Yuki Tsuchimoto [WIP]

Basics

Name: Yuki Tsuchimoto
True Age: 20
Gender: Female
Personality:
Playful: Yuki is a playful young girl, she is childish and immature but loves games and annoying people. She has been known to play pranks on everyone and anyone and loves to play games, her innocent nature is a weakness although she loves to be a child and never wants to grow up in case of losing this playful side of herself.

Cunning: Despite her young age Yuki possesses incredible reserves of knowledge and is quite skilled in manipulating people or tricking them. She does this to play pranks on others as well as manipulate them into doing what she wants. She lacks intelligence such as high level maths or science however she should not be underestimated when dealing with manipulation and messing with people's heads.

What's yours is mine: Being born with nothing Yuki grew up as a thief and as such she has a way of if she can't get what she wants she will happily steal it. She is quite nimble and good with her fingers as she can easily slip into people pockets or pouches. If you have something she wants she will quite happily attempt to steal it although if she is at risk of getting caught she will usually drop it and hightail it out of there.

Sugiura Class: Normal Sugiura

General Appearance

Appearance:
Animalistic Traits: Yuki has traits which are similar to a Kitsune. She is capable of hiding them although she has fox-like ears and a tail. These ears give her a heightened sense of hearing although this is as much as benefit as it is a hindrance as loud noises easily hurt her ears. Her tail is also very sensitive. Her tail and ears a a pure white like her hair.
Appearance Age: Child, 8-12 years old.
Height: 1.2 metres.
Weight: 49 kilograms.

Natural Abilities

Techinques:

Fox-Fire Manipulation: Yuki is a capable user of "fox-fire", it is granted to her by her guardian beast who is a Kitsune which is why the link between this grew. Yuki is capable of conjuring this fire to her hands and basically anywhere around her within five metres although it is often seen being formed near her tail or in her hands.

The fire itself is a light blue, it is a mystical colour which just from looking at it someone can tell it isn't normal fire. The strange fire has very little traits which differ from normal fire although it is strange in the sense that unless she wills it the fire will not go out, although someone with superior power could overpower her fire and as such extinguish it.

Illusion Practitioner: A basic ability among the myths of the Kitsune Yuki also earned this ability from her guardian beast, it allows her to mentally inflict illusions on others of any description through touch, an example would be that Yuki could cast an illusion to make her target see things in the corner of their sight, small things which despite being weak could lead to paranoia although through touch she can do other things, she could make them hear things for a moment if she is concentrated she could even begin using her touch to make it feel like something else is touching them like a knife or even nothing. The possibilities are endless although Yuki is able to be overpowered by those with higher willpower/mental strength or mental deduction.

Shape-shifting: The final ability her guardian has given her is the ability of shape-shifting, it as well is known as an ability Kitsune wield and Yuki can do it too. Her shape-shifting is divided into three stages which are levels, she cannot go higher than her level of training and knowledge. Yuki is currently at a beginner level although she can use this ability to hide her fox traits no matter what the level of her skill is.

Beginner: At the beginner level Yuki can change small aspects of her being, such things would be small and simple like fingerprint changes or hair manipulation which allows her to bypass biometric locks. This level doesn't allow for full body changes although it allows Yuki to manipulate her age effectively.

Adolescent:

Adult:

Advanced: At the advanced level Yuki can change all aspects of her physical self, such things would be like changing gender or eyes, even completely different appearances which can easily distract or confuse people, aside from that it is the same as the beginner level. Her eyes allow he to now bypass retina scanners through changing her eye to another person's algorithm she must have seen it before to get the image.

Ultimate: The ultimate level is the highest level of Yuki's ability. It allows her to reconstruct her genetic code as a whole, she could use it in a variety of ways such as turning her arm into an armoured weapon, she could change her body to a peak physical condition and even further to have aspects of other natures; eagle eyes or heightened senses is an example.

But what is most concerning is she can mimic her reiatsu and reiryoku to take on the form of something entirely new or someone else's making it sometimes impossible to distinguish if it is her or someone else. This however is flawed in the sense she needs to have sensed the reiatsu in order to mimic it.

Magic:

Scales of Orochi: This Spell, is a defensive spell, utilized and created by using the reaitsu to create a strong and dense shell, of pure spiritual energy.the shell grows into a ball shape, that emits from the user's body, then spins around like a spinning top, the most basic shell, for a normal sugiura, is able to defend against the power of cero attacks, and low level kido, attacks. If used by a high level Sugiura, the Shell, can raise it's size to the level of a miniature dome, in which the defense is that much stronger, even on the levels of the Shintensou No Enkan, or "Rho Aius" Spell. After a few post's, the user can break the shell into small mini blades, or into a few large blades, that rip through the air at piercing speeds and can detonate on impact with the opponent or even, cause a distraction, to the opponent. To learn the spell is short, but to master it takes a long time.

