Bleach Platinum Hearts RP
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.

Go down
Dexterity
Dexterity
Waifu War Veteran
Joined : 2012-11-04
Posts : 1177
Age : 31

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue248350/500000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (248350/500000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:36 pm
"I don't need an army. I don't need masses of cannon fodder. I don't, because my one soldier will be worth more than anything your entire army could ever stand up to." — Nozomi

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] RuumlstungStreiter2_zps5f783e96


Name: Rüstung Streiter

Age: Zero Years

Gender: Male

Numbers: Twenty-Six Strong [Ruling: Only a maximum of two of these NPC's can be present in a single topic at once, excepting Site Event topics/permission granted by all the people in the topic to use more]

Personality: The Rüstung Streiter have an unwavering ability to stay cool, calm, and collected. They are physically incapable of feeling rage, sadness, or other extreme emotions that a human being would, as such feelings were not granted to them. Rather, they were designed to have an extreme amount of control and precision in every action they take, unaffected by meager emotions. They keeps things at a professional level at all times, distant from casualness, lightness, and humor. Almost always the Rüstung Streiter will be straight-to-the-point; if one states that they are going to kill you, they intend to. When it comes to orders and decisions made by Nozomi, however, the Rüstung Streiter take them as unquestionable and immaculate, genuinely respecting them as such without anything inhibiting their thought process. They have a degree of introversion, given that they were meant to be used mostly in combat situations; an extrovert's personality would not be beneficial for the android. Finally, thanks to the immense amount of space contained within their mind, Nozomi was able to store masses of knowledge and intelligence within them to the same degree that was done with Hadelinde. For safety, most of the information was practical and on a need-to-know basis, to preserve Nozomi's own secrets and intel.

Appearance [See Image]
Each of the Rüstung Streiter are entirely identical in form, excluding the one detail that is their three-character identification code print in white on the right side of their neck. They are as they appear in the image at the top of this post, made of synthesized materials designed for specific reasons. Albeit the material does seem flexible, the metal that forms their body is extremely dense and difficult to penetrate. It has a humanoid form, appearing as though it is clad in iridescent black fabric from the toes to the tip of the head. The only opening to this strange synthetic armor is the bronze helmet it wears over its face, peaking down the middle and wide trapezoidal slits down either side of it, where the Rüstung Streiter look out, but those who look in can't see anything but hollow darkness. Other than that only rough tan gloves and bronze metal boots break up the solid black suit that is worn, and it gives them an unorthodox appearance. To remedy this, each wears an all-encompassing snow white cloak around their bodies that covers their entire body when buttoned at the top. It's pure black on the inside, which can be seen clearly from the large popped collar surrounding the back and sides of their neck. Overall, each Rüstung Streiter is seven feet tall exactly and weighs six-hundred and forty-nine pounds.

Within the suit is almost completely hollow, as if the Rüstung Streiter was but a suit of armor that one could fit in. However, within the top half of their helmet is the 'brain' of these entities that gives them their individuality. For those capable of detecting spiritual essence, the Rüstung Streiter can be seen to have an ethereal body filling in the armor. This body is humanoid in form, but is near completely nondescript. It seems to be made out of mysterious pure white spiritual particles; no descript face, no descript muscles, no descript organs... just reishi. They have a metallic masculine voice that clearly sounds muffled through the metal helmet of theirs; it exudes from their 'face' despite the lack of a mouth.


