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Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 12:01 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] GErtDg6](https://i.imgur.com/GErtDg6.png)
NATASHA MILLER | HUMANITY'S STRONGEST SOLDIER
There was no sugarcoating it. Natasha hadn't really kept in contact with certain people in her life. Outside of a select few she spoke with recently, she had been a relatively busy woman the last few months. Duty called, with coordinator missions taking away a significant portion of her time. It wasn't the best excuse for the lack of communication, but it was something at least.
Of course, out of most of her them, her more glaring error was falling out of contact with Ehefera. Did she feel like it was an error? On one hand, for someone who had proven a source of support when she seened to be falling apart at the seams, she undoubtedly felt it was. On another, part of her deflected the whole matter, pushing it in the back of her mind. Treated it as something to worry about later. There were the occasional hospital visits after Miami, but everything else grew distanced after that. What would she even say? Play it off? Talk about things?
She didn't really know. Either way, it was definitely better to air things out now. Preparing some food ahead of time in her household, packing into a bag, Natasha traveled toward Ehefera's house on a motorcycle. Casually dressed for the occasion, a blue cap with a star engraved in the center, a long and airy t-shirt, and a pair of jeans. Casual wear. Nothing eye-catching. Twisting her cap around, Natasha parked her car safely outside Ehefera's place. Grabbing the lunch she had prepared in a basket, she walked up toward the woman's door. Rapping her fist against it a few times. Time sure did fly, she mused wryly.
END POST | ALL IS WELL, SAFELY REST
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 12:20 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/894742248649031731/936842814698979408/HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb.png)
It wasn't in ehefra's character to ....inflict herself on others. She reached out and helped where she could. She kept an eye on her durect subordinates, and certainly she welcomed the friends in her life checking in. But when those friends began to drift, she wasn't the sort of woman to reel them back in.
No. No, it was much more reasonable to just figure they were busy. Maybe they had just been out of sorts. All kinds of little eccuses pushed that subtle underlying worry out of her mind. What had happened to Natasha? And she'd done .... a fair bit of work to distract herself from that very question. She kept herself busy. Such as she was tonight. Work on training golems for the most part, trying to work out a few bugs that had shown up. A bit of burning midnight oil, so rather than cook, she'd ordered some pizza. She didn't even think twice when the doorbell rang, promptly hopping up and grinning from ear to ear. Honestly she was STARVING, proooobably should have gotten food a bit earlier in the day but she'd gotten distracted.
And lo and behold, Ehefra blinked in surprise when she opened the door and instead saw Natasha standing right there infront of her.
"Oh fuck uh... hey Natatasha. You droping by for dinn....ner?" She glanced up, wait....it wasn't night. Holy fuck it was like, around noon. How long had she been working? She blinked a few times before a smile formed and she stepped aside. "Well hey uh.. come in. What can I help you with, Coordinator?" She asked with an inquisitive smile. Coordinator. Not Nat. Ehefra was talking as if they were still at work. As if hesitant to be too ....familiar.
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 1:44 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] GErtDg6](https://i.imgur.com/GErtDg6.png)
NATASHA MILLER | HUMANITY'S STRONGEST SOLDIER
Coordinator, eh? She expected that one. It was a natural reaction, truth be told. What were you supposed to say to the lady who hadn't spoken to you in months? Normally, she would have certainly told her she preferred to be referred to at Nat. That was her common namesake with all her friends, but this was clearly a little more complicated than that. Setting a familiar pace here would definitely be... interesting. Stepping into her home, Natasha turned back to the woman with a leisurely smile, lifting up the basket of food like an offering. She figured the best course of action was to carry herself as she always did. It had never failed her before, all things considered, and she definitely felt confident in her chances here. At the very least, there wasn't any hostility present in Ehefera's mannerism. Best to go at her pace for now.
"Howdy, Heff. It's been awhile. I did bring some supper along, yeah, but if your meal plans are already spoken for then I'll just place this basket off to the side. Ya busy? I figured we could catch up on lost time over a meal... if yer willin', of course."
