Impenetrable Ignorance: Tulpa Arc - Part One [Ibiki/Mirja]

Ibiki....she had accepted Mirja's love, and that, was so much more precious than anything else in the world. Tears filled her eyes even as she led on the floor, bleeding and broken. Something inside her cracked even more, and she felt despite Ibiki's words, this was were she was gonig to die. Soul cracked wide open by a walking grudge. But, there were worse ways to die than by the encouragement of a woman she valued more than most in the world. Probably more than any, at this current moment. But fate was not going to allow her to pass on just yet, as she was suddenly filled with a deep, throbbing energy that cooled her body to the point of perfect. That exact point that lay on the precipise of too hot - which for Mirja was pretty cold, to most people - and too cold. It was glorious.

The words, run such a truth in her. Not to run from the abyss of her mind, which she had done for so long. But to run towards it. To confront it. To stand against the tide of blood and death that she had left in her wake and proclaim that she would no longer be controlled by it, no longer would she hide in fear of who she was. Of what she was. And with that, the feeling inside her, the stange wall, shattered entirely, smashed by a fist of positive energy gifted by a woman who meant more to her than even Mirja could imagine.

And on the other side of the wall, there was a deep rumbling. Mirja recognized the rumble immidiately, and her state of mind went a bit crazy, the link with Ibiki allowing the Devil Girl to hear the same rumbling, and the conversation that followed.
'You can finally hear me, again' said a voice. A deep, powerful voice, one that implied great might, but also great comfort. 'Despair held me at bay, so thick and heavy were your feelings. But they have finally broken and I can be at your side again. Perhaps' The Voice, seemed as if it had not quite decided if it was going to return.

'Once, long ago, you turned your back on all that I can be out of fear. The power I offered scared you, and you did not wish to kill another innocent man with strength that you could not control. And so I was cursed to be less than half of what I am. But now! Now you have the chance to know me for who I truly am! My claws are not tools of destruction. They are not for slaughter, or the theft of life! Like a mother defending her cubs, my claws draw from a steadfast heart! They exist to protect that which you most value in this world! If you can accept all that I am, then roar! Scream to the world you denial of fear!'

It was certainly a pretty speech, and the words were reinforced by the fact that they were spoken by a voice that sounded as if it has swollowed a massive bass speaker. And with Ibiki's energy, she could truly feel as if there was a chance for her. As if accepting all that it could be, was within her grasp. And so she rose from the ground and with all her heart screamed to the heavens themselves.

"BEOWULF!"


Sensing that something bad was going down, Tulpa-Mirja rushed in just as there was an explosion of light and pure force. A sound of ripping, and splattering blood followed and the Tulpa-Mirja retreated, bleeding profusely from several deep claw-marks in it's gut.

'although those bracelets do seem to be surpressing a fair bit of myself. Ignore the 'know me for who I truly am' part for now' Beowulf's voice boomed. It was strange, to hear a voice that powerful, sound awkward. It made Mirja smile. Gods, when was the last time she had truly smiled? For an actual reason, not simply because a smile was another tool.

"I'm sorry. I am sorry I brought you into this world, I am sorry you have to exist, and I am sorry that I feel such that you can exist in the first place. I want to be your friend, but I also know what you are, and the whole concept of friendship is not something you can even acknowledge the existance off. There is nothing you can understand, except hatred, and anger, and fury and disgust. And the best ways to kill someone" She flexed her hands, and glowing white claws blossomed from them, her palm covered in what looked to be the paws of a giant bear. "There is nothing I can do except destroy you"

She then looked to Ibiki, and gave the Devil Girl a look of such, gratitude.
"But I do thank you. You gave me something clear and solid to look in the eye of, and know the depth of how I am. And with that, I can know what I am up against, and with that knowledge, I can know how to deal with it in time. And I know this is a monologue because you don't even understand language and I could speak entirely in pig latin and it would mean just as much to you but monologues exist for a reason" Mirja went a little off course at the end, but she always had trouble with her confidence after a battle turned in her favour.

