Centuries Of Failure [WW4 Event]

With eyes that were bloodshot, a heart ready to rupture, skin pale as the flesh of the dead and breathing labored; alone in this fragile state did one of the supposed strongest beings in the world sit in an unmarked ship far above the earth's stratosphere above Japan. The anticipation of World War Four brought some with hope, others with anger, some with sorrow and for the Executive of The Lux Orior -- Fear. Fear was the only thing running through his mind as intense visions of his former failures started coursing through his minds like a painful barrage of regret, anxiety, and terror.

There were so many millions if not, billions of people that he had let down in the ashes of WW3. Thinking back to the seas of lifeless bodies, cities that were once the beacon of technology slain to ruin and the overwhelming sense of helpless that comes with watching a world you once called home become consumed in hell is nothing less but horrifying. To watch as your family, friends and all that you knew become reduced to nothing brings forth a sickening feeling in the gut that makes you want to vomit when remembering that such a tragedy is about to befall you again.

With recollections of the Australian Conflict running through The Yuudeshi's mind, the destabilization of the earth's wellbeing was all that he could have attained in a war he thought would bring the planet to a closer state of being peaceful and safe. It didn't matter how much blood he shed, how hard he worked or the amount of good intention he had in his heart; every action that he took ever since the mark of World War Three resulted in more grief, pain and hardship for himself, those who rely on him and the planet as a whole.

So what chance in hell did he have to try and alter the tides in a repeat of that same cataclysmic event which threw this world into this state of utter disrepair to begin with?

Tears of frustration tried to break way through the male's eyes as he clenched the cold steel floors all around him. He didn't want to feel this sense of powerlessness, this aura of failure and total dread bleeding in his heart. The man was a leader to so many people that looked up to him, a person who had invested a great deal in the past to the efforts of bettering the planet and was held in a high enough regard to lead the forefront of earth's strongest organized force.

Yet -- it wasn't enough to break through this veil of anguish and terror in his heart. And it is for these reasons that The Yuudeshi Network sealed the male in this isolated space. It was extracting and utilizing the resources of his mind and body to begin the next wave of attacks, but his mind was far too unsteady to wield the immense and unforeseen weight of its imaginative properties. It all came down to having a stronger sense of personal reality which was solid, steady and filled with a sense of belief that its personal reality could influence the world in a positive way. Ergo, if Shadin lacked this crucial element to attain his power, he was nothing more than a dangerous cripple which could hamper the efforts to further these war efforts rather than help.

And it is for this reason why in the vast emptiness of empty space did such a loathsome energy begin to bleed out into the world. As, if one were to look above the skies now in Japan, all they would see is a shimmering white light which represented the powers of the lone Yuudeshi signaling its isolated call to whoever would listen. Perhaps it was a sign of help, maybe it was a cry for attention; but the man honestly did not have an iota of what to do next. He knew he held so much potential and power, but every time he tried to live up to it -- it was all failure.

So why act?

Why summon his power?

Why bother showing his face?

It was just going to be a repeat of everything being lost to him in this world. And perhaps it was selfish, perhaps it was cowardly, but his mind was so consumed by this grief that it couldn't work through and process a reality where everything was ok -- and that made any and all attempts to fix this planet so pointless. And thus, with this logic, he couldn't raise his blade. How could he if he knew in his heart of hearts that he was -- weak and scared?

Reflecting the state of his ruptured mind and heart, the Yuudeshi then began to vomit up a pool of blood as his imaginative powers reacted to his negative reality. His body was beginning to break down, falter and sicken from his shattered sense of being. If one were to view him now, they'd see that his bright clothing was raddled in crimson stains as his body was leaking fluids all throughout the gray-lfeliess floor around him. A hole near the center of his heart was now beginning to open to otherwise reflect this void of inner belief, while the forehead of the Yuudeshi bled profusely and his breathing began labored.

With his hand held tightly across his chest, the male tried to think of a way out of his mess -- but nothing was coming. Only waves of blinding pain surged in his body as he could feel his grip on himself becoming weaker, weaker and weaker as this reality of powerlessness entered into his mind. And as the seeds of failure rooted themselves in his personal reality, The Yuudeshi almost resigned himself to this fate of death. As, if nothing else, perhaps death could allow himself a way to attone for all the mistakes he has made. As his life for these past two hundred years -- has been nothing but a waste.

What a twist, at this point war was inevitable. Chifuyu was no fool and it was on the horizon, it was merely a matter of planning and preparing whilst she still had time. Even if she designed plans to have fall backs and work simultaneously there was always room for error, unforeseen variables that would appear. That was what was probably her greatest fear, the ignorance or inability to see the whole picture. Had that own mistake, no incompetence been taken into account then maybe she would've tried harder and someone she loved deeply wouldn't have died.

Like a beacon in the sky Chifuyu answered, not appearing immediately. In time, she didn't teleport or utilise all of her power to arrive and give her father the attention he sought but it was also a matter of her being preoccupied, so what was appearing was a body with little to no energy but her own will in the husk of a clone body.