END POST | ALL IS WELL, SAFELY REST
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 10:45 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/894742248649031731/936842814698979408/HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb.png)
Ehefra paused, glancing toward the basket and giving a slight chuckle. "Ah yea, I was expecting pizza. But uh, hey we can have a little fifty fifty meal, I'm never gonna say no to food." She smiled, Beeps floating in through the door frame to tilt its head quizzically. But even more than that, Ehefra...hesitated just a little as Natasha brought up why she was there, Stepping aside so that the woman could walk in before closing the door and falling quiet for a few moments.
"Yea, I mean... I kinda haven't seen you since I was in the hospital I guess I was in a bad place though." She let her voice trail off. She stared out the window for a moment as her mind went back to ......how she was getting out of the hospital. She'd become pretty insufferable. She didn't blame Natasha for keeping her distance. Honestly, it had probably been for the best that Natasha had kept her distance. A lot of things were probably for the best.
"So uh. What have you been up to? Anything ....interesting?" Her attempt at conversation was awkward, skipping around a few dark clouds in the back of her mind. As good as it was for Natasha, she couldn't help but wonder why she'd been away.
Ehefra knew what SHE had been going through. And she understood that some level of that darkness had slipped out. even Ritter Lamperd had picked up n it. But ...why had Natasha kept at bay? Why hadn't she ...helped her? When she needed someone? A question she did her best to ignore.
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 1:48 pm
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] GErtDg6](https://i.imgur.com/GErtDg6.png)
NATASHA MILLER | HUMANITY'S STRONGEST SOLDIER
"Fifty-fifty is fine by me. Hope ya don't mind if I steal a couple of slices."
Offering a playful quip in response, Natasha observed Ehefera somewhat curiously. There was no denying that the atmosphere had changed between them, that the casual way with which they approached one another was clearly absent here. Some part of her thought it was imperative to clear the awkwardness hanging in the air, another simply brushed it aside. It wasn't exactly something she was yearning to indulge, no matter how much she had matured regarding emotional expression. After the hospital visits, there really hadn't been much contact. Time got away, her workload increased, and she hadn't made a concerted effort to keep in contact in spite of all that. Almost as if she cut her off like a bad habit. Reflecting on it wasn't helping, though. Speaking seemed more ideal at the moment.
"Workload increased. Time got away from me real fast. I reckon that ain't much of a proper excuse for keepin' out of touch with a friend for so long, though."
Natasha toyed with her cap a bit as she motioned for the woman to follow, hazel eyes looking for a proper place to sit. A nearby table, perhaps? She wasn't particularly trying to sit in any place that would have them too close. Hell, part of her didn't even want to humor the idea of a hug. Naturally, that, too, would have been a customary action. It almost felt like they were meeting one another for the first time. Even so, she had to persist. Ignoring things any longer would only make the separation worse.
"As for what I've been up to, ain't much on my end. Workload increase. Meeting new people in other divisions. Nothin' much to write home about. Whatta bout you, Heff? Anything interestin' on your end? Heard ya' recently stepped into a position of leadership."
END POST | ALL IS WELL, SAFELY REST
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 2:13 pm
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/894742248649031731/936842814698979408/HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb.png)
ehefra nodded her head a bit at that and nodded. Yea, that made sense. Between the Kurosaki incident, and then the Africa incident, it really was a little ....much. She could understand why Natasha had had to batten down the hatch. Hell, her OWN department being so busy had crtainly enabled her to stall tackling a number of her own issues. Probably for the worst.
"I guess things have been kinda crazy as of late. I uh.... am a little surprised I'm still managing to keep up I admit. It's not as busy as it used to be. I mean sure, I MAKE myself busy. But as an administrative leader, I mostly just make sure the next level of people are handling everything as they should be. I have my own projects but uh... yea." She noted, drumming her fingers for a moment as she rubbed the back of her head.
And after several moments, she gave a sheepish smile. "You really didn't have to check up on me. Nat." She noted very quietly, rubbing her eyelids before shaking her head. "I know that we have .... a bit of a history, but you really didn't have to. I .... don't know if you could call what I was, a 'friend' for you. But I do appreciate you checking in with me. The food.... the company.... making sure I'm okay..." She rubbed at her cheek before clearing her throat.
