Reconcile and All That [Natasha/Natsumi]

The nurses did not like her and Natsumi was a-okay with that! Every time they came in to bring her lunch, they had to hide the rest of the lunch cart because she always stole someone else’s jello. When Natsumi figured that out, she just took it from around the corner and hid it behind the door until they left. The nurses realized what was going on, so they started delivering to everyone else first. Natsumi caught onto that as well, and was now watching the lunch lady disappear into another room. Natsumi lifted three different jello cups and brought them into her room, hiding them in a drawer before she returned her attention to the television.

Natsumi was dropped off at the hospital by someone else. The man was described as large, black hair, and pretty intimidating. Natsumi was confused on why the man who attacked her saved her; that was her assumption anyway. She couldn't remember much beyond the pain. She was still dealing with her wounds, wrapped up in bandages like a mummy. It would be cool if it didn't hurt so much.

"Natsumi!" The nurse came to her room and crossed her arms. "I didn't do it!" Natsumi put up both hands and dropped the TV remote, feigning innocence. "Where is the rest of the jello? Why do you insist on stealing from everyone else!" "I didn't do it, I didn't do it!" Natsumi yelled. "Wasn't me this time, nuh'uh."

For what felt like an eternity, Natasha felt relieved to know she could could finally return to her household after spending an extended period in the hospital. Of course, that was not to say she held any ill-will toward the doctors and nurses who spent their hours toiling away to ensure her she was in peak condition, for their efforts alone encompassed the entire scope of her appreciation. An active woman at heart, she simply didn't enjoy an environment that generally demanded bedrest and the watchful eyes of doctors overlooking one's body.

It was precisely because of that minor discomfort that she requested a few of her favorite tablets be brought to her bedside. Now that she was gearing up to head home, Natasha decided she ought to ensure she was bringing back her favorite items to avoid coming back here any quicker than she needed to. When she entered, her pace was quick and efficient.

Every item in her possession was packed within the span of a few moments, contained within a blue dufflebag slung over her back. Furtively dancing through the door with a whistle, Natasha prepared to exit the hospital as though she were but dust in the wind, a mere afterthought to those currently present. Of course, a nurse exclaiming the name "Natsumi!" was enough to draw her attention from heaven's gates - the hospital's exit - prompting her to turn her gaze toward the door the nurse stepped through.

Conflicted between freedom and curiosity, the southern sharpshooter gave in to curiosity's beckoning call, much to her chagrin. After all, it couldn't be... could it? Entering behind the nurse, she found that even with all the bandages layering the young lady's body, the rowdy individual arguing with her current caretaker was undoubtedly... Natsumi Asakura.

"...Natsu?"

The nurse looked around the room for the jello, but saw nothing! It was too ‘cleverly’ hidden in the drawer to her side. Rolling her eyes, the nurse stomped out of the room. Natsumi pretended to keep watching TV until the nurse vanished. She hadn’t noticed the other person standing there. She reached for the drawer and heard her name called. Natsumi froze and looked back over her shoulder. It wasn’t her ‘name,’ but the nickname that only a few called her now, and ‘she’ was standing there.

“Natasha?” There was a rush of relief and excitement, but the memories of their last meeting kept her from acting. Natsumi fought off and hid the the excitement deep down, opening the drawer and pulling out the three cups of jello that she stole. She placed each carefully on the hospital blankets, her legs circling them to hide her bounty from onlookers. She took a big bite and spoke at Nat with her mouth full. "What're you doin' here? Ain't this place only for the sick'n hurt?"

"Hey now, that's my line, sweetheart. For a while, I was hurt, too. Ended up suffering major damage after my battle in Africa. I survived, as you can certainly see, but barely. The bastard me and my partner ended up contendin' with? Let's just say he was monstrous enough to force us to retreat. When we came back, both of us were severely injured, and unlike my friend, Lady Fortune wasn't callin' my name as much as I'd well like, so I had to bite the bullet and rest in bed until I was fully healed."

To be certain, Natasha wanted to know why Natsumi of all people, cautionary as she was, ended up in this hospital. Even if she left her household on poor terms, Natasha wasn't exactly all that bright-eyed to see her confined to a bed with her body wrapped in bandages. Moving toward the young woman, occupying a seat at her bedside, Natasha ruffled her hair as she scrutinized her appearance with questioning hazels, a worried glint present in her eyes.

