Shimada Kambei
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Shimada Kambei
Sat Feb 02, 2013 4:35 pm
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» Name: Shimada Kambei
» Titles: Mecha, or General Mecha
» Appearance Age: 29
» True Age: 600
» Gender: Male
Affiliation/Rank: Monsuta
» Appearance Description:
Shimada is a man of very average height being at about 5'10. Shimada has a very average like body not being to muscular but not also being fat. As Shimada does have very visible muscles. Now the most spotted thing about Shimada is his long brown hair. His hair reaches all the way to the top of his shoulders making it very easy to spot. On top of that Shimada is always seen in white samurai like clothing.
» Appearance Picture:
- Spoiler:
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» Personality:
Prideful: Shimada is a man that takes pride in everything that he does. As Shimada pride is something that tends to get him in trouble even though he could care less what other people think Shimada has a big since of his pride and will never accept defeat no matter the cost. As Shimada is one who can just not accept that someone can beat him in anything. Though the biggest thing that Shimada has problems accepting is people being better than him when it comes down to be a scientist and creating inventions. As Shimada biggest thing is his life is his ability to create new invention and keep bringing technology to a new level for himself and those that he works for. And so if one were to insult the work of Shimada his pride would most likely not let him take it sitting down. As Shimada would probably instantly challenge any person to a fight for insulting his work without a seconds hesitation.
Calm Minded: Shimada is one who tends to be very calm minded not giving a fuck what other people have to say about him. As Shimada feels that people will always find some reason to insult you. But Shimada feels that they can try and insult and bring him down all they want he will never budge under what they have to say about him. This makes Shimada a person who can keep his cool and focus even in this most heated situations. This is due to the fact that one could throw some of the most heated insults at Shimada and he would just throw them off as though no one ever said anything to him. Though there are small things that can make Shimada lose his calm mind. Though this is something that is barley seen done, as many people do not know the little things that are needed to be said to make Shimada tick.
Focused: Shimada is one who is completely focused on any task that he has on hand. This is due to the fact that when Shimada is given a task he puts all of his attention into that one task and will do whatever it takes for him to finish doing that task even if it kills him. This is something that allows for Shimada to finish many things in a short amount of time as he puts all of his focus on one task letting him quickly finish task with the best of his abilities. Due to this Shimada tends to be a very big go to guy when things are needed to be finished in a quickly but high quality fashion. Since with Shimada focus he can easily do something at very quality in half if not less the time that it would take someone else to do the same thing. This comes from Shimada working with all his heart and soul on all of the projects that he does so that he may better help himself and those with him.
Loyal: Shimada is one who is loyal to the people that show they are worth having his loyalty. As Shimada feels without loyalty, one cannot truly advance in this world. As loyalty is what helps people know who is on their side and if a person does not show loyalty then they have no honor. Shimada is one he will give his trust and loyalty to only those that he feels will do the same to him. Though Shimada has yet to find many people that he feels will due this, and so he only in trust his loyalty to very few people. Though threw his search Shimada has managed to find something that he is able to put his loyalty into. And that would be his organization The Monsuta. As Shimada feels that as long as he has his faith in his organization they will have their faith in him allowing from him to grow and prosper as a scientist.
Perverted: Shimada is one who can easily find the most perverted things out of everything. This is because Shimada is a pervert at heart. As he loves to make perverted jokes at people just to see how acquired things get with them. Though Shimada also just loves to make jokes, as he is a fun loving guy who loves to make those around him feel comfortable around him. As Shimada is sure that most people see him as a super smart serious guy that never has fun. Though Shimada is just like any other male who loves women, as Shimada feels that a womens body is a gift from above. As Shimada feels that even with his brains he can never make something so beautiful. As Shimada favorite part of a woman is their booty, and he feels that nothing could ever come close to replicating the feeling and the greatness of a womens big natural booty.
Strategist: Shimada is one who uses his mind to help him overcome his opponents. This is because Shimada is a very big when it comes down to commanding his troops and keeping everything they way it should be. This is also part of the reason that Shimada is known as the General as he is easily able to command troops into doing different strategies so that he may better defeat those that come at him. And with his strategies he is easily able to overcome some of his greater foes that would most likely beat him if it had not been for his strategies. And so Shimada has become well known among those that know him a General Mecha or Mecha general, as these nick names come from Shimada’s commanding style on the battle field.