"I dunno why I'm just uh... saying this all of a sudden. But ....you know. You don't have to do this or ....check up on me. I ... I mean we both know what happened." She chuckled sheepishly. She'd used Natasha. In her own manipulative way, and the only reason she'd stopped was because Natasha was so nice that she'd gotten attached. And so, with the comfort of nat coming to check on her, there was also guilt. Guilt she was hoping to .... assuage in some way.
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Sun Jul 02, 2023 9:14 pm
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] GErtDg6](https://i.imgur.com/GErtDg6.png)
NATASHA MILLER | HUMANITY'S STRONGEST SOLDIER
Cutting straight to the matter at hand was an expected reaction to her kind gesture, truth be told. Expecting anything less would have been foolish, if not an outright insult to her own ability to grasp the gravity of importance her words meant. Natasha fell silent for a moment. What defined friendship? What was shared between them was certainly interesting, a line that ought not have been crossed, yet they crossed it, and here they were now. Looking back on it, Natasha acknowledged that she was far from an entirely innocent party herself, recognized her own antithetical selfishness in the matter. It was always something that had bothered her for a long time.
The fault of simply avoiding it altogether, of actually acting mature for her age rather than greedily giving in to what it felt like to enjoy a sense of affection, lied with her. Affection... Is that she could have called it? Even now, she wasn't certain what it was, where it would have went, and she sure as hell didn't bother to explore it after a while. They shared intimate moments reserved for couples, under the veil of friends with benefits. Initially, that was fine. And then...
Ehefera complicated it by actually displaying what she viewed as genuine care for a friend when she witnessed the woman at one of her lower points in life, an act that endeared her to the young woman beyond what she initially expected. Natasha detached as she always did. Experiencing genuine intimacy felt sinful to her... even now. Not with all the skeletons in her closet. She was moving past it well enough, but it still lingered even now. Neither here nor there, the woman offered a simple shrug as she turned around to face the woman fully.
"Cuttin' right to the chase, huh? Guess it's better to clear the air now before we stuff ourselves silly like a pair of turkeys. I reckon I wasn't much of a friend to you either, sweetheart. You nearly lost yer' life in Miami, and all I had to repay you with is a few lousy ole' hospital visits in the aftermath. I sure as hell ain't a spitting image of a saint in any of this myself. Could you call what I was a friend, either?" She ventured plainly. Part of her truly had wondered what they represented to the other beyond anything else.
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Tue Jul 04, 2023 9:21 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/894742248649031731/936842814698979408/HEADER_CXaN6XIUEAA7QPb.png)
Ehefra stared for a few seconds as Natasha spilled her guts over the matter. They really did just sortof... tell eachother how they were feeling. More than strangers would. And yet they'd been pretty awful to eachother. If she was to accept the blame Natasha was putting on herself, at least. And for just a moment, the question as to what they exactly were came to mind. And Ehefra didn't really know what to think about that.
"I ... really don't know. I don't think this is how stuff is usually supposed to go. We just kinda ... suddenly became intimate, thanks to me. And we sortof just have that breach between us. We've kinda seen too much of eachother to be strangers. And then we both sortof trauma dumped on eachother. We know more about eachother than ....well. I mean... you know more about me than a lot of people." She noted softly, rubbing the back of her head. "and I feel comfortable telling you this stuff. Stuff I probably wouldn't tell someone who I was like...dating. I'm not really sure how to feel about that." She admitted softly, rubbing the back of her neck before she turned and looked at Natasha.
"And you being pretty doesn't help. Honestly Its a little fucking annoying. I used to hate it. And I guess in a wayI still kinda do, it's distracting." She sighed, closing her eyes and then giving a sheepish smile. "I dunno.... I want to be your friend. After all, I've been able to rely on you. With my testing, with training. With... my personal stuff. I just feel comfortable. But I also feel like I've betrayed some of your trust. Even if I helped you, maybe it wasn't always for the right reasons." She sighed, rubbing her face a bit. And then chuckling softly.
"And I can't help but feel manipulative. That I just... throw this all out infront of you. I did that on purpose before you know. You share a little someything, and suddenly people start trusting you. so I just .... told you stuff. And now.... Its kinda nice having someone to throw this stuff at." She closed her eyes and shook her head. And for just a moment.... her mind went back.