"Enough about me, though. I wanna know why yer here of all places. What happened to you, honey?"

There it was, that ‘sweetheart’ and talkin’ to Natsumi all mother-like. It was easy to bring Natsumi’s guard down when she felt that unfamiliar warmth of family. She still didn’t even know how to define it for herself. She just shoved more jello into her mouth to give her a chance to think about her reply. However, she wasn’t expecting to hear all of that. Natasha had gone to war and fought one of those monsters, was injured, but got home alive. Natsumi felt the guilt rising up, but pushed it back down. It’s not like that was any bit her fault. She scarfed the rest of one jello cup.

Natsumi refused to fully look toward Natasha as the woman sat down. Was awkward in the silence, but Natsumi didn’t know what to say. She wasn’t exactly prepared to meet up with Natasha ever again. “Guy tried killin’ me. Got shot a few times, normal battle stuff, I guess.” Natsumi kept her head lowered, staring into the jello of her second stolen serving. “Brought me here stead’a finishin’ me off.”

Each revelation was fairly disheartening to hear, truth be told. No matter how distant they'd grown from one another, the idea that Natsumi nearly died was a difficult pill to swallow, though the indifference she displayed about the affair hardly made matters any easier. Furrowed eyebrows were a telltale sign of her disappointment at her words. Even so, she maintained a listening ear, silently contemplating her next course of action.

Whoever brought her here was probably long gone by now, eliminating the likelihood of revenge by a long shot. Judging from the bandages, her pursuer was likely aiming for a quick kill. But then, what was the point in bringing her here? Was it a warning shot that portended something worse in the distant future?

Groaning softly at the whirlwind of questions spinning through her head, Natasha pulled a bag of brownies from her duffle bag. Comfort food would be her guide here moving forward, it seemed. Biting into the chocolate treat to temporarily numb her growing irritation, Natasha leaned at her bedside in a slump of exasperation.

"Sheesh. For someone who nearly lost their life, you seem pretty unfazed. I wouldn't exactly call a near-death experience 'normal battle stuff', honey. Ain't nothin' normal bout death."

Ain’t nothin’ normal bout death…

This was a lesson Natsumi was trying to wrap her head around, but each time she tried understanding it, she thought back to the many other kids she was forced to face over the years. Too many faces with fear in their eyes came to mind. Too many slumped bodies covered in blood and those ugly white outfits they all wore. They were all dead, and Natsumi is the one who did most of that. For Natsumi, death was normal and common and easy to inflict. But Natasha always said otherwise…

Natsumi finally found the strength to look up from her jello and at Natasha, though there was very little of the sweet young childish girl in her eyes. She seemed distant, her thoughts in other places far from here. “I’ve almost died lots of times,” Natsumi said. “It’s all the same each time it happens. Something hurts, white coat fix me up, and I go out to do it again. Just don’ get why I was brought back here. Figure it much easier to kill me. Duvalier probably gon’ have him killed now.”

"Stubborn as always, I see. Bless your heart. I commend you for bein' such a strong soldier about this ordeal. I really do."

The disappointment in her expression persisted. Consuming chocolate was a vain effort in the end, and once she recognized that fact, she simply set the bag of baked goods on a table. The thought of death without accomplishment was a notion she detested with every fiber of her soul.

Facing death in that continent filled with madness, was, the second time she felt fear. True fear. Fear that made the stomach turn. Fear that made her detest her purpose. Natasha didn't believe a single word that flowed from her lips. The distant expression was a mask. Much to Natsumi's dismay, though, Natasha was a persistent lady. This wasn't her first rodeo, anyway. Liltotto was equally stubborn about being honest about her true feelings.

"Did you ever stop to think that things were different now? Look, nothing can wash away the past completely. I get that. I know that more than anybody else. But, for a moment, did it ever dawn on you how anybody would have felt if you died that day? I'm not talking about the men in white coats, the assassin who nearly took you out, They can burn in fire and brimstone for all I care."

Natasha leaned further into the bedside, rolling over so that they weren't all that far apart in distance. Crossing her arms, a stern frown crossed against her lips.

"I mean people like us. Kenichi. My father. The family I wanted to build for you. If you can sit here and tell me that didn't mean anything on the verge of death, then we don't have anything else to speak about."