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» Zanpakutō Name: Kuro to shiro no ana
» Zanpakutō Spirit Appearance:
- Spoiler:
» Zanpakutō Spirit Personality:
Kuro is a spirit of generosity always willing to help Shimada advance himself at whatever the cost. Though Kuro does have times were he does not like to be disturbed like when he is working on things. Though for the most people Kuro likes people and the world always willing to give a helping hand to those who is friends with. And Kuro is a spirit who is very big on helping other people out no matter the cost. As he feels that if a person helps out another person the world can become a better place. And one of the few things that can make Kuro mad is when a person refuses to help out another person.
» Inner World:
- Spoiler:
Sealed Zanpakutō Appearance:While sealed Kikai is a stylish silver and black katana
- Spoiler:
Constant release: Shimada’s energy with is Zanpakutō is so great that Shimada Is not able to control all of it. And become of Shimada's lack of control his Zanpakutō is Constantly in Shikai form. This is due to Shimada containing great amounts of energy and not being able to control it with great control. Though there are times when Shimada’s Zanpakutō will convert itself back to its sealed form. This will happen at times when Shimada is out of energy or even times when he has run out of energy. Though the most common time for Shimada’s Zanpakutō to return to its sealed form is when Shimada has been knocked out. As this is when Shimada loses connection with his Zanpakutō and will not be able to keep connected to Shimada’s energy. .
» Release Phrase:
Energy, Absorb and release the world with your destruction and creation.
» Shikai Appearance:
- Spoiler:
» Shikai Abilities:
- White Hole Manipulation:
White Hole Manipulation: Shimada has the ability to control and create White holes. Though this may seem strange and weird Shimada is able to release matter and energy in a setting in order to create an exposer so that White holes may come forth. Through this Shimada is able to control white holes. White holes unlike black holes release everything causing victims to be pushed with a strong force. Now hypothetically a white hole can’t be entered from the outside though things like light and matter are able to escape from a White hole. White holes unlike black holes represent the future meaning that anything that starts to fall into a white hole will truly never reach it as it is the past and a white hole can't be entered meaning that this object will theoretically be stuck in space and time as it tries to fall and never reaches its destination it will be stuck in a limbo. Now unlike a black hole White Holes release energy when they come into effect. Though Shimada is able to create and manipulate white holes he can only create and manipulate white holes up 35 meters around him.
• Energy explosion: Through releasing energy Shimada is able to cause small to medium explosions around him. This is doing by releasing energy through a white hole. By releasing this energy Shimada will be able to cause explosions to medium size explosions. The more energy that Shimada lets be released the more powerful the explosion will be. Though the size of the explosion depends on how far Shimada lets the energy spread. Once Shimada starts to release the energy a white hole will be made the bigger the white hole the larger the area of the explosion. Now Even though Shimada can make a white hole that is 35 meters in diameter it is going to take him more energy to make the explosion actually be able to do a lot of damage.
• Energy Field: Through his White Hole Manipulation Shimada is able to release energy. This can be used to give energy back to people. As it is a way of replenishing a person’s energy. As through a white hole Shimada is able release almost limitless amounts of energy. This is due to White holes releasing endless amounts of energy. Though this does have a draw back. As anyone in the area of the white hole is able to draw on this energy. So this could not only power up Shimada and his allies but also his enemy’s. Shimada is able to control the size of the white hole that will release this energy. And so if Shimada were to make a small white hole that only one person could fit in. This would allow for only that person to gain this energy.
• Energy Overload: Shimada is able to overload people and objects by causing a white hole to give them more energy. As if one were to gain too much energy from a white hole it would overload their body. This could cause something’s to explode with excessive energy. Now if a person is to take in too much energy from a white hole it will cause their body to Implode. Though the amount of energy to overload a person depends on the amount of energy the can keep in their body as well as how high their tier is. Though people like Quincy and Chi users will have a hard time taking in a lot of energy as their bodies do not use energy from inside of themselves. They use the energy outside around them. And so when Shimada uses energy overload the energy is pushed inside of their body.
• Energy Strike: This is a move done by Shimada channeling white hole energy into his blade and making slashes at his opponents. Once Shimada’s blade makes contact with an object it will cause an explosion the size of the blade. The more force Shimada swings with blade the stronger the explosion will be. This will also push the opponent back from Shimada not just do to the power of the explosion but the fact that white holes push away objects from them as they release energy. So once a person is hit by the blade they will not only be pushed by the force of the explosion but the power of the white hole pushing them back. This makes two forces acting at once allowing for people to be moved back from Shimada real easy.