Back to something someone very important to her had said a long time ago.
'You'll make a good wife to some lucky soul one day, you know that?'
The memory stung. And she closed her eyes, and took a slow, steady breath as she felt her eyes mist just a little.
And she stood up, her gaze becoming more firm as she suddenly fixed Natasha with a firm gaze. Looking back... THINKING about what she'd been. What she'd done. Maybe she wasn't a good person. Maybe she'd been an awful person. But she didn't have to BE that awful person. Once upon a time, even if she hadn't done it for the right things, she'd
BEEN good. She'd DONE, good.
"Natasha. If it's alright with you. I know maybe we haven't been the best of friends. But .....I wouldn't mind being a friend for you. If anything, I think I owe you that much. If you wouldn't mind having a friend like me."
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Tue Jul 04, 2023 11:34 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] GErtDg6](https://i.imgur.com/GErtDg6.png)
NATASHA MILLER | HUMANITY'S STRONGEST SOLDIER
Honesty was quite ideal concerning matters like these. There was no hint of deceit in Ehefera's words. She was genuinely expressing herself, and that made it easier for Natasha to acknowledge where her mind truly stood. And she was far from offended about these revelations, far from it. In actuality, it felt like a myriad of weights were slowly releasing from her shoulders. She was no fool to how it all began. It had simply blossomed into something that frightened her. Ehefera maintained that she was still the manipulative party, which was somewhat true to an extent, yes, but Natasha recognized that the fault hadn't entirely lied with her. Her silence might have been cause for worry, yet the smile lining her lips told a different tale entirely.
By all accounts, she could have rejected the woman still, holding steadfast until she avoided the idea altogether, but the fact of the matter was... Natasha had ended up enjoying her company, too. It felt nice to be acknowledged, to at least believe someone genuinely felt you were worth something even after you showed them the ugliest side of you. Beyond the trauma dumps, beyond these questionable moments where she felt like she was on the brink of losing her mind, Ehefera had proved a fine source of comfort even beyond the extracurricular activity.
Even now, to hear that she still acknowledged her as a friend was cathartic in a sense. She certainly had every reason to turn the tables if she so desired, manipulate the conversation to suit her own benefit. At any point, she could have washed her hands clean. Avoided her at the door. Or pretended things were strictly professional now, yet she did anything but express herself genuinely. Ehefera was placing most of the blame on her shoulders.
Regardless of who was in the wrong here, Natasha... didn't want to detach anymore. She wanted friendship. To savor what a bond felt like once more, her past be damned. Along with everyone else in the Vandenreich, or perhaps even more so, Natasha sincerely wanted Ehefera to remain in her life. She was mighty fine company once she moved past herself, minus the humorous - contradictory - ire for blonde women that never failed to make her chuckle. As Ehefera affixed her with that firm gaze after fully expressing her thoughts, Natasha lifted her cap up to reveal a cloudy pair of hazel eyes. There was some hint of tears there, perhaps, but she played it off well enough. To save face of course.
"First things first, the answer's yes, sweetheart. Course I'll have ya' as a friend. If it's quite alright with you, I'd like to express my thoughts, too. To clear the air for good, ya know?"
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Re: Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha]
Tue Jul 04, 2023 11:58 am
![Where Does The Good Times Go[Ehefera, Natasha] HEADER_93322526_p1_master1200](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/894742248649031731/958515794176802896/HEADER_93322526_p1_master1200.png)
A warm smile budded on Ehefra;'s lips as she spotted NAtasha's. A bit of confidence flowing in. She wasn't out of the woods of course. She still had to navigate things. Natasha was easy to please... honestly the woman was not judgemental, maybe that was because of her past, but if nothing else, she didn't have to worry about being led on. No, the challenge would be keeping herself in check. And so, she almost stepped in, about to pull Natasha into a hug when she was stalled by that last comment.
She blinked, and for a moment, was surprised. Natasha certainly, at least in the past, hadn't really been the type to ...well.. make a statement. She was so lax. And so the phrasing caught her a bit by surprise, as well as paused her move to pull the woman into a hug. Honestly, she had missed Natasha, but she knew enough restraint to hear what she had to say.
"Uhm, sure whats on your mind?"
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