The Tulpa seemed to take offense at that, and with a scream of it's own, Reiatsu exploded from it, so thick and heavy that, even with Beowulf's help, standing up became hard for Mirja, weakend by the Bonds as she was. But there was something in that Reiatsu that was so familiar.

"It has a hollow?!" Mirja exclaimed, before looking to Ibiki. "Ibiki! It's gone mad! You need to get out of here, I don't know what it will do in this state! I don't want you to get-" Mirja was cut off by a punch of such speed and power, had Beowulf not pulled his claws up to guard Mirja's head, that would have been the end. Physics went mental as a chillingly cold fog sprung up from the rapid depressurization of the vapor between the Tulpa and Mirja. Sight was gone and all that remained was the tremendous, mountianous hollowfied Reiatsu of the Tulpa, that had lost whatever small degree of reason it once possessed, and was now riding the most powerful - and most crippling - techniques Mirja possessed. The Reiatsu was incredibly unstable, and if the monster was a reflection of Mirja, it gave quite an insight into the stability of not just Mirja's mind, but her very soul.

Mirja - the real Mirja - felt her arms shatter from the punch. Reinforced as they were by Beowulf, they didn't explode, but she was blasted off her feet and sent with an excruciating impact with the ground. The table was currently turning so dramatically it's stand was glowing red hot from the friction of it's movement. it seemed this was what she got for grandstanding and not just finishing it when she had the chance....

Wholeness. That is something which resonated within the essence of Ibiki as Mirja reunited with lost portions of her spirit. To be able to command, guide and then direct people towards being a stronger version of themselves is what a capable leader had the capacity to do. So, this made a smile as tender as the touch of a new borns skin wash over the face of The Devil Shinigami as she witnessed the scene taking place before her.

While there were no real words to say due to the fact that Ibiki did not see it as her business to meddle in the affairs of someone else's inner world and essence, the relaxed expression, body language and aura of the woman's body indicated that she was indeed pleased with her being able to push through the hardships that came her way to progress this far. If Mrija could continue to do that, then there was no reason for Ibiki not to lose hope in her.

"There really is no need for thanks. Thank me and yourself by making this constant and facing these unpleasant feelings head on every time. You can only waste my gratitude by doing nothing with it."

After all -- the job wasn't even done. That creature was still there. And if that monster of her negativism still existed, then this task of gaining control over herself was far from finished. Henceforth, while Mirja was busy yapping off at the mouth, The Suika Devil was far from surprised when the beast decided to knock the life straight out of the woman. What did The Wolf Shinigami honestly expect when that foul creation still lingered?

It is for this reason why Ibiki let out a soft exhaling of breath before producing a thick layer of burning orange power from out of her body. In the abyss of this pitch black darkness, the radiating light of The Devil Shinigami's power flared like the burning sight of a blazing sun. So, much like the illumination of Ibiki's will brought the essence of sight into the shadows, as to would Mirja have to do the same thing within herself.

"What do you want me to do? I can slaughter this creature, but it will only come back because you have not finished the instability that lingers within yourself."

A shift in The Commander's gaze brought her amber-lit eyes toward the sight of the monster roaring down on Mirja. If it dared to cross that line of making an attempt at Ibiki's physical safety, then in that same moment the creatures life was forfeit and the faint growling of demonic creatures roaring in the distance echoed in that moment to signify her instinct to fight. However, Ibiki had no intention of jumping in otherwise.

Instead, the horned woman uttered these words out to Mirja to begin the next phase of their training:

"You have my Resolve Force within you: search deeper for the root of your instability, drag it out and let it become a part of you. Once you see it for what it is, you can accept it, move on and allow it to make you stronger."

Ow, ouch, oohh, dammit. Getting blasted by herself who was riding the last-resort ace-in-the-hole techniques that Mirja had cultivated over her life was not a fun experience. But with the voice of Ibiki, and her shining bright light filling Mirja's heart there was no way she could even comprehend the idea to back down. So she turned herself inwards, shattered arms laying by her sides. She was used to breakages after all. And there was a blossoming feeling in her heart, something like the normal fury of battle, but both enhanced, and bridled. It was a glorious feeling.

