School House Blues(Yuzuru/Hiroe)

Yuzuru tensed up as she pulled on his cheek, but was quite happy that he had at least put her at ease a little bit. Still, he would have to get better at this whole pep talking thing if he was going to be someone that could be relied on in situations like this. He would have to get a self-help book from the Rukongai he wagered. Something that could help him at least obtain some level of skill in talking with other people and conveying his thoughts in an accurate manner.

And then she asked the question. For a long time, Yuzuru had kept to himself about what had happened, and why he had chosen this lifestyle over the one his parents had wanted for him. In truth, it would have been easy to just pick up his guitar or play piano or any instrument for that matter, but he had chosen the difficult path. In a way chasing after his older brother who had shown him that there were things outside of music, a whole vibrant world filled with people, and things to do.

"Well...its a bit difficult to talk about, but since you are my friend, I guess I can tell you."

Yuzuru said, accepting that it would be fine to share with her a little bit more about himself than just what she already knew. Still, he doubted this would be something she would enjoy to hear, after all it was kind of a grim story.

"When I was younger my family kind of locked me up and threw away the key in a way. They wanted me to be a musician because I had the talent to be even greater than them, but I wasn't the first child of my parents. No, that distinction belonged to my brother Hajime."

Yuzuru looked up, a smile on his face as he remembered his brother, and all the stuff they had done behind his parents back outside of the compound.

"He had no musical aptitude what so ever, so they kicked him out of the compound when I was really young. Still, he was an amazing older brother, and would come back to the compound on occasion to bust me out for a bit so I could see the outside world. He taught me a lot about the world outside of music and even more about what it meant to be a shinigami."

He smiled even wider remembering the time his brother let him see him practice his swinging and the grace with his blade was a sight to behold. He remembered his first big musical hit was based on that moment. He had never told his parents about that as he bet they would have flipped and probably locked him either further away in the compound so that he would have never seen the light of day again.

"My brother was amazing, he was a model shinigami, and because of him I secretly aspired to be like him. One day though..."

The smile was gone at this point, a large scowl coming over Yuzuru's face as he remembered the house call that had been made. The men standing on their doorstep telling them about Hajime's death on patrol and he remembered the unfazed look on his parent's face, a look that showed not a single care in the world that their first born son had died. Sure they held a ceremony to honor his passing, but the real reason for that was the concert after, to make money, and little else. Music was their life, their sole passion, and to him they were nothing more than emotionless monsters pretending to be people.

Sure, he had gained his love of music from them, and he loved to create and play music, but he despised his parents.

"One day on patrol, my brother went out, and never came back. The official report was that of a Hollow attack, because of him a couple of shinigami managed to escape as he stood his ground to cover their backs, but if only they had his. If only...I had been there maybe..."

Yuzuru cleared his throat a bit and then looked over at Hiroe.

"So, I decided to become a Shinigami...my parents hated that and cut me off from the family fortune, which is why I'm working for money through music, but I don't mind that. I just want to live up to the image of my brother and be a shinigami like him."

Listening to Yuzuru's history in silent, Hiroe's expression went through a few progressions; dancing between visible disgust in regards to his parents, to visible sympathy for the life he and his brother endured, and even a tinge of sadness at hearing that Hajime died sacrificing his life to protect his fellow men. Hiroe had no particular grasp of Yuzuru as a person. He always felt so guarded, so afraid to step out of his shell and interact with others. Coming from a background like that, there was no question he'd be... shaken up in some form of another.

What type of bastard parents locked their kid away like a slave just to live up to some name? She'd certainly have to show him what it felt like to be around good and caring parents one day. Her life was fairly simplistic, but her parents allowed her to live her life however she saw fit, presenting her with a treasure chest of possibilities. If this whole dream of reaching the Gotei failed, she was allowed to inherit the shop. If it succeeded, she was still allowed to inherit the shop.

"Your parents are the worst," she noted, somewhat venomously. Sighing softly, she rubbed the back of her head before gazing toward him.

"Sorry... I didn't mean for that to slip out. I'm sorry you lost your brother... but I admire that you want to make him proud. I can't speak for the dead... and yet, I think he'd be quite proud of the man sitting beside me right now, helping out his fellow classmate so she doesn't slip into a severe spell of self-doubt. I think you'll reach that goal in no time. Of course, in order for you to do that, you just have to start leaning to be brave and step out a little, you know? Not think so much about others, and believe in yourself. I'll do the same myself, too. Just like you told me."

"They aren't winning any parent of the year awards, if I'm being honest."

