelation.

Ajora was.... glad that this display seemed to work. A bit of vulnerability and Hiroe opened right up. And she was glad, for certain, to see that the woman appreciated this. And some small part of Ajora did...enjoy this. expressing these deeper machinations. Which made the lie a bit harder to tell. She had considered the origin of her scarring, but the truth of it was, she didn't feel that was a conclusive answer. Was it the best she currently had? Absolutely. However, it felt...incomplete. But in this instance, she didn't exactly have a better answer. And it wasn't as if she had portrayed it as gospel. She'd stated it was just a theory. But still there was a ....hint of insincerity she felt. But if nothiong else.... at least it got Hiroe to open up.

Ah....guilt. It was ... strange. It sounded a little silly. Hiroe acted as if she were some seated officer with a reputation to uphold. She was a mere student, why did she expect herself to be some hero in the face of danger? But no, she could tell this was likely a bit of ......self worth issues. Close to what she had already presumed. But now given a bit more....context as to why.

Though, she did notice that Hiroe avoided specifying what it was that had spooked her. But that didn't matter for now. Pulling her friend into a hug, Ajora sighed a bit. "Hiroe. You don't...HAVe to be brave you know. During my excursion into the outter districts, I certainly didn't fight to the last. I ran as soon as I felt out of my league. Impressive as many of our ....more easily entertained classmates may think. I don't feel as if ...well.. a fair number of the gotei squads would really suit me. I don't think that I'm quite brave enough for Seventh. I don't think I'm social enough to really fit into First. Even those who have brought up Third division leaves a sense of ... unease about it." She murmured quietly. Looking off to the side.

"But neither of us has to worry about that. Curriculum is about six years. We have all the time in the world to become more...brave... or social. OR less....dark monster-y." She smiled, wiggling the claws on her hand before kido crackled back into place, disguising it as a normal arm again. With what she hoped was a reassuring bookend to their little chat. Or well, this specific subject anyway.