Natasha’s words hit different. They made Natsumi sad and feel guilty. She didn’t like those feelings. Natsumi kept turning her head away, the cup of jello laying loosely in her hands and threatening to tip over in the bed. As Natasha kept on though, Natsumi’s hands re-gripped that cup, and as her fingers tightened, the plastic bent in her hands, cracking when they got too tight. The crack triggered her.

“Stop it!” Natsumi yelled and threw the jello across the room. A nurse tried running in, but Natsumi slammed the door in her face and yelled for her to stay out. The angry young woman had tears in her eyes as she looked back to Natasha. “It ain’t like no one cares about me or anythin’! Stop fakin'! Kenichi don’t stick around even if I want ‘im to. And you go out’n replace me with that stupid urchin! Don’t try to pretend like you care! If you did, that stupid boy woulda never showed up! You didn’t even ask. I ask everythin’ cause that be what people tellin' me is polite, but you just bring a whole new person. Ain't interested in bein' second to some stupid boy!”

"Who do you think ya are accusin' me of faking affection, little girl? Honey, everything I felt for you in our time together was never fake. Frankly, I'm quite offended that you'd say that, but let me fix that silly pair of lenses yer starin' through right now because apparently, you can't see how terrible this makes me feel. After that, if you want to still be upset, fine. If you don't want to come back, fine. But I'm owed my peace, and my peace I will speak."

Natasha's tone was firm, her expression resolute. Those hazel eyes, commonly warm and kind, were filled with a defiant radiance. Radiance encompassing resolve and the will of a woman who could no longer tolerate those she cared for telling her what they wanted to believe, those who were so blinded by misguided perceptions. Rising over her, those fierce eyes bore down on Natsumi, as though daring her to continue with this line of foolishness, prepared to shoot down every accusation she intended to bring to the table.

"Let's set the record straight, sugar. I ain't the spittin' image of perfect. I messed up. Even with me bein' 3 years or so away from forty, I'm allowed to make mistakes. And you know what? You're allowed to be upset with those mistakes. That's yer right as a human being, and I get it. I know I messed up. I didn't communicate, assumed you might've loved the idea of havin' someone else to interact with when I'm away, might've found a kindred spirit in a young man who was strugglin' in life just like you."

Natasha paid no heed to the voices that were likely calling out from the door as a result of Natsumi's action. If anything, they were secondary compared to the expression pouring out from her soul. At this moment, nothing else mattered other than setting the goddamn record straight.

"That lousy notion of "being replaced" is nothin' but a load of bull. I might be a recoverin' alcoholic, I might be a terrible excuse for playin' the role of the mother I never got to be. Hell, I might even be a foolish ol' fighter who doesn't win when it matters most, but as god as my witness, I never faked the love and compassion I felt for you. And I don't fake the love and compassion I feel for him."

Through an impassioned voice, Natasha allowed all of her admissions to flow freely. Where she set before a crowd, the passion of her voice and the weight of her words would have doubtlessly resonated with those who could relate to faltering along the way in life. She was no stranger to mistakes.

Hell, as far as she was concerned, she had made so many that she convinced herself that she was nothing more than a walk-behinder. An individual who, by all accounts, may as well be satisfied with scraps, better suited to occupying a role in the background. She was tired of letting the people she loved decide their meaning to her and the life she occupied now. To HELL with that. She was done with that way of life.

"Let me tell ya somethin', baby. I've come to love you like the daughter I never had. That so-called urchin' was prepared to go lookin' for you because he felt bad about a mistake I made, but stayed behind to look over me while I was busy nursin' my wounds in the hospital. My father's been worried sick about you. Hell, I bet all the money I own if I called Kenny right now, that young man would be here faster than a cheetah doped up with Red Bull and adrenaline."

Natasha took a deep breath, shaking her head as her expression softened, and those hazel eyes slowly but surely began to fill with tears. Even if she wanted to be firm, the motherly affection she held for Natsumi still shined through.

"I ain't askin' you to play second fiddle to him. I ain't askin' you to play nice and get along with him, either. Goddamit, honey, I just want you to know that yer loved, cherished more than anything else in this world. I almost lost you without bein' granted the chance to protect ya, and it hurts me thinkin' I would have been okay with that. As you can see, I'm not."