Shimura's Blessing: A basic healing magic, this channels the users Reiatsu into a white, slightly slow-moving substance that something can still pass through, but it will be slowed by it. This white energy can flow into the targets body, restoring both the body and the Reiatsu at the same rate until either one of them is full, after which the restoring energy focuses on the remaining aspect. This technique thus works slower than Shinigami Healing when focused on Reiatsu alone, but has a more wide-spread effect. To master the spell takes a while, but to learn the spell at its base is easy to do.

Burning Flower: An attacking magic that channels the users Reiatsu into flower-petal like objects and vibrates them until they burst into flames, and then sending them out in a circular storm-like fashion. Depending on the user, these can look like rose petals, lotus petals, or any other flower imaginable. Some are even able to shape them like thorns. Only Sugiura with either their own Reiatsu as a fire/wind/lightning or fire/wind/light Sacred or Guardian beast as their element can learn this spell.

Piercing Light: Sends out a single ray, similliar looking to light, but moving slower so that the movement can actually be seen. This move is ment to pierce a small area, perfect for pin-point attacks, but can't cause large damage, but can easily pierce through enhanced guards by energy as an example, if the person has the magical skill to make it strong enough to do that. It requires high accuracy and/or concentration to use this effectively, instead of high Reiatsu like other spells. This is another easy spell to use in battle, but a bit more difficult to master takes a longer time.

Sacred Weapon: Yuki's Sacred Weapon is that of a small dagger, the dagger is incredibly small and light. This serves two purposes as it is more concealable and lighter for her to use. The knife lacks much decoration and is quite plain, it is dull grey which doesn't reflect light. Her daggers blade length is a mere 9cm being very small.

Other Weapons: Yuki can occasionally be seen wielding a set of throwing knives, she rarely has anything which isn't concealable or heavy.

Guardian Beast

Origin: Cunning, Manipulation and Mischief. Yuki's origin is a Kitsune from Japanese and Chinese mythology, this has lead her to have many traits which she is often seen using suggesting she knows of her origin.

Guardian Beast: Húlí is the name of Yuki's guardian beast, he is a six tailed Kitsune spirit whom is much like Yuki herself, he loves to pay tricks and torment people as well as use fire and illusions. In appearance he is a simple white, with six tails which he is quite proud of and hates people trying to touch them. Húlí is about one metre tall which makes him around Yuki's height although she is still taller than him although the fox spirit has mastered shape-shifting and as such can take any form desired.

Guardian Beast's World: Húlí's world is actually completely white, nothing exists and that is because he forges the world via illusions which means that in realty nothing actually exists unless he wills it. No universe, no laws of physics, basically no anything unless he wills it.

Joushou

Joushou Appearance: Upon entering her first stage of power Yuki's eyes take on a slit appearance like a snake or cats. She can no longer hide her tail or ears and she gains a pale white aura around her which is incredibly warm. Her hair becomes more wild and hangs about we shoulders messily while her canines grow to become more fang like and she grows claws to use for swiping her opponents.
Joushou: Yuki's powers don't change much in her first state. It more so simply advances her own abilities to a higher level.

Enhanced Fox-Fire: Yuki's fox-fire now burns hotter, it is harder to extinguish as the flames use reishi in the air to burn now and water cannot quench them. Before it is still the same for those with superior reiatsu as they can smother the flames.

Enhanced Illusion Abilities Yuki's skill in illusions is only enhanced as she can easily cast illusions on someone via eye contact now. Although she still likes to make use of we more traditional means by inflicting it to all senses through the surroundings. She can now also target specific senses such as someone can taste something terrible but the taste never leaves even though it isn't there. People with higher willpower remain resistant or unaffected.

Past & Roleplay Sample

Character Background: Yuki was born in the Eastern Sugiura realm where everything was more Asian in terms of culture. She was born to a Sugiuran mother although her father is completely unknown but she gained many of his traits such as the white hair, fox traits and personality traits. When she was born disaster struck her mother and her mother died in childbirth, her father had no clue that she even existed from her mothers lack of telling him.

This lead Yuki to be taken in by Tobira Manju. Tobira was a nice man who raised her as an orphan and taught her about her heritage, he taught her about the Sugiura and what would happen as she grew up and she grew quite attached to him, she even eventually called him her father although one day when he was out he was attacked by a group of bandits and left for dead, he was a peaceful man and they injured him to the point where he succumbed to his injuries. She was devastated.

With no one left she was alone in the world, she became a street child and would have to run around stealing to survive and dodge guards and angry shop keepers. She proved to be quite successful and currently exists in the Eastern Territories simply surviving although she wishes she had someone to call family.
Roleplay Sample:
In the bustling streets of the area around her Yuki was perched on the roof of a nearby house, she had her ears pricked up and her tail too. She was alert and cautious, her ears listened to the business of those around her, she wanted food. No she needed food, she stood up after selecting a target and drew from her little top a dagger, it didn't look like much but her sacred weapon was trusty and made an excellent cut tool.

