Resolve to Protect; To Never Fail Again [PRIVATE: Arianda/Ulv]

So much had happened recently... so much in just the span of just a few weeks; so sudden that Arianda truly had a hard time with how much had happened in general. Ari got a girlfriend she genuinely and truly would love to settle down with. However, after certain events Arianda had felt so utterly powerless. It wasn't the loss of her Eris Powers; she had already come to terms that she did not need those to be powerful. She WAS powerful on her own; she simply lost access to what made her The Angel of Conflict. But, she was now but a fallen angel, searching for a way to get stronger; searching for a way to protect her family. To protect her home and those she loved. After all, when push came to shove, Arianda couldn't do a single thing.

Which was why Arianda's knuckles rapped soundly on Ulv's door; knocking quite soundly in a distinct pattern. Nothing crazy, but, she knocked quickly four times, with two slower knocks following. Afterwards, she would simply wait. Her purpose for coming here wasn't entirely clear; not even to herself. However, the demon knew what she needed to. Ulv had once told her about something called "Tulpa"; something she had never intended to pursue due to how, as Ulv said, it conflicted with the power of death. However, Arianda was without her control over DE; without her powers of Eris. Yes, Amphilogiai was still with her, as the Child of Eris did not wish to leave Ari; but Ari now only had a burn upon her stomach to remind her of the seal she had shattered. A burn that would soon fade away like nothing. It could leave a scar, but, she did not care. For Ari was here not for that.

Arianda came to learn of the Tulpa because she needed to be stronger; she wished to protect her family and the place in which she lived. After all, even if others would always be stronger than her; she completely refused to be unable to protect what was precious to her. So here Arianda came, to Ulv; to learn of a way to protect that would never fall. To protect like the walls of a fortress.

Frankly speaking, anger wasn't exactly the last thing Ari expected from Ulv; but it certainly wasn't entirely expected to be the first thing she encountered upon the door opening. It caused her to jump a tiny bit from Ulv's sharp tone, but, she soon let out an apologetic sounding sigh and lowered her head; simply letting Ulv berate her. Eventually, when the woman stopped, Arianda looked up at Ulv with a small frown; since when was coming to Ulv her backup? If that was so, then Ari wouldn't be here at all. She would have found some other method.

"I cannot see how you are a backup, Ulv; for if you were, I wouldn't be here. A backup is just that; a backup. I wouldn't have come if I believed you to be a backup; a fail safe for if things went wrong. Indeed, my relationship with Mirja and you has been rocky at best; but must you really think I place you so lowly on the totem pole?"

Arianda let out a tiny sigh before she looked at Ulv, thinking of all those times she could have learned new powers; new things. All she could do was let out a morose chuckle.

"I never learned anything for I was a demon trapped in arrogance, believing the powers I had were absolute; were all I needed. To say the least, I was settling. But, I settle no more because in near dying, that was fun, by the way; I learned to not be an arrogant ignoramus and actually ask for your assistance instead of presuming I don't need assistance from my friend."

After the demon finished speaking, staring at Ulv for a long time. The truth was, Ulv probably could easily sense the shift in Ari after everything that happened in Minatumi; maybe not entirely emotionally or physically, but she could tell the shift in the demon's energy. There would likely still be a hint of Mana's residual influence, as that would be difficult to purge thanks to how deeply some things bound themselves to Ari; but the fact remained that Arianda no longer had the powers related to her Eris Seal and DE. Not to mention, her eyes were steely and full of anger... but not towards Ulv; likely towards Ari herself thanks to her recent failure to do more than shiver on the ground with Amphy.

"Maybe to you, my reasons will never seem other than selfish; But I had failed to protect my city, my daughter, and the things that mattered to me. As far as I'm concerned, if I am being selfish; then I don't give a damn. Because I do NOT want to fail again; I want to be able to protect them all. But my only question is... What say you?"

The demon's eye twitched in irritation. She bit back an angry retort before she glared at Ulv; the much smaller woman still able to create a rather nice glare. Albeit, ulv was not one to be affected by Ari's glares. Regardless, the demon did her utmost not to retort at Ulv cruelly for basically telling her to die; or at least to try it. That was something Ari didn't wish to do anytime soon; or ever.

"Algos is the least of my worries, Ulv. She already got the shit kicked out of her by someone else, and has already tried to make amends for the dumb things she did; I am NOT here because of Algos. I am NOT here because of her invasion, I'm here because I fucking FAILED to do anything more than shiver on the ground, Ulv! I couldn't protect anyone or anything!"

Arianda took a step closer to Ulv. Arrogant or lazy, whatever Ari was; she wasn't going to take Ulv turning her away just because she feels like Ari is treating her like nothing more than a last resort. Truly, it was what was annoying her the most. Indeed, Arianda didn't go to Ulv or Mirja in the past because of some arrogance; and a bit of laziness. Back then, she never felt a need to do so. Why bother when Arianda had believed herself to be just fine the way she was; especially when Arianda had not wished to let go of her powers... Now was different. She had learned to not be so close minded in a true near death experience. After all, dying is easy; living is harder.

"It was never a matter of anyone 'challenging' me Ulv; nor was it a matter of not doing anything. Frankly speaking, I've wandered around the entire damn planet just because I didn't know what to do and wished to see new places; the root problem is that I do not like fighting if I can avoid it. Ironic, hm? A woman who called herself the "angel of conflict" dislikes fighting~"

Arianda sighed softly and stared at Ulv, who was likely still giving her deluxe Ulv stare. Frankly speaking, Arianda came here for Ulv's help; she had someone she wished to protect beyond anything. Not just her daughter, who could more than handle herself now; but also Kita.