- Black Hole Manipulation:
Black Hole Manipulation: Shimada is one who is able to control and manipulate black holes. Shimada does this by absorbing in Matter and energy. This will then bring forth a Black Hole that is under the control of Shimada. Now unlike a White hole which releases Energy and matter. A Black Hole Sucks in everything and unlike a White Hole a black hole will bring things towards it sucking them in instead of pushing them away like a White Hole. Now unlike a white hole nothing is able to escape a black hole not even light or matter itself. So this means that once an object is inside of a Black Hole it is trapped inside of the hole and unable to escape. Now unlike a White Hole a Black Hole represents the future and does not release energy but absorbs the energy around . Now like with White Holes whole in Shikai, Shimada is able to create and manipulate black holes up to a 35 meter diameter from him.
• Energy Vacuum: Through creating a black hole Shimada will absorb energy from the area around him. Or from attacks that are coming at him. This will allow for Shimada to gain energy for his own attacks as well as being able to reuse the energy that he has gained. As Shimada will be able to make black holes of all different sizes that will absorb attacks that come near them. This will allow for Shimada to block attacks without actually blocking them. Though These holes can only absorb attacks that are of a lesser tier’s. Attacks of higher tier characters will over power the Black hole and keep on their path. Though the Black hole will be able to suck out some of their power and slow them down making them a little weaker. Like if a 0-5s cero went through the vortex it would come out as equal to a 1-1+’s cero. The rest of the energy would go into storage for Shimada.
» Bankai Appearance:
Same as Shikai
» Bankai Abilities:
Power Increase: Shimada in Bankai does gain a few new abilities though the main thing that happens in Bankai is that Shimada’s Shikai abilities are increased from their original state making Shimada stronger. This allows for Shimada to utilize his Shikai abilities in a higher level than could while in Shikai. One of the most notable things that changes in Bankai is Shimada’s range. As it changes from 35 meters to 100 meters, allowing Shimada to manipulate and control Black and White holes within an area of 100 meters in diameter. The range of Manipulation is the main increase that Shimada undergoes when he goes into Bankai.
- Gravity Manipulation:
Gravity Manipulation: Shimada through the use of Black and White holes has become able to manipulate Gravitons. This allows for Shimada to control the gravity within an area of 100 meters. As Shimada is able to manipulate the gravity to be less by using the ability of White holes releasing energy and pushing away objects making gravity decrease. This will allow for Shimada to make objects able to levitate. While if Shimada uses the ability of Black holes that absorbs energy and pulls objects towards them. Shimada will be able to increase the gravity of the area making it harder for people to move as well as making people heavier. Though the main way this ability comes into effect is by Shimada using his ability's of black and white holes and manipulating gravitons.
• Weight Manipulation: Through the control of gravitons Shimada is able to control his weight as well as the weight of others. By making Himself weightless or lose weight Shimada will be able to move with more grace as well as being able to move faster than what he could before. But Shimada can also use gravitons to increase his weight so that he can become an object that is almost immovable. Though Shimada can also use this as a Combat ability by increasing the weight of his opponent so that it is almost impossible for them to move, or making them as light as a feather so that even the lightest gust of wind can blow them over as well as making it hard for them to move. As they will be dam near weightless and start to float in the air making it hard to run for some people.
• Graviton Constructs: With manipulating gravitons Shimada is able to make constructs out of gravitons. Shimada will be able to make these constructs look like all different things. As Shimada can make a construct look like a sword or other things. Though unlike a regular weapon once a person is hit by a graviton Construct one or two things will happen gravity will ether start to increase on them or decrease on them depending on Shimada. Meaning that each strike from a weapon will ether decrease or increase the gravity by 10% on that person. Now by doing this Shimada will be able to crush a person to death if he is able to completely increase the gravity on them. As well as by decreasing the gravity on them he is able to make them float high up in the air making it hard for one to move.
• Gravity Bombs: Shimada is able to create explosives that are infused with gravitons. The effects can be controlled by Shimada himself. As it can be from increased gravity, reduced gravity, or even a complete reversal of gravity for everything in the explosion radius. Each bomb has an explosive radius of about 5 meters. These bombs can usually be thrown or projected at his targets. And once they explode everything hit by the blast will be under the effect of the gravitons.