Tier: 0-2
Race: Android

Brief History: The history of the Rüstung Streiter can be summarized in their predecessor, Hadelinde. Not more than a couple months ago had the architect known as Nozomi begun construction on a project to create life from metal and energy. This experiment involved a imbuing a specifically-crafted suit of armor with an artificial soul. Nozomi had figured she already had the skill to perform such a feat, but through Hadelinde she desired a prototype of this craft so that the next wave of these entities could be perfected. After re-purposing Hadelinde into a personal body guard of sorts, she began construction on a line of armors differentiated only by a three-character identification tag on their neck. These suits of armor would be mostly hollow, seemingly lifeless, until Nozomi began the infusion of artificial souls. The second time around made the process much simpler and more stream-lined, giving the architect that capability to produce multiples at a time. Albeit no army could be created, she would complete a total of twenty-six infusions, forming an elite force that she dubbed Der Rüstung Streiter, or 'The Armored Champions'. In the coming months up until the present, Nozomi would begin manipulating the spiritual energies of these entities to be individual and independent from the Excore that had previously been used to power Hadelinde. To each their own supply of energy which recovered naturally over time and was quite above average when compared to pools of other spiritual beings. The Rüstung Streiter would make up a personal task force for Nozomi, capable of handling their own jobs without necessary intervention from their creator.

Associated Character: Nozomi.

Basic Powers:

Of Lightsteel: The Rüstung Streiter's form—which is much like a suit of armor—is made of a mystical alloy called 'Lightsteel', the cheaper substitute to Darksteel, both of which were created by Nozomi. Lightsteel is an advanced defensive material that varies in hardness and durability, which is reflected by a dull sheen. Normally the alloy itself is particularly dense, more difficult to penetrate than the thick titanium hull of a modern battleship. It sounds impressive, but really falls short of the job when it comes to facing the deadliest of foes, which is where it's abilities come in. The metal gets its name from the subtle shine it gives off when its barrier is up; an outer layer of energy that acts as a buffer to incredibly powerful attacks. Light strikes and basic blasts will merely bounce of harmlessly without touching the Lightsteel; the barrier will also thwart some high tier assaults with little effect. It takes an incredible attack to break past this barrier... But it only takes one seam to disable the entire field, rendering the Lightsteel dull. From there the Rüstung Streiter are considerably more vulnerable, and damage to the armor itself is a lot more permanent. Because, once the barrier of this armor is down for some time (One minute), it will recharge full-force. It should be noted that the Rüstung Streiter are not entities that can be destroyed by physical warfare, and requires their artificial soul to be directly targeted by an attack that specifically is meant to damage spirits. So overall, dealing any lasting damage to one of these warriors can take a while.

War Machine: This is the physical strength imbued into each of the Rüstung Streiter by Nozomi upon creation, defining them as brutal fighters. Their attacks come off as incredibly strong and extremely fast. Their enhanced speed will allow them to close gaps in the blink of an eye with speeds that require an advanced eye to even trace. The terrain they steps on will tear to pieces from the sheer kinetic force in their dashes, while such velocities will cause a gale of wind to trail them. Their enhanced strength will turn the world into their playbox, as they will be able obliterate peaks with their strikes, cause small quakes with their foot, and topple skyscrapers with a punch. In fact, the force of their attacks in this form can produce so much force that they can release shockwaves and effectively strike enemies without even touching them, with bone-shattering force as well. With this deadly power, the Rüstung Streiter are further dangerous due to the knowledge contained within their mind. They know vast amounts about thousands of different fighting styles across the world, and about the various weaknesses of certain races that Nozomi has collected through the ages.

Under The Cloak: While it may seem plain and dark beneath the sheer white cloak of Der Rüstung Streiter, there is actually quite a few surprises to be had. Their machine body is adjustable, capable of producing multiple limbs from their torso chassis. They can simply be more sets of arms that are complete copies of their originals, or they can be horribly disfigured limbs that serve other purposes. They can reach up ten meters away from theirselves, with dozens of three-hundred and sixty degree joints along the way. They can end with simple hands, or end in an assortment of tools from knives to keys to syringes. The only limit to the number of special limbs that can be made is by how many can fit on the torso, given that each on needs to connect to it. There are some specialized devices that can be produced from beneath Der Rüstung Streiter's cloaks; one of them is a hacking device that jacks into most electronics by force, and swiftly cracking whatever system runs it with the raw power of their mind. They also can produce a pseudo-Garganta spawning device similar to the one created by Urahara Kisuke, albeit minimized and much more efficient by Nozomi's design. They can also spawn Force Guns, which can create and manipulate force in a cone in front of them. as though they possessed an invisible massive hand.

