All my Life to Live [Giselle, Candice]

The mood in the Catnipp manor had been rather dry of late, the cause of which was certainly no secret to both Candice and Giselle. There had been many breakups in Candi's tumultuous life, admittedly very few of them leaving her in the lurch but enough that it was not the first time such a terrible thing had happened. She was capable of looking after herself and equally capable of just getting under someone else and forgetting about all those wasted nights and all that investment come to nothing. But despite herself, she hadn't. Something had gotten stuck, and it clung to her only tighter as the days rolled by.

She travelled, made her appearances, and did her duties and errands like the darling daughter her parents wanted her to be, but all was not well with the blonde bombshell. This was something that the Candice of yesterday would have taken straight to Giselle, her little confidant and crutch, and yet the other woman felt no less distant than Ehefra was. They shared a house and yet acted like strangers.

It was not all too hard to track her down, though. In times of undue stress, she was a creature of habit. If there was work to be done, professional work, then she was either in one of the studies or strutting around the garden like a woman on a mission. If there wasn't, then she was in the gym or out on the racing track. Today, like many days, it was gym day. Dressed down in sportswear, hair up in a loose ponytail, she had just finished a session on the treadmill when the approaching footfalls alerted her to the presence of an intruder in her midst. Green eyes darted in Giselle's direction, silently waiting for her to offer anything more than a passing glance.

Whether she heard that mumbling comment or not, there was no immediate reaction from the blonde as she seemed quite content to let Giselle go about her day. Being in the spotlight was her nine-to-five so the prolonged stare washed over her just like the rest did, and for a moment she considered simply leaving her to it. This was a communal space, after all, and they both needed to work on their physical fitness sometimes. Only when the smoothie was produced did she return her gaze to the woman, the slosh of the liquid as it slid across the bench alerting her to the intended receiver.

With a huff and a puff, she let down her hair and fluffed it out a little with one hand. The kinks from having been pulled into a ponytail remained, but soon the blonde fringe returned to shield her gaze from that of the once-zombie. Approaching, she did not vocalise her consent yet but took a seat at the other side of the drink and waited patiently.

If Giselle was scoping for a reaction then she would have to do a little better than that. But it also hadn't prompted her to storm off in a fit, so as far as Candice went that could be considered progress.

Picking up the smoothie, Candice let it rest in her lap as her hands folded atop it and she settled in to listen. It would not be long before that grip grew tighter though, as Giselle began to pull and pick at what had been eating at her. It was never going to be an easy conversation to have, but there was something about her tone that just managed to get under her skin. How casual she was about herself, how quick she was to throw the blame at Ehefra's feet now that she was no longer around.

"So why is leaving me a mistake? You don't exactly seem thrilled to be here."

Her tone was a little shriller than she would have liked, betraying her emotions as they ran wild beneath the surface, but to have it all just drop on her out of the blue after all that waiting and build-up made a girl tense. No small part of her wanted to cry and scream and let the world feel her wrath, but then that would be it and everything for nought. Years of her life had been committed to that woman, and she had thrown it back in her face for the sake of her conscience. If this one walked too then at least she could just wipe the slate clean and move on, instead they were here, dragging through dirty laundry whilst she danced around her like a kitten walking on egg shells.

Candi did not rise to meet Giselle as she loomed over her, content to remain on the bench for the moment and peer at the drink she had been given. Of course, the view from above was perhaps more envious even than the view from below, but if this was her chance to steal a glimpse then Candice seemed to allow it. She huffed at the continued mention of Ehefra, seeming to prefer to treat the matter like the woman had simply never existed and yet that ignorance was denied.

"Then why didn't you care before? Why did you let things go so far? If you wanted me all to yourself then why did you simply accept that I was also getting it somewhere else?"

It was true, she had expected there to be hell to pay when she had originally admitted it right after it first happened. Had that been her cry for help, and it had landed on deaf ears, galvanised her worse tendencies and set up this whole disaster in the making? Unlikely. She was not the type to show her weakness. But that did not make what she had done righteous. It should have been Giselle’s chance to set her straight; to show her how this relationship was going to be, and yet she had left the door open.

There was little that Candi could do but sit there and let Giselle unload her feelings onto her. It was hardly the first time, yet usually it felt more lustful than this. This was, in so many ways, new and that was quite scary really. But the Thunderqueen had cleansed her of fear, galvanised her heart against any such weakness or vulnerability, so she should have been quite unfazed by all that cutting honesty. She wasn’t, she knew deep down that it all meant something, but remained adamantly determined not to show it.

There was no constant commentary, though, as Candi sat there in silence and let Giselle reach her conclusion without interrupting. The Heiress who could talk anyone’s head off if given half the opportunity was rendered quite speechless, overwhelmed by all that was being thrust upon her and stunned by her own fragility. Her partner professed to be the idiot and yet she was the one who understood them far better, who had lost every part of herself and yet pushed to find a new one, that wished more than anything to break those who had hurt them. It had taken her a while to arrive at this conclusion, or perhaps to work up the courage to open that vault, but at least she had the balls to say it.

“I don’t want to kill her, Z, or make her a pet and force her to stay. That might give her the illusion that she ever mattered. She was just using me anyway, so I hope that she got all that she wanted out of it.”

Candice believed that, her eyes did not lie, but she was also entirely unused to the idea that people would want to spend time with her for any reason other than wanting to be around her for vanity’s sake. That was all she had ever been to anyone, a trophy to be held onto for a while and discarded when something shinier came along. Giselle had already forced her to consider the possibility that someone might actually like her for her, and she had tried to accept that, but the truth was that she couldn’t just believe that. It wasn’t as easy as just flipping a switch and deciding to care, it was a fundamental change to her entire being, and she didn’t know what Candice Catnipp would be like if she accepted that fact. Better, worse, something different or entirely the same? It all made her pretty, blonde head spin.