Summary of Naruto

DISCLAIMER: DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT WANT THE PLOT OF NARUTO SPOILED, ARE NOT SMART ENOUGH TO THINK THAT THE THOUGHTS OF THIS ARE ONLY HELD BY ONE PERSON, OR HAVE EMOPHOBIA.
*ALSO, USER EDGE IS NOT PERMITTED TO REPLY TO THIS THREAD.

Today I will be exploring the magnificent plot of what I know of Mamashi Kishimoto's popular series Naruto.

Well, in the beginning, some stuff about him eating a giant demon while a baby occurred, and we saw this dude standing on a frog.
After that, some stuff happened, but none of that is very important.
Then Naruto finally becomes a ninja!! Which wasn't expected at all.
Oh yeah, we get a flashback of him using main character jutsu on a level-1 baddie who could probably have been beaten with a good smack over the head.
Moving on, we meet the other two main characters.
One is a massive fangirl for the other guy, note, useless as f@#$.
Naruto also quite likes the useless although she likes the other guy.
The other guy you get right from the start is a massive emo who just wants to seek out his own emoness... and may like Naru-
NARUSAS FOREVER!
SAKUSAS IS THE BEST!
HEY! GET OUT OF MY SUMMARY! NOW! WHO LET YOU FANGIRLS IN HERE ANYWAY?
AHEM, anyway, they go out for a mission that all their traits become clear in.
Sasuke is a huge emo, Sakura is utterly useless, and Naruto tries but utterly fails.
However, in the end they win by breaking the rules. Thank god Kakashi doesn't get enough brain to his skull thanks to that mask.
Then they go on some missions... and stuff... and Naruto turns out to be an emo as well for a moment stabbing his hand, but he soon gets over it after a demon wrecks a whole lot of people's s@#$.
Anyway, they eventually get to the point where they can show some of the other annoying characters from the beginning!
There's a Bruce Lee wanna-be, another emo who becomes Sasuke's best buddy forever later on NO BAD SASGAR, BAD, BAD, LEAVE!
Then they meet YET ANOTHER EMO, this one with bugs, a girl without a single willful bone in her body who has the world's most pathetic crush on Naruto, who being the failure he is, completely is oblivious to it. Oh, and there's a dog-guy whose mother was literally a b@#$!.
Finally they all realize that they are going to be taking a test... at which point Naruto freaks out because he has the intelligence of a frog.
Then, before they take the test, they meet this cool bro-ham from an upper year who wants to help the kids out. However, he turns out just to be another nerd with glasses and a whole lot of trading cards; he even has holographics!
However, he becomes a winner by not cheating when everyone else in the entire room is doing so. And they all win too, by cheating.
Then much to everyone's dismay, they have to go OUTSIDE. And after meeting a tongue lady who looks more like a rapist than anything else, she promptly throws a bunch of underage ninja into a forest to survive by themselves.
However, while in this forest, the unimaginable happens, repeatedly. First, Naruto's stupidity is used as a weapon, Naruto is involved in snake vore, Sakura tries to NOT be useless but only succeeds in cutting her own hair, and Sasuke becomes EVEN MORE EMO.
From being bit on the neck by a pedophile. Who also happens to be in charge of the snake that nommed Naruto.
Sasuke wakes up from his not-so-life changing bite to proceed to rape the people that assaulted him and naruto in their sleep; however, everyone else that came to help them blatantly failed.
Then after that, they sit down for a nice home cooked meal. And meet the cool guy again after Naruto cheats. Later on, they realized that if Naruto tries to cheat, he breaks the plotline.
Anyway, now with senior-is-helping-us Jutsu, they manage to do battle with a whole bunch of mooks. They win thanks to eyehax and proceed onwards.
They finally make it to epic sauce place! Some other stuff happened in that forest, but other than the sand emo making people's blood rain on him while he held an umbrella, nothing else significant occurred.
And when they get there, they find out that most of the surviving kids are all seventh graders, and that they have to have one on one fights to the death! And this is only the first round!
So, the senior drops out, much to everyone's sadness. Then we find out he's really with the creepy tongue guy. Because no one smart can be on the good guy's team unless they're a pervert.
Sasuke fights and much to everyone's shock, doesn't become more emo! Of course, he wins due to eyehax but manages to wreck his body beyond absolute repair. Such is the power of emo!
Then they had some more fights until finally Sakura got to fight. And she didn't lose!
However, her opponent was equally useless, so they both just kind of failed.
Then came an actual GOOD fight. It was Bowl Cut versus Emo of the Sand.
However, despite how simply epic the level of Bowl Cut's constipation was, in the end Sand Emo cheated with shields and so he lost.





**WIP**