'Got anything for my legs?' Mirja asked, staring intently at the monster as it seemed lost in it's own head to comprehend the concept of pressing the attack. Until the burning bright arms vanished and in their place, pure white boots encompassed Mirja's legs. Knee-high and shining, there were stylish fins sticking out, and they felt very comfortable. Which was surprising, she never went in for footwear. But, then it was a piece of her soul so if the footwear was uncomfortable, there was some major questions that needed to be asked about herself.

And also there was the words from Ibiki. The monster took the change in power as an attack and rushed her, but Mirja was ready for it now, and the boots allowed her to push past herself and smash a foot into it's head. Given a few moments as it followed Mirja's earlier lead and smashed into the ground, she panted and looked inwards. The words from Ibiki. She could think on them now. She had the Resolve Force, she was trusted by the one so close to her, enogh to have a part of her Resolve Force. That made her heart swell with pride. And no shortage of love for the Devil Girl. How could she care enough about Mirja to be so determined to rescue her from herself? It just flew in the face of everything she had ever known.

"Uhh, you know, I don't even know if killing this thing will keep it down. It's an anomoly. It's not meant to exist. We are in Terra Incognito right now, and while that's where the best development comes from.." she paused for a second to execute an ultra-high version of her Footwork technique, and then sent the Tulpa off down the road again "..generally not the best idea to experiment with something that really, really wants to kill you and definately has the firepower to see it's goals through. Although, there isn't much reason to listen to me right now. Formulating plans even as I talk to you, I just like talking. It's a thing for me. A thingy thing" She told Ibiki, yammering on constantly to keep herself calm.

Draw out the root of her problems, huh? That is what Ibiki said. Would it change the Tulpa? Would it do anything? Would it just be her dredging up old memories and being hurt all over again by them? But, It was Ibiki. She knew what to do. She had clearly so much more experience than Mirja. She wasn't a girl to run from that which scared her. So Mirja went into herelf, and found the heaviest, darkest sack of pustle she could, before dragging it back up, into the open, the forefront of her mind. They exploded there, and it was crippling. She could barely handle the stabbing reminder of her two words moments in her life.

And just as her terrible moments were split into two, incredibly powerful moments, so did the Tulpa scream and twist and then rip down the middle into two incredibly powerful monsters. Each one with such focused intensity that it sort to tear her apart from just their desire.
"Well, there are now two of them. Somehow I am doubting the integrity of your methods, Ibiki" Mirja said, but it was said with a light-hearted tease to it, so hopefully she wouldn't get too upset over the words. But then, she saw the man on the left. The kid on the right wrenched her heart with despair, her first kill. A life she stole before he was even a man. He was her biggest regret in this life. But the man on the left....that was something altogether different.

'Mirja, I feel I should have mentioned this earlier, but...' Beowulf tried to speak, but was cut off with a shriek. A shriek of anger, of hatred, of pure, undiluted wroth to shake the very foundations of the world they stood on.
'You know, if you've got a scaling fury-power, maybe mention that sooner?' Hvit chimed in. There was no more Mirja. There was just an avatar of pure bloodlust, and tangible disgust. Probably not something Ibiki was all to happy being linked to, and thus feeling the sheer depth of it much more keenly than just sensing the thick waves of killing intent rolling off off Mirja. Because, in front of her, next to the man of deepest despair, stood Doctor Caanan.

Mirja, was on fire. Her body burned as if she had spontaneously transferred all of her blood out of her body, and replaced it with lava. She was moving, rushing towards something she didn't know. And all around her was heat, and fury. She had never been so angry in her life. She felt the hold she had over her mentality slipped out of her hands and was now running down the road so merrily. Her beast, her beloved beast, who shouldered all that was rage and hatred, was now in control. And with it came a battle lust unbridled, and unparalleled.

