What makes a great writer?

What makes a great writer? Quite honestly, there isn’t a single day where I don’t find myself asking this question. Still, I’d like to see it from the eyes of others and how a great writer is defined within their eyes. It is a level I strive towards each day to reach. To me, writing is like a newborn baby ready to be nurtured with love and care. When you find the flow of your words coming together perfectly, that newborn undoubtedly grows with every passing second. This analogy could be used with many things. Everyone starts out at a level that they are embarrassed of, when they look back on everything. Indeed, there is always room for improvement. I, as much as anyone, can attest to that fact without shame. I think I lack the confidence and pride that most writers do in their work, in fact you could say that I’m quite ashamed of my children every day, at times I even look down upon my skills with disdain. I know, of course, that I’ve made great strides in the last four years, but that does little to lessen what I feel I’m still lacking. Even now, I know there’s a level that I haven’t quite reached yet, but I cannot pinpoint what that is. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll attain the confidence needed to walk towards my future without this low self-esteem I have in myself. It wasn’t limited to writing, however. During my times in school, like any other aspiring kid trying to separate themselves from the idiots and wayward fools that are their peers, I experienced just how cruel school life could be at times. As an ever growing man with hormones, I use too do my best to impress girls that caught my eye. Looking for that acceptance, I foolishly tried many things to fit in with the “In crowd”. My memories of school were anything but sour, however. I do admit that some days I miss hanging around such groups of people. Even in my own life, away from this computer, confidence was hard to acquire. I was always told many times that it does not come from people, but rather from one’s self. When I look back on my old writings, be them stories or threads I had the honor of participating in with my fellow partners in the role-play universe, i laugh. Not out of contempt or embarrassment – I admit I am embarrassed to read how horrid my grammar was – but out of happiness at my progress. I’m sure others can agree with me that practice comes a long way. Still, when I read books, and now lately, visual novels, I find myself brooding from time to time. Is this a problem other people experience? I always feel as though I am inferior to all those around me, be it a man who draws in beautiful women with his charm, popular writers, or anyone at all really. My mom once told me, “If you yourself won’t take pride in your efforts, then who else do you expect will?” I took these words to heart. They spoke to me more than any “Oh, you’ll get better” or “Dude, you’re good” would, any day. I love praise. I do everything to acquire it and I always ask people to look over my work and give me their honest opinion. But it never seems to help me for any more than a few days. A great friend told me one thing the other day, “Do you want to know the level you have yet to reach? The facts that, there will be others who read your writing and love your work, and the fact that others will hate it. “It definitely spoke to me. As an aspiring writer, someday, I wish to experience such feelings. I still feel as though its far off, but I know brooding on it will do nothing more than cause me to falter and fall towards oblivion. In the end, I realized something. A great writer is not one who is able to enthrall his writer with fancy words and flowery speech, but rather be someone who can seize his reader’s heart. …About that confidence problem. I still have yet to fix it completely, but I have at least found my way as a writer and as a person. What makes anyone great is their will to practice, and the willpower capacity to handle adversity at every corner. My dilemmas with writing and confidence in and of itself have always been my biggest enemies, but I know in the end that I have defeated them in some manner at least. Like the antagonists of any story of the hero, they will always be my reoccurring enemies. Still, I will strive towards my goals until I reach the level that I will never again feel ashamed of my wonderful children. I’ll give birth to each one someday, and nurture them until even they are able to drag their own creator in with each tale. I hope others can feel like this too. That, no matter how hard this cruel world can be, that there is always a goal to reach for and that while it may be difficult, it is not at all impossible to reach it.