Corporate Retreat (Closed)

"Yeah? Well guess what. Being unhappy is just a fact of life, shit happens. Talking to some hollow shell with my captain's face is more painful than anything she could do."

It was maddening, so so frustrating that this "thing" was speaking on behalf of her. He just wanted to beat up this barrier between him and talking to her. Not that he could, she was a girl still and also Murasaki. No way was he going to be able to throw a punch as futile as it'd have been against both of the titans in the room.

"You think all the other captains sit in their offices moping when something goes wrong? You're not a failure. You're the best captain, who cares about needing to prove something and are we all that meaningless that you can't be proud of the squad you made, that you raised? Why does the opinion of other people matter when we're the ones that care about you?"

He tried to glaze over the fact she admitted to thinking about suicide. He even winced when he heard it but tried to push forward. If he backed off from such a thought being shared it'd do nothing to help break down her shield (cage)?

Arkin's voice was low as he spoke with almost a solemn level seriousness, for this was not his view or emotions on the matter but the truth. Henrex had been fired, something he had never seen before. Murasaki may have had her faults, and may have learned some hard lessons but the fact she kept her command show'd that there was potential within her. That her duty was not yet done, and to entertain the thought of her ending her life filled him with almost a rage.

The man would sqaut as callous hands gripped the hot metal of the pan, unconcerned with the heat which should normally burn a normal man as he pour'd himself a bowl- follow'd by the others if they wished. As he placed the stew back he'd lift some to his mouth, taking in the earth aroma and taste. A sigh left his mouth as sky blue irises looked at the two.

"...Ah..."

Murasaki wasn't entirely sure what to say. To either of them, really. She was at a loss for words, and considering she was already pushing her emotions back with everything she had...it wasn't working well enough now. She was shaking more and more, and her hands seemed as if they were desperately trying to grip something that wasn't there. She turned her gaze to Arkin, then to Alastor. The captain was stuck for words, seeming to grasp for anything she could say to them to rebut their words. But she found nothing, nothing but an echoing of what they had said to her in their mind.

They were her division, her loyal comrades. She had brought them in, trained them, and above all cared for them. The 7th Division...they were like her family, weren't they? Murasaki looked downward then, and her expression didn't change at first. But tears had begun to stream down her face now, and in no small number. She was shaking more and more, and gradually, the facade she had aimed to build up for so long was crumbling. But that was okay, wasn't it? Didn't they deserve better?

"...I'm sorry..."

Unable to find anything more she was able to express, Murasaki gripped Alastor in a tight embrace, and with the last of her inner tranquility gone, she wept into her comrade's shoulder, sobbing from her very core. There was not a single bit of restraint, not an ounce of subtlety to it. Only the pent up grief of a woman who had not allowed herself to feel in far too long.

Hey it worked! What a damn victory for them, Alastor and Arkin, the chads of seventh division. There was a wave of triumph as her visage broke and they got through to her. Then what came next caught him off guard and he was trapped in her arms and she was crying, neither of those were good. Well the hug was admittedly nice but that thought was trapped in the back of his mind while his inner monologue devolved into fuck fuck fuck.

What was he meant do do now? His arms hadn't yet returned the embrace and she had him locked down so he couldn't even look at Arkin for help. All he could really do was just wrap his arms around her in return and try to keep his bright red face covered. It was weird having a girl up so close to him like this, a crying one no less.

"Hey it's okay. I- uh... We forgive you."

Maybe it was a bit wrong for him to speak for Arkin and put words into his mouth but he was pretty confident he got it right. Not that he meant to stop Arkin from speaking his own piece.

Arkin felt something akin to pain in this moment, some foreign emotion which he long abandon'd in the pursuit of greater things. As Murasaki wept the viking could only tilt his head downward as if to conceal the shame which was etched onto his features. It was unbecoming for a warrior to show their pain, but perhaps things had changed since he was a youngling. The unimaginable pain which his captain must be suffering caused him anguish, a pain which ripped through his immortal being.