Of course, the Tulpa wasn't going to stand there and take it - well, one of them was, it seemed, the boy she had ended the life of just stood there with a stare - and it sprung into combat, matching Mirja's first punch but being hopelessly outmatched for the return blow. The power that was circling in her muscles right now could probably threaten an entire continent, if applied precisely. But, that was the kicker. The Beast didn't know what precise meant, it just knew rip and slash and tear and maim. And that it did, each blow sending concussive shockwaves throughout the underground prison.

And all the time, Mirja was helpless, she could just watch from the sidelines as a massive fire burned in her mind and body, one that could not be extinguished, and denied all passage. Burning herself metaphorically was a strange feeling, but it wasn't one she wanted to repeat, so instead of rushing in, she stood and watched, aware that every second passing was a second that The Beast used Mirja's body in ways that despite her Tulpa-based manipulation, it wasn't graded to handle. She could feel bones groaning and muscles straining from overuse, and needed to figure this out soon.

It was perfect, this trial. The embodiment of what she had been trying to do for so long. Control her fear, control her fury, and become something that Ibiki could rely on. And as if thinking her name spurred action, she was hugged from behind, a warm amber light spilling out to cover her, and the most comforting feeling she had ever known, permeating her body.
"Considering how and when you were created, you are very warm and cheerful. Truly, what I wish to become" Mirja said, cuddling into Iko. And then she snapped into an alert nature, and she knew what she was doing. Ibiki was right, nobody could do everything alone. She would need help for this. Looking back, she saw the warm smile of Iko, that haughty smile of Hvit - she seemed to have realized what Mirja had a little sooner - and the surprisingly friendly stare of her one-eyed giant, Beowulf. She was not alone. While she did not really know how to rely on the people outside, she knew that her people inside would never stir her wrong.

As one, each hand reached into the fire, and encompassed the burning Mirja in a secure hug. One that gave the creature a sense of immense love, and support. It did not know what to do, and froze on the spot. Never before had it been treated like this, it had always been treated with a wary eye and a thought of need, nothing more. Always believed itself to be disposed of as soon as it was no longer needed. But now, it was being loved, it was being shown despite the pain that caused, that it did not need to be in this dark abyss alone. And it was nice.

While the beast was distracted, Beowulf took command of the Bankai and dispelled it. Without the enhancing power of the Bankai, Mirja's fury abated, and The Beast lost it's grip. Drawn back into the Inner World, for an entirely new sort of adventure. And so Mirja properly returned to her body, and felt that it was so close to collapsing. Her mind was exhausted, her body was beyond exhausted, and she had nothing left in either of them to shore up her lack. And yet, even though there was nothing left for her too use left in her body, Mirja remained standing and looked at the man, simply refusing the idea that she was going to fall before she had finished what she needed to do, and thus the world could not argue with such a force of will. The boy. He was hardly more than seventeen in his appearance. She gave a soft, sad smile and nodded to him.

"You...have haunted me for a long time. I have never been proud of myself and my power because of what it did to you. I have feared my power because of what it did to you. But I can not fear myself any longer, and so I must let you go. I must be able to be myself,and I can not accomplish that while clinging to fear. I have people I need to protect, people I need to help. People, I need to be of use to. And I can't do any of that if I am scared of what I can do" She then laughed, an action that strained her body, and she wobbled a bit, before re-grasping herself with her Mind. "She was right. 'Since your power is your tool, if you trust in it, it will never betray you. If you fear it however. . . It was eventually betray you'. Never thought she'd be giving anything remotely insightful considering how we met" Mirja flicked her eyes, met the gaze of the Tulpa-man. They stared, and then it nodded, and faded away, becoming less substantial than the wind itself.

Mirja then turned, to look at Ibiki, but that was the limit of her willpower's ability to hold her up. It had done magnificently, but everything ended. And so it was more of an awkward collapse. Mirja was out cold before she hit the floor, hoping that Ibiki wouldn't just leave her here, but that was just her pessimist. Ibiki, cared about Mirja, and after this, there wasn't a doubt about that.