She dropped down into the street and weaves through the crowd in an expert manner, she walked past a man with a bulging pouch on his obi, it was secured by a cord and Yuki's ears stuck up in interest. She followed her target for a little until she saw what she wanted confirmed, the pouch was filled with money and she could tell as the owner gave some to a shopkeeper in his stall without a sound she crept up as her target made small talk and she pretended to slip and expertly cut the cord holding the pouch as she fell only to slip it in he long sleeves. She got up and began bowing her apology and begging forgiveness although the man just wave her away.

Well that is one more meal for little Yuki, sadly the man didn't know he'd been robbed an he was in for a surprise the next time he needed money.


General Skills
Durability: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
General Speed: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Strength: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Weapon Skill: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner


Racial Skills
Sugiura Magic: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Animal Instincts: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Martial Arts: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner
Alter Control: Master/Advanced/Adept/Beginner

• Name [X]
  
• Appropriate Age [X]
  
• Gender [X]
  
• Appearance Present [X]
  
• Appearance Described in Appropriate Length OR Picture is Visible [X]
  
• Appearance is Not Claimed [X]
  
• 10 sentences for personality [X]
  
• History is of appropriate length [O]
  
• Powers are not Godmod/Overpowered [O]
  
• Powers are described reasonably enough [O]
  
• Application/RP Sample is not in First Person [X]
  
• Skills are not filled in (Omit if a Hollow)[X]
  
• RP Sample Present (Omit if this is not the first character) [X]
  
• RP Sample is 10 sentences [X]
  

• Willpower/Determination:
  
• Mental Deduction:
  
• Pain Endurance:
  
• Focus:
  

Comments/Notes: Alright, so the very first thing that keeps me from going any further with this profile is history length. Yes, it is three sections with sentences, but the last 'paragraph' only has two sentences within it. Having the history be much further detailed and perhaps describing a few more aspects of her life that enabled her to use her Joushou along with showing maybe a bit of experience using her powers at such a young age would be beneficial.

Secondly, for the powers listed, I'll recommend a general strength for each of the abilities listed to match how experienced Yuki seems to be.

Her Fox-Fire seems to be acceptable at a base level. Anyone with a stronger reiatsu/chi/etc. or simply a large amount of water should be able to douse it.

Kitsunes typically needed many, many years under their belt in order to properly utilize illusion magic, and considering that Yuki is only 20, letting it have the ability to force people into lucid dreams seems a bit unreasonable. What should be fine is having her mess with one of the five basic senses: Touch, Taste, Smell, Sight, Hearing. The level she messes with them currently should be basic things, such as giving them the feeling of being pricked, seeing things move in the corner of their eyes, general trickster stuff at a low level. As you stated within the profile, anyone of a high Mental Deduction, Focus, or in some cases, Willpower, should be able to break out of these illusions rather easily, and those of an equal level struggling a bit. Touching them at this point should be the main way of her being able to apply her illusions unto a target.

Beginner level shape shifting seems appropriate for her at this point in time. It should require actual time to accomplish and needs focus in order to accomplish. The fingerprint change can be acceptable, along with perhaps the changing of her hair color or eye color. The one thing that should be noted is that changing the way her retina is made up should be on a level above beginner, and usually, if attempted by a beginner, leads to permanent damage to the eye. I'd suggest leaving this out of Beginner shape shifting.

Her Scales of Orochi should only have the strength to defend against multiple bala and a weak cero from someone of a similar power level to her. Asides from this, it should have the power and damaging capabilities of a low-level magical ability with the amount of damage it can cause when used as an attack listed in fuller detail.

Shimura's Blessing seems appropriate, but should require her full attention at this current level. The ability should obviously drain her of her own energy stores and can not heal exceedingly grievous wounds or afflictions applied by people who surpass her in power.

Burning Fire seems completely acceptable as is.

Piercing Light should have a limit as to how much it can currently pierce for her current level. It may be made for piercing through defenses, but she seems to be starting out weak from how the profile is made and tailored, so it should be listed that it can't pierce past defenses that far exceed her own capabilities.

Now, with criticism asides, now is a good time to choose which powers seem apt for you to keep. Starting out, typically it's only best to start with one to three powers. You may mix and match whichever sets you want, but the utmost limit for her base form should be three at her current level. If you wish for her to have more powers, then taking time to further extend her abilities and giving her a greater back story detailing how she obtained these powers and how she used them would be extremely beneficial.

Her Joushou seems fine, although for Enhanced Illusions, it should be noted that nothing major can be done to the target, and she needs to get a good look into the person's eyes so that a side-glance can't allow her to take over their senses.
Tier:N/A

I will get to it later. Edits should be done by tomorrow.

[mod]Its almost a week soon enough. I want to know if you're still working into fixing this character, so give me a PM if you are, otherwise, i'm moving it to W.I.P to save some space at the unchecked.[/mod]

[adm]Moving to WIP until @Seraphim makes the changes. [/adm]

[mod]MOVING TO INACTIVE CHARACTERS DUE TO INACTIVITY[/mod]