A Path Worth Traveling?

Strong mentality? That’s what Ulv always pushes down her throat. That’s how everyone who’s been trying to help her has been saying. To be honest, she’s a bit tired of the same advice over and over. And, each individual always has different methods of going about it: Ulv and her kinky training, Arianda and trying to use sexual stimulation to calm it down, even Claire had some strange seductiveness about her when Elyss met the woman. Why has every person who’s tried to help her also tried to make her as uncomfortable in her pants as possible? She just wants an understanding of herself; not an understanding of her sexual preference.

Is that why she’s here? Frustration? Ulv said no after putting her through some strange situations. Elyss can’t lie and say none of it has done anything, but she feels that at this rate, she’d not see any progress till the year is over, and taking that much time just to control this little bit of anger seems insatiable to her desires. This may be a big mistake, but Elyss feels it’d be something that’d help her train herself in controlling her anger. Outside help is great, but she feels she needs to take a step on her own.

At least Henrex clarified that her ideas on why she’s here aren’t bogus and makes sense if not dangerous. Her eyes move the sudden materialization next to the captain. She didn’t look shocked, but she does raise a brow. Inner spirit? So, that’s how it supposedly works? Zanpakutos…

“An idea?”

She tilts her head a bit seeing him get a bit strange for some reason, but when he voices his thoughts, Elyss is quick to shake her head and shut down such a thing.

“That won’t work out well. It’s not just something I can shut off or on like that. I can’t just call on it without stimuli. It’s a reaction to stress, I think. Like, when my blood starts pumping faster, I can feel my mind start seeing things differently. I can usually reem it back in before it gets out of hand, but if I’m in the middle of something, and there’s no backing out, it’s pretty much impossible for me to stop that spiral into the anger that injures others. That is why I am here. Maybe if I have a manifestation like you do, it can tell me why I’m like this. But, I can’t show you much unless we’re in a fight or something.”

She looks to the side and rubs the back of her head feeling a bit out of place with her words. Should she really be talking to a captain like this? She feels she’s being disrespectful somehow.