• Gravity Beam: Shimada is able to project beams of gravity capable of literally pushing things out of his way by repelling objects, opponents and attacks and attract enemies to the beam by bringing them closer for gravity-infused impact. Shimada can also create gravity beams that are capable of pulverizing large areas with destructive concussive force.
• Gravity Aura: Shimada will be able to surround himself in a gravity aura repelling or attracting anything that the aura touches. By repelling attacks and objects Shimada is able to use this as a good defense against physical fighters who have to get close to him. As the Aura will push or pull anything within 5 meters of Shimada. Though this does have one weakness One can attack Shimada from the air or the ground as the Aura does not protect these areas. [/list]
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» Inner Hollow Description: (What does your Inner Hollow look like? Please use a picture or 1 paragraph)
» Inner Hollow Personality:
Shen is one who wants to see the world destroyed and nothing will let him rest until he knows that the world is destroyed and covered in darkness. As Shen is one does not believe that the current world we all live in is good. And he feels that it should face the judgment of darkness and undergo a complete reconstruction through darkness and come out as a new light. As Shen does not see darkness as a evil presence but something that can bring out a new light that will be able to shine brighter then the light before.
Shen i one who is down for anything as long as he feels he will gain something from it. This is the main reason that Shen has leaned Shimada his power as Shen feels that with Shimada he may one day be able to accomplish his goal and bring forth a complete new world that has never been seen before. And this world will shine so bright that darkness will also be able to become at its full strength. Shen is one who also believes that Judgment will come for everyone no matter what they do and so they should live life without wondering when judgment will come for them.
» Inner Hollow Powers:
Darkness Manipulation: Shen can create, control, manipulate, materialize and summon darkness. By itself, darkness is mostly used to cloud everything into total darkness, but by accessing a dimension of dark energy it can be channeled to a variety of effects, both as an absence of light and a solid substance: one can also control and manipulate the beings that exist there, create and dispel shields and areas of total darkness, create a variety of constructs and weapons and, teleport one's self through massive distances via shadows.
» Hollow Mask Appearance:
- Spoiler:
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» Vizard Powers:
Power Augmentation
Enhanced Spiritual Power
Enhanced Strength
Enhanced Speed
Enhanced Endurance
Enhanced Durability
Mask Regeneration
Bala (虚弾 (バラ), Bara; Spanish for "Bullet," Japanese for "Hollow Bullet") a technique of firing his hardened spiritual pressure against his enemies. Less powerful than a Cero, but it can be successively fired at 20 times the rate.
Cero (虚閃 (セロ), Sero; Spanish for "Zero," Japanese for "Hollow Flash," "Doom Blast" in the Viz translation) a powerful spiritual light fired by Menos Grandes and Arrancar.
Descorrer (解空(デスコレール), Desukorēru; Japanese for "Loosed Void", Spanish for "Drawing Back/Opening"): A technique used by Espada-level Arrancar and sometimes others, to open a Garganta between the living world and Hueco Mundo.
Garganta (黒腔 (ガルガンタ), Garuganta; Spanish for "Throat", Japanese for "Black Cavity") is how Arrancar and Hollows are able to move in and out from Hueco Mundo. It is a spiritual pathway connecting the Arrancar's world, Hueco Mundo, to other worlds. Besides the World of the Living and the Soul Society, it can also open the gates of the Dangai and K-World. A turbulence of Reishi blows within Garganta. To move through it, travellers must create footholds using the Reishi.
Gran Rey Cero (王虚の閃光 (グラン・レイ・セロ), Guran Rei Sero; Spanish for "Grand King Zero", Japanese for "Royal Hollow Flash") The ultimate Cero that can only be used by Espadas. It is so powerful, it distorts the surrounding space.
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» Resurrección Appearance: (What does your character look like when they transform into their Resurrección state?
» Resurrección Abilities: (When a character ascends to this state, they at their peak power. As such, you will need to post at least 5 paragraph's describing their powers.)
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» Background:
Shimada was born to the soul society as the child of two soul reapers. Through time this made Shimada have a hard upbringing, as his parents were not always able to spend a lot of time with him due to the fact that they had to do their job as members of the Gotei. To compensate for this Shimada spent most of his childhood in the Shino academy training and watching the other students train since he was not truly old enough to become a student himself. Allowing for Shimada to start learning about his Shinigami talents at a very young age. Being something that would come to help Shimada in the future very much. As Shimada’s time as a kid would be something that helped him in his future very much, when it came time for him to enter the Shino Academy himself.