The distance sound of thunder grew, as if the sky it's self was answering the pain of Arkin with fierce roars. As he settled his gaze upon the scene of Murasaki and Alastor, he knew his place among them. That rock which was unmoving, as old and timeless as the Gotei it's self. So he allow'd for her to weep as he lifted the bowl once more to his lips sipping, allowing her to get it all out of her system. Finally, he would speak after Alastor.

"What good is a man without his family? What good is a family that is broken? I recall when I was cast out from my family, and I became a child of the Gotei. So many years ago. So many faces gone. I will admit, I have not always been the most understanding of men. I have not adapt'd to the world well enough to be able to find the words to ease your pain."

The man closed his eyes once more, as if taking a deep breath grasping hold of the responsibility he held. As much as his Captain had faltered, he failed to be the steadying hand they needed. It was a grave mistake which lead to her current state, and he knew it was perhaps something Alastor may not understand. He was young, and able to change. But Arkin was not, all Arkin could do was try harder to not fail in his duties.

"We have fallen far my captain, but we may yet see ourselves reforged into the tool the Gotei needs. We besieged by failures, doubt, and disloyalty. I cannot remedy this on my own, you cannot do so. But if the three of us can leave this land, and commit ourselves once more- we may redeem ourselves."

Murasaki cried for a very long time, it should be noted. She sobbed until there were no more tears left to shed, and even then she continued to hiccup and moan in sheer grief for a while longer. It was almost pathetic, if not for the scope of the emotion behind it. When it was all said and done, she still kept Alastor very firmly in her grip, not quite ready to let go of him just yet. But she listened carefully to Arkin, and after a few deep breaths and a little time to collect herself, she spoke quietly, her voice still unsteady, and of course quite hoarse from her crying.

"We... Yeah, we have some work to do, don't we..."

Her hold on Alastor tightened a little more, her resolve definitely solidifying now. Oh, she was still very upset. There was still a lot more crying she'd be doing, a lot more she'd have to deal with. But at least now she was dealing with it, not just running away from it. She'd done that for way too long, and that was just...that wasn't okay, you know? She didn't like that one bit.

"Alright. We'll head back in the morning, 'kay? We got tons we gotta do. First things first, we'll need some more people."

Finally releasing her compatriot from her grip, Murasaki rifled through her belongings before pulling out an exceptionally ornate lacquered wooden box, along with three masu and setting them all down. She'd picked these up...well, it'd been a long time ago now. She'd always kinda meant for this to be saved for a special occasion, and she really wasn't sure if there'd ever be an occasion more special than this. With a crack, she opened the box and filled all three masu to overflowing, handing them to Arkin and Alastor with a small, timid smile before raising her own.

"Kanpai."

She was still crying, jeez. It was awkward but strangely nice, even though she was sad it was the first bit of emotion that reminded him that she did actually have them. He was glad Arkin was here and good at this stuff, he was totally lost. The best he could really do was reach up and rub her back. That was comforting, right?

"Sounds like a plan Cap'n"

Smiling at her willingness to strive towards better horizons. He accepted her the offered masu and nodded with an embarrassed dorky smile of his own with the space between them finally, a much more comfortable and at ease state despite the fact he wouldn't necessarily have called their proximity unpleasant either.

What came out of Arkin's voice was more akin to a thunder clapping in the distance, or lightning striking an anvil. It was unrestrained and powerful in it's want to be heard, as he grabbed whatever the drink was which was handy and raised it. Spilling some of the contents onto his arms, a rolling laughing leaving his lips now that things had calmed. This was good even if it lead to the tears of his captain, such things where needed in order to grow between the three.

He'd bring the drink to his lips downing the contents with little to no struggle, millenniums of alcoholic indulgent had it's benefits. But gradually he'd settle down back to his seat. He knew tomorrow would bring many new challenges for them to face, but one thing was more important than all; his captain was back. In her coming back he now believed they could overcome the struggles before them, and once again restore their division to a seat of honor. His mouth opening as he yawned, provided nothing else was needed from him he'd settle into a sleeping state.

Naturally, he snored.