Long Time No See [Saiko/Henrex]

It was hard not to hear of significant changes in the Gotei when they took place. And it eventually hit the ear of Saiko when she heard the likes of Henrex Astilion had been made Captain of the 5th division. It shocked her because she had remembered this man from their time in the demon world upon her old residence of Mount Anael. Through that encounter, she was familiar with him and wanted to see him again, as there was a fair amount of grief from this man the last they met.

Therefore, the woman did not waste time trying to seek him out and travel among the barracks to eventually arrive in his office on a cold, rainy autumn evening. Fortunately for her, she was using her powers as a means to produce a semi-transparent aqua glow around her body to shield the hybrid from the raindrops. After looking around, she'd sense his energy nearby and respectfully knocked on his door.

"I don't mean to disturb you, Henrex, but I got a bit excited and came to see you when I heard you returned to the Soul Society. Is it true you are really returning?"

After coughing a bit and clearing her throat, she continued.

"And sorry if you don't remember, but this is Saiko Mori from the 7th division."

It had taken a little bit, but he had finally gotten settled back in to the Gotei. It was bizarre to be back, and part of him still thought that it was some surreal dream that he had yet to wake from. But, here he was, taking some time out of his day to read more. His attention was taken from the book when he felt something...strangely familiar approaching the office. It was a mixture of Shinigami and Demon, but, he hadn't felt something like that since...

In that moment, his eyes widened as the door opened, recognizing where the familiarity was right as the woman knocked on the door. Saiko Mori, one of the only hybrids like him that he had ever met, back at Mount Anael. Putting his book down and walking to the door, he opened it, greeting Saiko with a warm smile, taking a step to the side, giving her room to slip through the door and come inside. Even if she wasn't getting wet, he wasn't going to just let her stand out in the cold and rain.

"It's nice to see you again, Miss Mori. I've been in Soul Society for a while as a teacher for the academy, but, Murasaki recently asked me to return to the Gotei as the Fifth Division's Captain. I...hadn't known that you returned to Soul Society, much less the Gotei."

Not wasting much time, Saiko did welcome herself in, and a smile came across her face. If nothing else, unlike their prior encounter, a sense of hope was seen behind the Mistress Of Glum's face.

"Thank you for letting me in!"

After taking her seat and hearing Henrex's words, Saiko could see that Murasaki had a knack for recruiting people. So it was quite the sight to see him go from the Academy to being a Captain. First, though, she knew she needed to fill in the gaps regarding her performance.

"So Murasaki recruited you to, huh? She has a tendency to do that kind of thing. I've only got my paradon and became part of the Gotei because she saw the potential in me for one reason or another."

Thinking back to that day, many hellish memories came, but Murasaki was a light she needed. Being so ready to die that day for her sins was something the woman deeply desired at the time. Yet, retrospectively, she knew that was the coward's way out. It was easier just to quit, so to be standing here before Henrex was proof of her hard work.

"Honestly, I was ready to die that day because Shadow Fall had taken so much from me and made me do so many things I can't even speak of in honesty. I don't think I will ever be forgiven for that, but....I have to do what I can."

Looking at Henrex with more intent behind her aqua eyes brought a sense of conviction in her voice. And, with that courage in mind, she'd continued.

"You know that as well, right? You are almost like me. How did you overcome it?"

To see that hope and energy in her warmed his heart. The last time they had met, both of them were anything but positive and hopeful. It was good that neither of them were the same people they were all that time ago. Closing the door as she came in, the latch sliding shut with a quiet click, Henrex followed Saiko, sitting down next to her.

"Never in a thousand years did I think they would want to bring me back to Captaincy. I never thought I would accept an offer for it, either, but...here we are."

Yet, his mind still cast doubt. Perhaps it was only a matter of time before they threw him out again. Perhaps it was just a temporary thing, something that would be torn away from him again without warning. Maybe he really would die alone, nameless, and forgotten. For some reason, that scared him more than anything else. As if instinctually, the half-breed quietly reached over, gently patting her shoulder as a way of reassurance as he let her speak.

"If you've been making strides to try and better yourself, that's all you can do. It's a long process, but, if you're trying your best, then you're already doing well enough, in my eyes. As for overcoming it...I suppose my only answer is sheer stubbornness. I've been like this since the day I was born, though it was dormant until around about six years ago.

