Staring At Clouds. Forms Like Bygone Memories. [Shirohime, Open]

"You're right. We do. I know that for a fact, because I'm of the generation that failed you all. It's my fault that we live in this dystopia."

She didn't complain when people hated her, even if it was for the wrong reasons of being scared of her mysterious air and haughty appearance. Regardless of the reasons why, people were entitled to hate one of the people who failed in keeping the world safe and for the degradation into this current predicament.

If only she could turn back time, even though she could do that - she could never repair what had been done because trying is what had brought her to this state in the first place. Trying to break her limits was the point where every bit of her body broke apart and sealed her to this inevitability.

"That's why.. I want to fix my mistake. I just want everyone to be happy again, I want everyone to exist in their realms and make the best of it without bloodshed. I want... peace."

Alastair's head tipped sideways, his gaze falling from the sky above to land firmly on Shirohime. She hardly seemed like one of the powerful few, given that she had nigh collapsed in a backstreet and appeared to lack the constitution to even stand unaided. Still, perhaps it was the price of trying that had exerted such a toll upon her body.

"If the young only blamed their problems upon the old and did not seek solutions for themselves then nothing would ever be achieved. Perhaps your generation did fail, but you are still here and doing what you can, right? That means a lot more than you might think."

Should he really be encouraging her, given the state she was in? He did not truly know, though he also knew so very little about her. Perhaps a few words of encouragement would go a long way, or they were just drops in a vast ocean. Either way, he had lost nothing for saying them and he meant it. There was a nobility in standing in defiance of one's self that he had taken to heart, perhaps Shirohime felt the same in her own way.

"A lasting peace would be a nice change of pace, a chance to bring some semblance of order back to far corners of the world. But it is only a dream, at least for me. Whatever your mistake was, Shirohime, if it is within my means then I would be happy to help you fix it."

"The young should never have been given an unsolvable solution in the first place by their predecessors. I'm doing nothing. I'm too feeble to do anything and yet my wishes are enough to count for doing something."

She complained bitterly to no one in particular. Her frustrations just bubbling to the surface again.

"My mistake is this world. My mistake is everywhere, as long as people are aware of the spiritual realm and suffer for it. That's my error so tell me, how would you do to fix my mistake?"

It was not a sharp comment directed at him. If anything she was searching for genuine advice from him as to how to go about it.

Her words, sharp as daggers, took him by surprise as they suddenly launched into his side. Even still, he could tell - or rather chose to believe - that they were only so harsh for her sake not his own. It must be frustrating to have become like that and still remember when you were something more.

"Maybe not. But the second it becomes a matter of rewriting the past then you are wasting your time on the truly impossible. If you cannot see a path to a solution then perhaps it is a matter of perspective."

His brow furrowed as she spoke at last of the truth of her woes, or some sizeable part of them anyway. It was certainly a little beyond his station to consider matters of the entire world, and that made him consider once more exactly who she was. Such a thing was not something just about anyone went around spouting, rather quite the opposite, and yet she often spoke in wistful thoughts and distant memories. It all meant something, he knew it, but there were so many blank spaces left to fill.

"I cannot fix the world, I do not know if anyone ever could alone. Or if they should. Instead, we should focus on reducing that suffering. A broad statement, I know, but it is our best path forward. I would like to think that is the goal of the Vandenreich, and so we are never alone in that mission. If one cannot stand then another can do so in their place."

"Rewriting the past is pointless, yes. Though with enough time any collective of people will forget about the spiritual realm and call it mere folklore just like how it was four-hundred years ago. The power to rewrite the world is not as impossible as you believe. Whether we want it or not, the power that a small group command is enough to reshape the world multiple times over."

She inhaled sharply for a minute, she was technically among the people that rewrote the laws of reality. Mazda was proof of that, perhaps she was even more dangerous that people that changed the world on their own due to her ability to turn other people into what she described. The maker was sometimes worse than the monsters they created.

"You can. You can assist in aiding the people that can. You already do so just by supporting the Vandenreich. The restoration of the natural order and the end of suffering - that eternal peace is what you strive towards but.. I can see the heroic quality of you. You're not like me when I was younger, you want to help even the people you don't see and will never know. The problem with being a hero, you'll eventually find yourself at odds with those beliefs and you'll be filled with regret and wondering what it might be like if you never chose that path."