Once Shimada became of age he would instantly be signed up for the Academy. As he had no choice in the matter even though he agreed on becoming a Shinigami like his parents, though he didn’t see why they would think they would have to force him to become one. Instantly Shimada would set himself apart from his classmates as he had already been training in his Shinigami skills since he was a young child plus the fact that both of his parents were seated members of the Gotei. And so as expected Shimada would instantly become a top member of his class. Although his time at the Shino Academy, though he would reject the option to graduate early. As Shimada felt that he would be better if he continued his training instead of leaving early.
As staying in the Shino Academy would allow for Shimada to not only get a better grasp of his abilities but he would also be able to bond more with his future comrades. And though his parents did not agree with his decision they let him make it on his own. And so Shimada would continue his training at the Academy and graduate with the rest of his classmates. Once graduated Shimada would instantly go on to join his parents in the 13 court guard squads. This would be a short lived, as Shimada did not feel as though he was a person who fit in the Gotei as it just was not his place. And so one night Shimada would leave without letting anyone know.
He would make his way to the world of the living were he would lay low and keep himself hidden for anyone that might be looking for him. This would work for a few years as Shimada was able to keep himself from discovery. But sadly on one day Shimada would use his powers to fight a hollow in the sight of a Shinigami. They would soon recognize who Shimada was and send his parents after him. And soon enough Shimada would be found by his parents as he started to undergo strange changes. These changes would come from Shimada getting infected by the hollow that he had battled. And though his parents did not agree with what was going on, they would help hide Shimada from the Gotei so that he would not be charged with absence without leave as well with the transforming into a hollow.
And so soon Shimada would have a life style of being on the run. With the help of his parents telling him when the Gotei were close to finding him Shimada would easily be able to stay one step ahead. Though soon Shimada would have trouble keeping up with this life style and would soon battle and kill all of the Shinigami that were on his trail. Though Shimada was sure that this would make things worse for him he was sure that it would by him more time. Though this did by him some time it would also make Shimada a threat to the Gotei increasing his charges against them making him even more wanted. Soon the life of running would soon become harder for Shimada as soon his group of one would have an extra member in his group of one.
This would be a girl by the name of Sherri, Shimada would soon start to take care of her and treat her like a daughter. Even though he had doubts at first. Because Shimada felt that the girl would only slow him down in his hiding from the Gotei as we as being a possible reason as to why he would get caught by the Gotei one day. But Shimada did not feel it in him to abandon a poor helpless girl that could not defend herself from simple hollows. Eventually Shimada would soon learn to love and treat the girl like a true daughter to him. As he felt that she completed him in his quest to find inner peace. And plus the fact that Sherri like himself was also a Vizard. This was something that made Shimada feel at home with her. And so with Sherri Shimada would soon join the Vizard group the Monsuta.
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» PhatomTech: (Does your character have a PhatomTech brain installed? If so, you'll be able to qualify for upgrade at the Cybermind or add other Cybernetic parts to your character to make them stronger. Click here for more information about Phantom Tech)
» Phantom Tech Abilities: (What can your character do with his or her's add-ons? This applies to any upgrades your character has gotten from places like The Cybermind as well.)
» Phantom Tech Powers: (This refers to things outside of Add-ons unlike Abilities. What Phantom Tech Powers are, in a sense, is basically what kind of power did your character gain from having a Cyberbrain? For example, Shadin Yuudeshi gained Imaginary Computation with his Cybernetic upgrades and has the ability to bring tangible things into existence with his computers Quantum Calculations.)
_____________________________________________General Skills
- Durability: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- General Speed: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- Strength: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- Weapon Skill: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Racial Skills
- Hoho: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- Cero/Bala/Kidō: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- Zanjutsu: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
- Hakuda: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
_____________________________________________
» Role Play Sample: (This is to test where your level of role playing is at. Please paste or create an example how you role play if this is your first app on the site. If this is not your first APPROVED app, then please remove this section of the app.)
- ElendrilEstablished Member
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Re: Shimada Kambei
Sat Feb 09, 2013 11:29 am
Filler post
This app is also done
This app is also done
- GuestGuest
Re: Shimada Kambei
Thu Feb 14, 2013 12:10 am
Oi you got some fixing to do boy!
First: Constant Shikai. Why does your character have a constant shikai? There is no explanation other then he has a lot of energy. How does he have this much energy? Why? You don't even have that as a separate trait to include it, or a reasonable explanation. So change that, fix it, or remove it.
