Bleach Platinum Hearts RP
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Yaksha
Yaksha
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Joined : 2016-11-13
Posts : 561

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Requesting a Do-Over Empty Requesting a Do-Over

Sun Apr 23, 2017 12:41 pm
Requesting a Do-Over QerxJ3c

» Name Of Character: Shio Mora

» Link To Character: https://www.platinumhearts.net/t17417-shio-mora-approved-5-4#112630

» Upgrading: Adding the following to the racial power section:

Ember Sight - As his zanpakuto spirit is a being of smoke and wax, Shio has long since grown accustomed to the presence of haze and particulate matter. He's able to see through most forms of smoke and mist with little to no trouble; indeed, he often opens many fights by creating obscuring mists to protect himself from assault.

Bakudo Specialization - Shio excels at defeating and subduing enemies without lethal force, either using his zanpakuto or his kido skills. Though he rarely makes use of it, Shio is quite skilled at ending encounters with a minimum of risk and bloodshed.

Hardened Durability - Perhaps due to his intense history of abuse up to now, or perhaps owing to his own trainings in his spare time, Shio's body is incredibly hardened, covered in scar tissue and burn marks. It can be very difficult to down the shinigami once he's decided to fight seriously.

And this to the sealed powers section:

Marking - Shio's zanpakuto is able to release pleasant smells, often serving as simple distractions and useful markers for his allies, in the event that they're separated. These scents change based on his mood, and can be transmitted to that which his zanpakuto touches as he wills it.

Mucilization - Shio's blade is constantly covered in a thin layer of wax, which flakes off and covers objects cut by it. The rate of propogation is proportional to the damage of the wound, meaning a slit throat will typically lead to complete petrification within moments, while a nick will simply coat the wounded limb over a minute. Enemies can remove the wax with brute force or applications of heat, making it primarily useful for slowing down enemies that are fast, but relatively weak.

Smoke Contrails - By striking his tanto against the sheath, Shio is able to break off the thin layer of wax there, nullifying the Mucilization power until he sheathes it once more. While the wax is gone, the blade gives off a faint bit of heat, roughly equivalent to a candle's flame; just enough to cause mild second degree burns, and burn paper or wood. It also leaves behind small puffs of smoke as it moves, allowing Shio to create a small degree of cover with a series of reckless slashes.

The only way to remove the scents from those things struck is to disarm Shio's zanpakuto, or to have him strike them a second time, negating the scent he's previously put on them. This however, must be a deliberate act; the scent will only disappear if Shio wills it, meaning even accidental friendly fire isn't sufficient to end the marking effect.

And this to the shikai section:
Wax Shackles - If Shio's blade strikes an enemy at any point while in its molten state, the targeted area is covered in a thick layer of wax, restricting movement, and defending them from attacks.
This can be used on allies or himself as well, to shield the afflicted area from a blow, but he has no inherent way to remove the wax on his own body, or his allies.

Improved Ember Sight - While attuned with his zanpakuto, Shio is not only able to see through smoke without effort, he's even able to use the smoke itself to see, treating each individual mote of smoke as an eye. To use this he must close his eyes and determine a particular area which he's choosing to see through.

Wax Clone - If he so wishes, Shio is able to create a clone of his wax instead of altering his weapon; in order to do so, he must spend one post preparing the clone, and one post creating it. After this, a pale white, immobile clone of his own body forms wherever his zanpakuto is touching. These clones are rarely capable of fooling intelligent opponents, but can serve as useful shields to hide behind, and in circumstances where the enemy has their sight impeded, can easily absorb a stray blow.

Smoke Cloud - Available only if Shio has maintained the same form on his zanpakuto for two or more posts, Shio is able to swing his blade around in an enormous circle, creating heavy, choking smoke that smells however he wishes. It's very dense and very hot, making it difficult to move through as if those inside were underwater. Even Shio isn't immune to this effect, meaning he rarely uses it unless he needs to buy himself time to create a suitable defense.

If possible, I'd also like to have it essentially be treated as if these had been present for the initial grading, as I've only really used him in a single thread since creation, and it didn't go anywhere really; even if I only get to start at 5-1 instead of 5-4, it's plenty good enough for me.

» Why: I had a very poor understanding of how things worked on PH when I made him, and I've been having trouble figuring out exactly where to start the training process on a character who doesn't want to train. I've patched it up, and I'm hoping now I can get a little momentum going.

» Extra: Don't intend to repeat this mistake again.

Sage
Sage
Lord of the Understream
Lord of the Understream
s_e stuff
Joined : 2013-11-04
Posts : 2340

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Platinum Points:
Requesting a Do-Over Left_bar_bleue74095/100000Requesting a Do-Over Empty_bar_bleue  (74095/100000)
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Requesting a Do-Over Empty Re: Requesting a Do-Over

Thu Apr 27, 2017 9:41 pm
[mod]Pretty good stuff, actually, and is in good matching to the rest of the content in your app. Nothing here is blatantly out of left field, and while some descriptions are a tad vague on certain parametres, I'm trusting that you won't be abusing any of those abilities which aren't as strictly defined as some others, especially since you've made clear some limitations or countering applications for a lot of the techniques.

That being said, you can go ahead and add this into your app, and I'll approve Shio with a new tier of 3-5, meaning he won't be able to access his shikai yet, but it still helps a lot to make the prodigious aspect of your character more apparent with this tier upgrade. Keep in mind this probably won't be happening again, especially since you've established that you won't be making mistakes in misjudging your target level of strength and what's offered in your app.[/mod]


Requesting a Do-Over 8Bvy1N8


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