His expression shifted, remembering how terrified he was when he first awakened to his demon blood as just another member of the reformed Gotei's Covert Operations Squad, how he had ran away from the Gotei, afraid that they would kill him. His Captain at the time, Kuro, had brought him back, and while he was thankful he didn't report the incident, it had done little to quell his fears.

"I was too stubborn to give in, and it helped that I thankfully had many people in my life that aided me. Were it not for them, I probably wouldn't be here right now. It's pretty likely that I would be dead."

His thoughts turned to Cirno, someone who remained a constant point of positivity, acting something like an older sister to him, to Arianda, the woman who practically saved his life and helped him control the maddening devilry that had suddenly been introduced to him. If it weren't for them, he probably would have been consumed by it all.

They had given him the strength to keep going and to survive, and his own natural stubbornness and undying will had kept him from giving in. It felt like a never-ending battle at times, one that he believed he would never truly win, but, as long as that body of his kept breathing, he would fight. He would not go gentle in that goodnight.

"After what I did, I thought something similar, Henrex. I believed I'd be dead or in prison. Yet, here we both stand. I have to agree with you; it's a nice feeling."

Feeling a sense of relief when he held her shoulder, Saiko smiled as it was a pleasant feeling to speak with someone who shared a similar experience. The two of them were a rare breed indeed when it came to the fact of them being hybrid shinigami with demonic blood in them. It was demented blood in sin that only they could understand. So, she'd continued to engage with a sense of optimism in her voice.

"And our stubbornness is what pushes us against the negative elements of our soul. Admittedly, I didn't have that when I started this journey, but I started understanding the value of having my convictions. Without it, maybe we'd both just be mindless demons."

A chuckle escaped her lips as she really was proud of herself for the changes in herself. That trauma still existed and wouldn't go away overnight, but things were getting better, and Saiko knew the change she and Henrex had would progress over time. So, she'd chime in once more.

"It takes a village sometimes to support people, and I'm glad to have you as someone I can go to in the future. We need each other to keep from turning into monsters. And, in turn, with our blessings, we need to give it back to others who may be in a similar position as ourselves in the future."

With a more intent look in her eye, she added:

"Isn't it the right thing to lead and share our talents with the world to improve it?"

Henrex smiled as Saiko reflected, gently rubbing her shoulder and back idly as she spoke. He really was happy to see her have come this far. From a gloomy, melancholic woman that had seemed to lose every reason to continue, to someone who, albeit still struggling, was making strides and looking to the future with hope. They both had struggled greatly, and they managed to persevere.

"When we drown in a sea of our own emotions, that stubbornness is our saving grace. It's strangely human, despite neither of us being human anymore."

When it came to this accursed blood that ran through their veins, it was an eternal uphill battle. Even with all the power he had amassed in his years, that struggle still felt as real and challenging some days as the first time he awakened to his heritage.

"I'm glad to have someone like you in that regard as well, Saiko. Know that if you ever need anything, whether it be training, help with something, or even if you just want someone to talk to or to pass the time, no matter what it is, my doors will always be open. I'll always try and make some time for you."

It was a mixture of general kindness, extending a helping hand for another like him, as well as a general fondness for the woman. He wanted to see her stay the course, to continue making those strides, and he wanted to make sure that he would be there for her if she fell, to help her get back up. So, as she chimed in one more time, he smiled just a hint wider, nodding softly.

"I don't think I could have said it better myself. With all of this power and experience we have, sharing that with the world, protecting it, and improving it is the best thing that we can do. In a way, power is a selfless concept: The idea that the best way to use it is to benefit others, not one's self."

"I will hold you to that. If I ever need anything, I will let you know without hesitation."

With a nod, Saiko held a sense of agreement with what Henrex said. So, the hybrid would pat his head playfully before adding on further what she needed at this moment.

"Right now, I want a community, friends, and to feel like I have a purpose. So as long as you don't fly away, I'll be happy to keep seeing where we go from here."

Humming cheerfully, the woman was feeling bold as far as her feelings were concerned today. With life so finite, there was no time to speak what was on your mind like the present. So, with that thought in mind, she continued.

"I feel better using my powers for a purpose, for others, and to serve. Being an agent of Shadow Fall and watching my powers bring misery, ruin, and decay to the world made me miserable. My heart still hurts, but I can drown that out when I'm others like you, as I know I'm doing better."

