2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross [April Fools]

2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross is a complex, though easy-to-operate Shinigami with a servile attitude. She wants nothing more than to provide a safe and easy way for families of up to 5 people to travel long distances and to and from work or school.

Being no stranger to adversity, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross is ready and willing to dive headfirst into the most rugged of roads if it means getting her driver and passengers where they need to go. In the academy, she was often picked on for "taking up too much space in the halls and classroom" and "leaving black tire treads everywhere", which helped harden her polypropylene exterior against this kind of verbal abuse.



Born in a Japanese manufacturing plant, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross was not even a year old when she entered the Shin'o Academy. Between her young age and inability to wield a Zanpakuto, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross struggled immensely in both her classes and search for a person or family to cough up the $25,795 USD necessary to purchase her.

Due to her inability to effectively wield a Zanpakuto larger than a venti-sized cup, perform Shunpo, fight hand-to-hand with Hakuda, or cast Kidō, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross was often ridden hard by her teachers, typically for up to 1-2 hours either to the local supermarket or beach and back. Despite these deficiencies 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross still managed to graduate top of her class by utilizing her 100,000 mile PowerTrain Warranty to train and drive harder than any of her classmates.

After graduation 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross found herself headhunted by the 7th Division who thought she would fit in perfectly with the squad (and thanks to her 28 mpg and 5-Star safety rating, she would make traveling on Earth a sitch). Since joining the 7th, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross has loved every minute of being in the Gotei and is glad her fellow squadmates are such sticklers about routine maintenance like oil changes.


» Forward Collision Mitigation: 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross possesses an advanced dashboard home to a variety of powerful features, including both audio and video signifiers of imminent collisions and can even force herself to brake without the driver's input.

» Lane Departure Warning: By using advanced sensors and cameras, 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross is able to detect her own location on the road and is able to warn her driver if and when she detects unintentional drifting between lanes.

» Automatic High Beam: One of 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross's most powerful techniques, Automatic High Beam functions as its name suggests: By detecting whether there are any vehicles ahead of her, she is able to swap between high beam and low beam headlights with no input from her driver.

» Mitsubishi Dynamic Shield: This passive ability is active at all times and presents itself in the form of 2023 Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross front-facing configuration. The large grate on her front allows for high performance and air intake, while the placement of her headlights allows for better pedestrian visibility at all times of day.


» Zanpakuto Name: Starbucks Cup

» Spirit Summary: Starbucks Cup appears as a soulless high-price coffee shop employee who's eyes reveal just how broken they truly are.

» Inner World: Portland, Oregon

» Sealed Appearance:


» Sealed Power: Starbucks Cup possesses the sole ability to influence others to say the phrase "Without my coffee, I literally can't even!".


» Release Phrase: N/A

» Shikai Appearance: N/A

» Shikai Abilities: N/A


» Bankai Name: N/A

» Bankai Appearance: N/A

» Bankai Abilities: N/A


General Skills
» MPG: 28 (combined highway and city)
» Overall Safety Rating: 5 Stars
» Limited Warranty: 5 years or 60,000 Miles
» Powertrain Limited Warranty: 10 years or 100,000 Miles

» Power: 152 hp @ 5500 RPM
» Torque: 184 ft-lbs @ 2000 RPM
» Engine: Turbocharged


Upgrade links here.