Bleach Platinum Hearts RP
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Teijo
Teijo
Established Member
Joined : 2011-10-28
Posts : 338
Age : 31
Location : Who knows

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Left_bar_bleue5/100Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty_bar_bleue  (5/100)
Tiers:

Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade

Sat Jan 18, 2014 12:04 pm
  • Name Of Character: Eban Alexander
  • Link To Character Profile:Link
  • Reasons For Upgrading:

    Eban is currently in training with Captain Irikio Crow, and though Eban is extremely weak this fight has been eventful to say the least. It first started with a revelation from Iriko's teachings about the true nature of Kido. Then through out the next few posts while getting he got the living hell beat out of him trying land a blow on Irikio while he was using his shikai. In the current situation though is the reasoning for why I want this, and well iriko's reasoning too. He decided to use a Kido which has put Eban in an extreme life or death situation. My plan is after a massive self revelation I want to get Eban a beginning Shikai so that he would be strong enough not to die in this situation.

    What Are You Upgrading: Shikai

    Zanpakutō Spirit Appearance:

    Shikai Appearance:

    Release: Move the planets and align the stars, Shuensha. Eban places the side of the blade of Shuensha on top of his left arm while his left arm is fully extended diagonally to his right. Once he does his blade glows brightly and separates into two spheres that shoot to both hands. that forms themselves into two of the gun above.

    Passive Shikai Ability:

    These pistols shoot black energy bullets from the right pistol and white from the left. They have no solid form they are pure energy. These guns are semi-automatic

    Shikai Abilities:

    8 Stars of the Dragon:

    From behind the middle of Eban's back a minature star appears upon activation that creates 7 more like itself. They are each around 4 inches in size. They all position themselves in a circle formation behind Eban. These stars with a burning and penetrating power are controlled by Eban at will. If destroyed Eban can regenerate them.

    Cosmic Destroyer

    Energy is concentrated to the front of the guns with the top of the barrels next to each other and each pointed towards the target with the bottom of the handle of each gun facing towards the outside. Eban then shoots off a large blast which is 5 foot in diameter and is swirled black and white.

  • Any Extra Notes: Derp...




Teitoku
Teitoku
Blackblood
Joined : 2011-02-25
Posts : 2112
Age : 28
Location : Nowhere

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Left_bar_bleue0/0Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty_bar_bleue  (0/0)
Tiers:

Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty Re: Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade

Sun Jan 19, 2014 1:32 am
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Tumblr_mz7swsdoxK1s56r3io1_500
Just a few things...
I don't have an issue with the upgrade as a whole, however I do feel that the powers need to be explained in a lot more detail. For example...

Passive Shikai Ability:

These pistols shoot black energy bullets from the right pistol and white from the left. They have no solid form they are pure energy. These guns are semi-automatic
How strong are these bullets? Are they like a normal gunshot? Are they capable of piercing through hierro simply? How fast do they travel? Are there any other effects that need to be taken into account? I feel like this could be explained much better as right now it gives a very minimal detail of what the bullets themselves can do. How much damage would one recieve from getting hit by one of these bullets?

From behind the middle of Eban's back a minature star appears upon activation that creates 7 more like itself. They are each around 4 inches in size. They all position themselves in a circle formation behind Eban. These stars with a burning and penetrating power are controlled by Eban at will. If destroyed Eban can regenerate them.
Same said as above, is there a limit to how much burning and penetration power can be put in it? How fast can Eban regenerate these stars? Is there a limit to how many times he can regenerate them? Just the small things that add detail and let the staff know what he is exactly capable of.

Cosmic Destroyer

Energy is concentrated to the front of the guns with the top of the barrels next to each other and each pointed towards the target with the bottom of the handle of each gun facing towards the outside. Eban then shoots off a large blast which is 5 foot in diameter and is swirled black and white.
Same deal as above, how strong? Fast? How much stronger is it when compared to the normal shots? How many times can he fire this shot? Explanations and more detail are definitely needed.





Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Ap8OoJO


Teijo
Teijo
Established Member
Joined : 2011-10-28
Posts : 338
Age : 31
Location : Who knows

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Left_bar_bleue5/100Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty_bar_bleue  (5/100)
Tiers:

Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty Re: Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade

Sun Jan 19, 2014 2:52 am
Passive Shikai Ability:

Eban's right pistol shoots black energy bullets and his left shoots white energy bullets. The energy ammo is shaped like a regular bullet and has the same effects of a regular bullet, but with an increased speed. The strength of the shot is directly tied to Eban's Kido skill. The damage caused by the bullets to a targets body in the penetrating aspect is the same as a regular bullet with an increased speed. The strength of these bullets are currently at a Hadō #4 strength. These guns do not need to be reloaded because the bullets are formed from energy inside the guns. These guns shoot semi-automatically.

8 Stars of the Dragon:

From behind the middle of Eban's back a minature star appears upon activation that creates 7 more like itself. They are each 4 inches in size. They all position themselves in a circle formation floating in mid-air behind Eban with the formation having a diameter of 5 feet. These stars unlike the bullets have a physical form, but like a star are brightly lit and filled with energy. Using this energy it has a burning attribute, and because it has a physical form it can clash with any kind of weapon or energy type attack or barrier. Compared to the bullets these are much stronger and more durable. The material they are made out of is extremely dense and are reinforced using the energy. At Eban's current level they can be Easily destroyed by a Master or Advanced level attack, mid difficulty for an adept level attack, and largely difficult for a beginner level attack. They are controlled by Eban at will. If destroyed Eban can regenerate them, but it takes two turns before they are regenerated. They move at 75% the speed of Eban's bullets. Alike to the bullets the strength of these stars are based on his Kido skill and are equivalent to Hadō 29 in strength.

Cosmic Destroyer

Energy is concentrated to the front of the guns with the top of the barrels next to each other and each pointed towards the target with the bottom of the handle of each gun facing towards the outside. This move takes 1 full turn in order to fully charge. Eban then shoots off a large blast which is 5 foot in diameter which is swirled with black and white which lasts a few moments long. This blast is the same speed as Eban's regular bullet, but equivalent to the strength of a Hadō 54. After this has been shot Eban cannot shoot another for 5 turns.

Derp... Oh yeah Maybe a tier upgrade in in order to achieve this as well... Derp... Yet again... Derp
Teitoku
Teitoku
Blackblood
Joined : 2011-02-25
Posts : 2112
Age : 28
Location : Nowhere

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Left_bar_bleue0/0Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty_bar_bleue  (0/0)
Tiers:

Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty Re: Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade

Mon Jan 20, 2014 7:25 am
Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Tumblr_mt4qvgSUF61rydwbvo1_500

Don't have an issue this time around. You're all good.




Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Ap8OoJO


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Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade Empty Re: Mid-Traning Life or death upgrade

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