"Is this how you want to leave this Earth?"

Having entered into this space Chifuyu's own appearance was quite basic yet her presence had its own aura different from his personal reality. It was a realistically a simple question she had posed to her father but it had a challenging tone. She had never experienced the wake of previous wars, the degradation. She was just born into this broken world but she resolved to fix it - no matter how much of herself she had to give up.

"Killing yourself won't accomplish anything, it'll just leave everyone in a worse position. Me especially."

Speaking quite matter of fact about the situation she switched her tact, even though she felt that speaking in her normally flat way would have more impact but comforting would probably help. As bad as she thought she was at it and so she approached the defeated figure of one of the strongest men on the planet and gently ran her hand through his hair of someone she cared about - like Azure, this was a man she didn't want to die.

Such a small amount of those there were when she thought about it. But what could she say to make it better or hurt less.

"You're just one person... It's not your fault."

She spoke in sync with a thought, closing her eyes while wondering if putting her faith in that thought was the best idea. Had that aspect of her failed her yet? No. But was it right of her to rely on it...

The sounds of explosions and yells that cling to life which scatter across a battlefield were millions of miles away from the perception of the broken male. The only thing which echoed in this void of space was the labored breathing of The Yuudeshi and the footsteps of his daughter. He had not expected her to arrive at this place, so further shame only grew upon his face in the form of a grimace as his bloodied gaze caught sight of her figure as his body continued to release more of these crimson fluids on to the floor.

"No....how could I want to leave like this?"

Those pained words exited in the form of a raspy voice which uttered itself meekly throughout the empty room between the two. All the while, the feeling of blades slashing against his throat washed over the elder Yuudeshi as he tried to speak, but he knew he could not lie to one of his daughters. No matter if the greater part of him wanted to disappear and die from this miserable reality, staring someone you love in the face could not allow one's self to be reduced to nothing. So, if out of his faint love did his personal reality kept itself attune to this existence as he felt the heartbeat of his dear daughter. He owed that to her, at least.

"...I understand, but I can't......."

Soon his vision filled with a sea of red, and that is when the male threw up another chunk of scarlet fluids from his mouth as he began to almost choke on his own vital essence. This sense of loss within his heart was growing far too much for him to bare as his reality became more disjointed and paralyzed. Drifting through the centuries, all Shadin really had to show it was a city that was on it's way to being ruins, a mountain of bodies slain for nothing and the ashes of his own organization in ruins. It felt as if the harder he tried, the more failure chained his spirits. So what logic was there to fight if continued strife brought little relief?

"No matter the war, I've witnessed every action I make end in failure ever since that day when World War Three first started. For centuries I've fought against this, but what progress have I truly made?"

At this moment, he honestly couldn't think of a thing he has done which has swayed the planet toward being altered back its pristine state. Back in its prime era of peace in a time where he could call himself, it's protector and hero. Just how far had that vision of his past been eradicated from his grasp? Those sunny days, those jovial times and that youthful optimism alluded him. The raging flare of his younger self was but a distant memory to him as he kept reimagining what his younger form would think of him in this state.

"No matter what I try, I'm powerless. So I'm tired......so very tired, Chifuyu."

As much as it hurt to admit that, he could not give her any false illusions of grandeur about his state of mind. And it hurt him so much to tell her this; so much so that it ignited a sense of burning from his eyes as they bled their scarlet tears. The angelic essence which flowed in him could not sustain his existence in this world if he continued to go against his element of diligence Yet, he could not see a way out of all of this that ended well for himself, the planet or the others he cared for. It was all a black void which ended in more tragedy, pain, carnage, and death for many centuries to come.

So why should one subject themselves to such torture? He had given this planet everything he had to give and it still wasn't enough. He sacrificed his integrity, love, purity, ego, time, money, body and all of his soul to the gods themselves -- yet it still amounted to nothing. Absolutely nothing. In fact, there were others on the planet doing more than he could ever dream of in such a short amount of time. This new generation of protectors really did not need him in his mind, as he was beginning to understand he was nothing more than a relic of the past, and these sentiments bled out in his aura as it was hard for Chifiyu not to pick up on these telepathic emotions which seeped into her mind.

"The instant I begin meddling, all that happens is punishment from the divine and more suffering is birthed into this world. I've had my time to shine, my opportunity to try and many chances to shape this planet....and my karma has come to reap me."

Every word was a strain, but he spoke them anyway as he fell into the arms of his daughter. As she ran her soft fingers through his hair, the Yuudeshi gave her a weak embrace as his body soon began to become so cold to the touch. His ego, his persona, his will; they all were so exhausted that he sincerely could not see a way to tap into that greatness which once burned like the damning flare of the sun itself.

"I understand I'm one person.....but I've failed as a leader. The only thing I can do now is give my life to others and let the next generation do what they may with my ashes....I've failed."