Second: White/Black Holes. That's a lovely concept.. except that every ability after it doesn't even RELATE to the general concept. The entire thing is messed up to be fair, and just seems like general energy manipulation based, rather then acutally White/Black hole usage. So that doesn't fit anything at all. I'd suggest reworking the entirety of the concepts at their core base; what do you want out of your shikai? Since this just seems.. patch worked.
Third: Gravity manipulation. This is a really hard and frowned upon move set within the site. I don't think you can handle it, for one, second? Your entirety of explaining how it came to be, and why you have it, makes no sense. Just.. utterly none. So I suggest that you discard this power and try for something simpler, that would fit with your previous re-works and power set.
Fourth: Please make this less of a rip off of League of Legends character Shen and Zed.
Fifth: your history is a bit hard to read, because the grammar and the entire thought flow is kinda wonky. You use ''even though'' almost constantly and even just feel off. I'd suggest re-reading and taking a few looks at it.
That concludes our checking!
Second: White/Black Holes. That's a lovely concept.. except that every ability after it doesn't even RELATE to the general concept. The entire thing is messed up to be fair, and just seems like general energy manipulation based, rather then acutally White/Black hole usage. So that doesn't fit anything at all. I'd suggest reworking the entirety of the concepts at their core base; what do you want out of your shikai? Since this just seems.. patch worked.
Third: Gravity manipulation. This is a really hard and frowned upon move set within the site. I don't think you can handle it, for one, second? Your entirety of explaining how it came to be, and why you have it, makes no sense. Just.. utterly none. So I suggest that you discard this power and try for something simpler, that would fit with your previous re-works and power set.
Fourth: Please make this less of a rip off of League of Legends character Shen and Zed.
Fifth: your history is a bit hard to read, because the grammar and the entire thought flow is kinda wonky. You use ''even though'' almost constantly and even just feel off. I'd suggest re-reading and taking a few looks at it.
That concludes our checking!
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Re: Shimada Kambei
Mon Mar 04, 2013 7:51 pm
Updated
- RaikiModerator
- 2nd place
November COTM 2011 : 1st place Zefonse
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Re: Shimada Kambei
Mon Mar 04, 2013 9:02 pm
DENID, first off your powers are to strong, REWORK them, creating black holes that powerful is a NO, even for a shikai,
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Re: Shimada Kambei
Wed Mar 06, 2013 5:22 pm
Can i get actual information instead of just a its denied and OP
- GuestGuest
Re: Shimada Kambei
Thu Mar 07, 2013 1:50 pm
Aivee wrote:Oi you got some fixing to do boy!First: Constant Shikai. Why does your character have a constant shikai? There is no explanation other then he has a lot of energy. How does he have this much energy? Why? You don't even have that as a separate trait to include it, or a reasonable explanation. So change that, fix it, or remove it.
Second: White/Black Holes. That's a lovely concept.. except that every ability after it doesn't even RELATE to the general concept. The entire thing is messed up to be fair, and just seems like general energy manipulation based, rather then acutally White/Black hole usage. So that doesn't fit anything at all. I'd suggest reworking the entirety of the concepts at their core base; what do you want out of your shikai? Since this just seems.. patch worked.
Third: Gravity manipulation. This is a really hard and frowned upon move set within the site. I don't think you can handle it, for one, second? Your entirety of explaining how it came to be, and why you have it, makes no sense. Just.. utterly none. So I suggest that you discard this power and try for something simpler, that would fit with your previous re-works and power set.
Fourth: Please make this less of a rip off of League of Legends character Shen and Zed.
Fifth: your history is a bit hard to read, because the grammar and the entire thought flow is kinda wonky. You use ''even though'' almost constantly and even just feel off. I'd suggest re-reading and taking a few looks at it.
That concludes our checking!
Doesn't that look familiar?
There is no a single change done that I asked for on this file; you kept the same premises, concepts and everything else. Therefore, Raiki is in the right and you will be denied unless you can find a way to save this file. I will deny this file in 10 days if you do not give notice of the status. Thank you.
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Re: Shimada Kambei
Thu Mar 07, 2013 5:41 pm
First if you read i changed the stuff you actually gave info on, As i changed it and explained why he is constant Shikai due to he has to much energy and cant control it (Before you say anything this is the same reason Ichigo and Kenny have constant release)
Second the concept is not complete holes like you said it is more to do with releasing and absorbing energy.