Yuzuru said, trying to joke a bit, and almost completely out of character in a way. For the first time, he had told someone about his home life, and his brother. It was a weird feeling of being free from a lot of the burden that had been weighing him down for a while. The secret he had to keep, the quiet nature of why he was here at the academy, and choosing to pursue this life over the other that his parents had laid out before him. It had been difficult to go through with what he had wanted to do, but he was still at peace with his decision.

"Thanks...though I doubt he would be too happy that I haven't found a way to balance it all out."

Yuzuru nodded his head a bit, thankful that Hiroe was trying to cheer him on a bit, even if he wasn't one hundred percent sure that everything she was saying was true. He really didn't have the ability to interact with his peers the way that she did, he lacked the charisma that she had, but more than that he lacked the real world knowledge.

"Also, I doubt that I will be stepping up, and talking to everyone like you do. I don't really...interact well with others as you can tell."

He said, letting out an audible sigh.

There he was, doubting himself again. As much as she would've raised her hand towards the tall male and pinched his cheek, she had now gained a greater clarity as to why he felt that way. Even so, if there engaging in conversations about self-betterment, there was no way in the world she'd simply allow him to fade into the depths of those thoughts. Who the hell did he think he was, anyway? Give her inspirational words and crawl back into his scaredy-cat hole? Nah. He was in the Hiroe domain now. She didn't even care about her own doubts at the moment anymore. Reaching a hand forward, she pouted pulling at his cheek anyway. It was a painful pinch, too. Just to drive home her next point.

"Doubt doesn't solve any problem. That's your issue, Yuzuru. You're a talented man. You have a good heart in spite of all that life has thrown your way... and you still doubt. Half of my girlfriends talk about how cute you look on the eyes. There is no one to stop you, but you.. I'm honored that you view me as a friend, but I believe you can have so much more..."

She gazed away, sighing softly as she her fingers remained pressed against his cheek.

"You'll probably graduate before I do. So why beat yourself up? Didn't you just tell me it's not about the pace so as long as you keep going? Why can't you try, huh?"

Sure, the female eye did tend to wander a bit toward him from time to time, not that it mattered much to him as he was there to study, and not to hook up with someone at first glance. The painful pinch from Hiroe made him grimace a bit and he grabbed a hold of her hand, holding it as delicately as he could.

"Can we stop with the pinching of my face...I don't want more of my peers to run away from me with the facial scar you are trying to give me."

Another joke, but this time with a tad bit of seriousness behind it. While he did appreciate her trying to pull him out of his own doubts, he was not a fan of pain, and right now her pinching was edging close to an eight on his pain meter. Still, she was right that it wasn't about the pace, but about accomplishing the goal. Still, it would be extremely hard for himself to find time to develop the necessary social skills as to interact with the other students. He supposed he could practice at school or try to strike up a conversation with others. Though to be honest? He really didn't have any idea of what sort of subject was exciting for people around his age.

He had never really taken time to learn the in's and out's of such matters and had spent a lot of his time developing his music and learning the shinigami methods. Now he was kind of upset with himself that he hadn't tried to at least in passing overhear conversations to learn a bit about the new generation. Still, there was a good solution to all this, he supposed.

Turning to look at Hiroe, still holding her hand, and looking at her as calmly as he could he would speak with a certain tone that belayed a desire to improve.

"Will you help me learn how to speak with others?"

It was a simple question, but one that came deep down from Yuzuru's very soul. If he was to improve as a composer, perhaps he needed more insight into proper relationships, or even just have normal conversations with people. That was it! Perhaps the best way to improve as a musician, a person, and as a shinigami was to form bonds and learn more about his surroundings. It was at that moment that Yuzuru realized he had been holding Hiroe's hand for quite a while and it could be skewed as awkward with the way he was staring at her while doing so. He let go of her hand, his face turning a bit red as he tried to hide his face.

Hiroe's pout grew visibly more apparent as she glared at him. It served him right. She understood the reason behind his reasons to doubt himself. Whose self-esteem wouldn't be ground into dust living under his parent's piss-poor environment of fear. A household filled with intimidation. Hiroe couldn't even entertain the thought of living a hellish life like that, where the only way you could receive love is through your talent. Sighing softly, she gazed at him with a curious look in her eyes as he grabbed her hand. No one liked being pinched, so that particular act didn't elicit a great deal of surprise in the raven-haired woman's expression.