"Listen... You can believe me, be annoyed with me, and want to hit me all you want; but whether you believe me or not, I DO wish to better myself. I have s-someone I wish to be better for; someone I wish to protect more than anything. And it's not just Caly... Ulv, I came here for your help. While yes, some of it is for me but... I don't wanna lose her."

Arianda, of course, was talking about Kita. However, the demon didn't simply reveal such things; as she was certain Ulv would make fun of her or screw with the demon. She had no idea how Ulv would react; but to reject Ari on the premise that she's simply buying a gun because she got mugged, then she possibly did not understand how Ari felt right now. After all, she didn't wish to retaliate; she wished to protect.

Arianda scowled at Ulv some. Frankly, to Ari, it felt like both people were trying to get two different points across and neither party was taking either side. Arianda frowned some and sighed softly; shaking her head gently. At least Ulv called Ari friend, but she just wanted Ulv's help; and maybe Ari would revert back to her old ways of relaxing and being a huge derp. But right now...

"Do you really think I would believe I couldn't be hurt after nearly being torn apart by the destruction of Death Energy in my body? Of course I can hurt myself; of course I am not a being prone to surviving great amounts of damage. I know that, now more than ever..."

Arianda sighed softly, seemingly deflated as if whatever anger had been fueling the demon had somewhat subsided and faded; or at least she was letting herself be far less proud. Whatever it was, Arianda seemed to have relaxed some.

"Wouldn't the fact that I came here to ask for your help mean I wish to be better? Why would I want to regress into my same old ways? Especially given the fact I have people I want to protect in this world; people I want to be better for."

Arianda sighed, slumping to sit on the air; now floating in front of Ulv as she looked at the woman. She had to forget her irritation, forget her pride for a moment and just look at Ulv and think. Think about what she wanted; think about who she wished to protect. She looked at Ulv and sighed.

"I do wish to become better; honest. I just don't know how. And, Ulv; I feel like I failed when Algos came and attacked Minatumi. I've... talked with Algos. I can't properly say that Algos was the reason I made this choice; because she wasn't. Maybe you believe it to be so; but I don't."

The demon seemed to stare past Ulv and, for the first time since coming to Ulv's door; Arianda looked truly tired. After all, when a demon breaks a seal, breaks a mark given to them by another demon; the consequences can be quite tiring. Regardless, she hummed softly as she continued to float in front of Ulv.

"Ulv, I don't know what I can do to get you to believe I truly to wish to be better for the sake of myself, and the sake of those I care for; but I can at least try. After all, what I want to learn from you is something you offered me when you helped me move to Minatumi..."

The demon continued to stare off into space for a few more moments before her gaze lost it's dreamy state; and her silver eyes focused hard on Ulv. Indeed, she would probably get turned away because Ulv did not wish to be responsible for her friend getting harmed; but Ari felt she could not wait. Strength was not on her mind, power was not her desire; the sole ability to protect those she cared for with some form of shield is what she desired. She wished to protect and be better; not only for herself but for those she loved. And, especially, for Kita.

"Ulv, if it is not my choice to be here, then I suppose it will never be. But, contrary to what you say; I honestly do wish to be better. Even if nothing I do will convince you of such, nothing you say will cause me to believe that I am not doing this to better myself."

Arianda looked at Ulv. She was, in all honesty, disappointed. Not in Ulv, but in the fact that Ulv still believed Ari to be unready. In fact, she probably was. After all, the demon was tired; her being had nearly shattered when Algos decided to attack. Since then, she hadn't gotten a lot of rest... And had only really eaten chocolate. A comfort food, really. Daily feedings of minor bits of pain in Minatumi wasn't really good anymore; maybe a proper meal would be good... She should probably try her hand at cooking again. Maybe flour wouldn't explode in her face.

Indeed, maybe she was under no obligation or expectation to do what she wished to do; but that didn't matter to her. The little demon sniffed softly, her gaze unfocusing again before she felt Ulv's hand upon her cheek; and the name of her lover leave the woman's lips. Arianda blinked at Ulv, listening to what she said before letting out a small chuckle.

"I shoulda known you would already know about Kita... Alright, I'll go home. And I probably look shattered because breaking a demonic mark is nothing to sneeze at. But... I will go home. I don't think I've slept properly since that day..."

Arianda looked at Ulv, searching her eyes for an answer she didn't know the question for; and then the demon floated forwards gently and gave Ulv a warm hug. Probably the warmest and tightest hug she had ever given the women during her time here. Truthfully, if not for the storm of emotion that was Ari; she would feel much better than she ever had in years.

After a few moments of that hug, Arianda pulled away from Ulv and lowered herself to the ground; humming as she looked up at the woman once more. Arianda still did wish to learn a Tulpa but... she would be no use to anyone if she was tired; and especially if she wasn't able to properly recover from this event. She smiled at Ulv, a true genuine smile that at least showed Ari was feeling a bit better than when she came; even if she was a tiny bit disappointed.

"You should come over for dinner sometime and meet Kita... When she's more settled in that is. And probably after I've made up abouuut a years worth of sleep~"

The demon giggled softly to herself before she gave Ulv that smile once more; turning around intent to leave the house and return home. Of course, if Ulv stopped her; she would stay. Otherwise, the demon would leave Ulv with a smile and a hug; and head on her way home to spend time with Kita. And sleep. She deeefinitely needed sleep.