Yeah, even now, that burning static of all her misdeeds, murders, crimes, and all of that still buzzed faintly in her mind. Perhaps it may never go away, but leaning on others, engaging with this world, and getting better over time will lessen it. But, of course, that was just her struggle to deal with. In that same vein, she wanted to know how Henrex wanted to move forward with his troubles. Hence, Saiko spoke:

"And what are your plans for moving forward now that you are back in the Soul Society? I'm kind of curious what your plan is for your division."

All of those things were simple, but important. A purposeless life, nothing would so quickly isolate a man. So, returning the small gesture and giving her a pat on the head, he leaned back slightly in his chair, a little amused, personally at least, at the coincidental choice of phrase "fly away."

"I don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon, I assure you."

Unless something were to come along and manage to end his long, long life, there was no doubt that he would keep going. No matter how bad things got in the past, he was too stubborn to give in and die. The only way he would bid this world farewell would be if someone managed to kill him -- and that was a feat in it of itself. He put a hand on her shoulder again, his expression turning serious for a moment.

"That pain will never truly go away. We both know that. Don't just learn to drown it out, but learn to accept it as a part of you, to live alongside it. There's a balance to be struck."

To drown out something as fundamental as the negative aspects of one's own heart and soul, even as spirits, would only cause those parts to come back with a greater bite, and only caused them to hurt more. He knew that all too well, and he knew that he didn't want someone else, certainly not another hybrid like himself, to end up having that happen to them.

What Saiko said next, though, took him by surprise, and took him aback: asking about his plans of moving forward, now that he was back.

"Mmm...honestly, I'm not really sure. I'm still sort of settling in, and I haven't been a Captain for over three years. Still sort of...getting the rust off. I suppose, one of the things I need to do is branch out more, meet the newer faces, catch up with some people, keep up my teaching at the academy. Part of me has been a little antsy to fight lately, for some reason, so, I might try and knock off the rust, too."

"Good. I don't want to see you fly away with the birds anytime soon."

Laughing merrily to herself, Saiko was amused with her play on words. Of course, it was done in good fun, but her attention started to shift when Henrex began speaking of what he wanted to do for the future. Of course, being that he was a Captain, he would have to step up and put himself in many uncomfortable situations. Everything from dispatching threats, being active among his men, contributing to the soul society, and showing that he was an asset. It would be a hard road, but one Saiko felt Henrex could venture down. So, on that note, the woman nodded and spoke.

"It's great you know what to do, Henrex. You have to bring morale, engage and provide for your squad. You will set the example for the people that follow you, and I believe you can do that if you keep that goal in sight."

Now nudging his shoulder, Saiko winked her eye and added one more thing.

"Oh, and if you are looking for a fight, I know we can always spar or train. Don't think because I'm a tiny little thing; I can't pack a punch."

She absolutely was making these comments on purpose. He found himself joining in the laughter as he reached over, gently ruffling her hair and patting her head. He was glad she was enjoying herself, though, and that she was comfortable around him. That was all he could ask for when he was in the presence of others.

"It's a lot to do, but, that's a Captain's work for you. I only hope that I can do it well enough, so that I can inspire those around me to do their best, and as well as hope to use my own power and skills to give others the power to reach the stars."

He smiled, returning the nudge. He could sense that she was anything but weak. Even if she were, training and practice to get the rust off for him, as well as to help her improve was something he would welcome without hesitation.

"I'll definitely take you up on that offer. There isn't much left to train for these days for me, but to spar and keep myself in shape is something I will hardly turn down."

There wasn't much growth left for him these days, it seemed. He could tell there was a bottleneck, even with his currently level of power. Perhaps there were a few things left for him to sharpen and improve on, but, he could tell that there was a limit fast approaching.

The thought was unnerving, to finally reach some kind of limit. He felt weaker than he had years before, but, there was nothing he could really do about it. Still, he would try to break those limits, to see if there was anything beyond this ceiling of power. Though he had changed in these years, one thing still held firm in his heart -- to reach the apex of power, to be able to stand alone as a pillar of strength to protect those he loved from every threat he could face. To be a man that stopped the monsters.

Perhaps, when he had reached that limit, he could finally rest.

Maybe, even, one day, with a family. He'd had so many failed relationships, so that idea was another pipe dream, but, perhaps. Perhaps one day, he would finally be able to rest, and let those who come after him take his place, knowing that the world would be in good hands.