The way he held her hand and gazed into her eyes, though? A shade of red quickly filled her pale cheeks. She would have pulled her hand away, but he turned away himself as if recognizing his actions at the same moment she did. Why did he have to make it feel so awkward!? Slamming a fist against his shoulder, she pouted, the blush still apparent in her face as she turned to the side with arms crossed.

"O-of course I'll help you! Just don't go grabbing my hand like that again. Trying to be confident already, huh? Holding a woman's hand like we're a couple or something? I should pinch you again, but I'll refrain."

Her hit to his shoulder barely fazed the larger Yuzuru, who didn't even budge from the her attempted physical assault. Yuzuru was just built different, but still he got the general gist of why she was upset. After all, he was an awkward guy, and she was one of the most attractive ladies in the entire school, maybe even the whole of soul society. Still, he felt happy that she was willing to help him become better at relaying his emotions and communicating with others. Something that he was surely going to need if he planned on joining the gotei and even graduating from the academy at all.

"Thank you, Hiroe...I will stop holding your hand now."

Yuzuru added rather awkwardly as he let go of her hand and brought it up to the back of his head, scratching it in confusion, and a bit of embarrassment. After all, he had clearly embarrassed her as her face was a shade of pink so it was clear he would be embarrassed too. Still, he didn't want her to get the wrong idea of him, and that he was some kind of guy that went around holding pretty women's hands out of the blue. Still, the idea of him and her being a couple didn't seem possible in any way shape or form. She was after all, a stunning woman that made people turn heads when she entered the room in the best possible way, and he was a guy who made people turn their heads in the worst possible way. He always looked intimidating and always seemed to be grimacing in some way.

It wasn't his fault that genetics had gifted him with his looks, but what could he do about it? Its not like people could change their appearances entirely overnight, it just didn't work like that, and while he had been fine with how he looked upon entering the academy, it had only isolated him from his peers. People were too scared of his size and appearance to get close, luckily Hiroe had not been like that, and had learned about who he truly was. That is when a weird smile crept across his face, it looked rather awkward and so he brought up one of his hands to try to hide it.

"So...how do I become better at interacting with people."

He said while trying to hide his smile.

Yuzuru was a dork. An awkward, somewhat charming dork, charming in the sense of clearly possessing good intention, a dork for his humorous failures. Hiroe couldn't be annoyed with him for too long. She wanted to bully him, though, but she held that off for now. He really was trying his best. She couldn't fault him for that. Sighing softly, she would raise her hand forward, pulling his hands away from his mouth. She'd press his nose a bit before chuckling. Well, the first step was not trying to hide behind anything. Keep the hands away. Let that smile show. That is what she felt would be the first essential step to fixing the awkwardness that dominated his spirits.

"Well, the first step is to... stop trying to hide anything unless you need to. You're smiling, right? Stare at me for a minute and smile. Don't put your hands up to hide. Don't turn away. Just look at me without trying to turn away, got it? If you're ever gonna get a girlfriend, this part is key. Women love confidence, ya know? If I were into girls, they'd be all over me."

She wanted to see his smile? It was true that he really didn't smile too often and he supposed that the best way to display his emotions was to show them in a more physical sense. What she said did ring quite true, but he didn't know he would ever be able to land a girlfriend. There were not many women out there that could put up with his non-sense, but he supposed that if he tried his best maybe he could find somebody he could spend his time with in some way shape or form.

"Alright."

Yuzuru said, dropping his hand from his face, and turning to stare directly into Hiroe's eyes. It felt extremely awkward doing this, but he wanted to do what she said. If not to prove to himself that he could do it, then to try to meet his peer's expectations of him. She said he had a certain appeal and maybe if he tried to use that a bit, maybe he could make more friends? It was confusing for him as he didn't one hundred percent understand what she meant by it, but he decided to give it his all.

"How's this?"

He said, still smiling, and staring into her yellow eyes as his face continued to grow flush from the general proximity he was from her.

Thousands of gremlin thoughts circled through Hiroe's mind but she kept them at bay, gazing at Yuzuru as she tilted her head, wondering what was going through his mind. This was clearly territory for him that had went hitherto unexplored. Was he ready to break or was he maintaining the composure she commanded him to feel. True mysteries. She winked softly at him to see if she could break his composure, never turning away once. Hiroe had to test him to see if he wouldn't fold at the glimpse of others being confident in his presence, of those who would want to approach him and not run away at the sight of him, contrary to his own opinion. Her gaze remained as it was, confident and unwavering. Bright. Golden eyes gazing into his own.

"So good, so far. Little longer, now."