Shirohime shared while coughing a little. She hoped that he wasn't pushed away by that.

"And therein lies a difference in our perspectives. You speak like you have seen these impossible things, lived through them, and, though I am not inclined to doubt you, I have not. As best I know, this small group of individuals powerful enough to rewrite the history books rarely see eye-to-eye. Hence we are still here and not enjoying eternal peace or utter damnation."

The notion of cutting off the spiritual realm from their own was not something he had ever remotely considered, not that he had mused too much on matters of such grandiose scale. He saw the immediate benefits to which she was no doubt referring and a path to the peace that she promised, but, on the other hand, his mind immediately went to thoughts of the spirits that had taken up residence on Earth and were getting permanently evicted by such a process. No doubt she knew more than he, but right now his heart could not condone such a choice.

It was funny, though, that she was not the first to call him a hero. Was it all that heroic to dream of a better world and be ready to fight for it? Perhaps it was when he framed it so egotistically.

"What were you like, then? It appears I wear my heart on my sleeve, for you already have such a fine read on me. Though I might as well add that, hero or not, regret has a funny way of catching up with us anyway. Maybe I would rather regret my actions than my inactions."

"One day, your perspective will change. Maybe not today though."

She mused and brought her eyes from the heavens and back to looking at the masses of people going about their day. Some giving queer looks at the duo sitting on the ground against a building but most being so focused on things they cared more about that the two of them got ignored just as much.

"What was I like?"

It was painful to remember that, it's why she never committed to entertaining people when they asked about her. At least not giving them specifics. After all Shirohime, white princess, was ultimately just a moniker rather than a name that she was born with. There was very little besides that to it and so Shirohime answered in the most peculiar way she could.

"She was nothing like Shirohime."

Referring to herself in third person and by name, it didn't cross her mind to explain any further. The two of them might as well be considered seperate people at this point - even those that spent so much time with her and cared so much about her would struggle to put a name to this person she had become. Their goals were the same but the process was completely different. There was bitterness and pain that made her consider the things she used to with less regard. Things that can be moved to the wayside to support that obsession.

He could have predicted such an enigmatic answer from a mile away, but it had not stopped him from asking all the same. He saw those distant looks, the hollow nature of her gaze, and it reminded him of a different woman who was in such a great amount of pain. He had tried to aid that woman then, but Shirohime's issues seemed to run far deeper. Reida wore a mask but screamed for help beneath it, there was no such feeling from Shirohime.

"A shame then. I wonder if she would have minded if I kept her company, just as you do not?"

Sighing softly, he turned his attention to her and their surroundings. It was true that they were hardly inconspicuous, even if few were paying them any real heed, but he now felt obligated to ask just a little more. Something more direct than he usually might, but perhaps there was the slightest of hints to be gained.

"Were you heading anywhere particular today? I can escort you if you would like, consider it the least I can do to repay you for humouring my prying."

She would have not. Once upon a time she was plain, just like any other girl. Bright eyed, innocent and kind. Violence never sat well with her but that's why she was here in this moment still, to end that violence. Just because someone had a bad start to life didn't mean that she was doomed to be a bad person. It was being a good person that lead her down this path eventually.

"I don't remember where I was going, sorry."

After a moment of thought she responded with the same curiousity, as pointless as it would be considering she'd struggle to remember the finer details of this talk later.

"Where were you going?"

There was no need to wonder whether that was a coincidental case of memory loss or not, Alastair knew he would not get an actual answer regardless. Her absentmindedness did not seem outwardly malicious though if she knew and was not telling him then it was because he did not need to know, else she had genuinely forgotten but did not want to make a scene of it. Better to press forwards and let sleeping dogs lie.

"There is a small park a few blocks along from here, with a nice view across the city. I was heading there to relax and enjoy a little bit of peace away from prying eyes."

That was one of his truths, and there was a beauty in its simplicity. Being alone with his thoughts had once been his true comfort, but now and then he did not mind the company. More so he found himself leaning toward the latter of late, as heavier thoughts were wont to creep in under the radar.

"You are more than welcome to join me if you wish, unless you are fine here?"