Third if i am not mistaken their are a few characters here with the power and a lot of characters with far more greater powers. And it is stated a use Gravitons to control gravity by manipulating white and dark holes. So by decreasing the amount of energy in gravitons it decreases gravity, and by increasing the amount of energy in gravitons i increase gravity. And si really dont care if you think i can or cant handle it.
Fourth: As i have never read those characters i do not know how that is a rip off
Fifth i fixed the history and the thing you said i use constantly was only used 3 times, so did you even read the history ?
So actually look at the app cause i did make changes, Good day
Second the concept is not complete holes like you said it is more to do with releasing and absorbing energy.
Third if i am not mistaken their are a few characters here with the power and a lot of characters with far more greater powers. And it is stated a use Gravitons to control gravity by manipulating white and dark holes. So by decreasing the amount of energy in gravitons it decreases gravity, and by increasing the amount of energy in gravitons i increase gravity. And si really dont care if you think i can or cant handle it.
Fourth: As i have never read those characters i do not know how that is a rip off
Fifth i fixed the history and the thing you said i use constantly was only used 3 times, so did you even read the history ?
So actually look at the app cause i did make changes, Good day
- GuestGuest
Re: Shimada Kambei
Sun Mar 10, 2013 12:09 pm
Oh boy, here we go.
First and foremost: Watch your attitude. Don't argue with me, this is a moderator's official warning.
Second: This is all to reply to your statements.
Now here's the added things.
One: Cross out any sections that aren't being used or plainly remove them. You aren't getting bankai, so cross that out, remove the roleplay sample section, cross out Phantom Tech/Ressurection as well.
Second: Your vizard powers aren't totally described. Please get down to that and explain how each works on the character in full detail.
Third: Any and all arguing will result in consequences; so I'd suggest be careful with your words and how you put them down.
And that's all for now.
Second: This is all to reply to your statements.
-- ... this makes no sense. You're saying because Shimada has high levels of energy and his Zanpaktou, which I might add that on Shimada's case it's indicated NOWHERE ELSE ON THE DAMN FILE, and he can't control it, it decides to remain in constant shikai? No. Not good enough, considering you have nothing that leads into it. You just want constant shikai release because of. So that's denied.First if you read i changed the stuff you actually gave info on, As i changed it and explained why he is constant Shikai due to he has to much energy and cant control it (Before you say anything this is the same reason Ichigo and Kenny have constant release)
-- Then change the damn names from White Hole and Black Hole and get rid of any terminology associated to that because it's misleading and implies you can do things beyond what you claim your concept to be. In fact, re-work all of the abilities until its something reasonable, considering you have no drawbacks from taking in massive amounts of energy for no reason, or even any sort of ill-effects from over energy. This is a bit ridiculous because everything comes with a cost.. and you don't really have one.Second the concept is not complete holes like you said it is more to do with releasing and absorbing energy.
-- Well it's denied anyways, so don't even bother and remove it. Gravity manipulation is one of those site powers that are heavily watched, so it doesn't matter if you care or not, you are not allowed this power. And that's the bottom line.Third if i am not mistaken their are a few characters here with the power and a lot of characters with far more greater powers. And it is stated a use Gravitons to control gravity by manipulating white and dark holes. So by decreasing the amount of energy in gravitons it decreases gravity, and by increasing the amount of energy in gravitons i increase gravity. And si really dont care if you think i can or cant handle it.
-- Doesn't matter, still a rip off from the game itself, which I may add isn't profiles or manga or anything, it's from the video game LoL aka League of Legends. So please remove anything pertaining to them. That means the darkness manipulation, the whole spurned by the clan thing. Btw, you forgot the appearance, which is necessary for a inner hollow.Fourth: As i have never read those characters i do not know how that is a rip off
Now here's the added things.
One: Cross out any sections that aren't being used or plainly remove them. You aren't getting bankai, so cross that out, remove the roleplay sample section, cross out Phantom Tech/Ressurection as well.
Second: Your vizard powers aren't totally described. Please get down to that and explain how each works on the character in full detail.
Third: Any and all arguing will result in consequences; so I'd suggest be careful with your words and how you put them down.
And that's all for now.
- GuestGuest
Re: Shimada Kambei
Fri Mar 29, 2013 8:38 am
Moving this to wip!
Been over 10 days since there's been progress/work on this thing!
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