Hirenkyaku: Hirenkyaku, otherwise known as God Step, is an advanced Quincy movement technique that allows the Rüstung Streiter to move at high speeds by riding on the flow of reishi created below their feet. Essentially, it is the Quincy equivalent to the Shinigami's Shunpo, or the Arrancar's Sonído. Through a swift process of gathering spiritual particles under her feet, they ride them to the desired location at speeds that cannot be tracked by a normal eye. Visualize a platform of Reishi stuck to the bottom of the Quincy's feet so that they may stand upon it. Then, instead of the Quincies themselves moving at increased speeds, the platform is the object moving, carrying them along with it. It can also be used to hover or fly for long distances, essentially allowing them a form of free flight. the Rüstung Streiter's own personal skill with this ability is quite impressive, along the lines of speed equivalent to Soifon and her Flash Step. What is more extraordinary is how effortless this movement is to them, as they are not limited by the confines of a true body. This type of movement is as effortless as walking to them.

Reishi Absorption and Control: One of the key abilities of any Quincy, and therefore one of the Rüstung Streiter's, it is the capability to masterfully manipulate vast amount of Reishi flowing throughout the atmosphere. Albeit they have their own source of spiritual energy within, the Rüstung Streiter can absorb Reishi from the environment and combine it with their own to create their Quincy Weaponry and perform their techniques. In addition it can also be used to steal away spiritual energy from their opponents, weakening them. This is generally done with intensive vibrations that soften foreign energies, and then stealing it away once the bonds are weakened.

Spiritual Awareness: As spiritual beings, the Rüstung Streiter can sense Hollows and other spiritual beings at a significant distance or tell in what direction they are in with a surprisingly natural proficiency. They have been formatted to be stunningly perceptive of even the subtlest of energies, despite the nature of their form. In addition to the basic sensory of Reiatsu, they can tell exactly where any trace amount of spiritual energy is residing without even looking in its direction if it is within the immediate area. Plus, they can track a person based on aged reishi that would be left behind by their mere presence. Every person has their own signature energy, and the Rüstung Streiter are capable of distinctively telling most apart, though they can be fulled my masterful subtlety. This ability is not nearly as foolproof as Nozomi's for the reason that they are not good at differentiating what is real and what is feigned. Despite the enhanced level of perception, this flaw is problematic to them.

Divine Shield: All good warriors come with a strong defensive ability, and the Rüstung Streiter are no different from that. Near perpetually surrounding any one of these war machines is the Divine Shield, an incredibly compact spherical layer of spiritual energy. It is only revealed to the naked eye when something strikes it, causing whatever section of the barrier that reacts to the attack to light up with a golden flare. Otherwise, the Divine Shield can only be seen by people who can detect spiritual energy. It is a translucent golden layer of light, dull in luster and color, but criss-crossed by much richer golden lines that circumscribe the sphere in random directions and angles. The barrier is but a fraction of a centimeter thick, and yet that is merely because the energy is compressed so tightly together that it appears thin. In actuality, the Divine Shield deceivingly... resolute. It can take a titanic array of attacks before it stresses out and breaks, reflecting the strength of Der Rüstung Streiter's tiers. Most attacks are blocked by this barrier at the cost of a little energy, but those that aren't likely woundn't affect them anyways, such as mental assaults. For as long as the Divine Shield remains up, no status effects can be placed upon them, as the shields only account for the raw power of an attack. For example, if a technique had very little force behind it but had a powerful wear and tear effect attached to it, that additional ability would go to waste here and only the force of the technique would count. Inversely, a strike that is only a strike and no more hits the Divine Shield with full force. Additionally, Der Rüstung Streiter are not effected by anything caused by the attacks for as long the shield remains in place, such as momentum. When the Divine Shield goes down, it can come back up, but it would require 3 posts of not being struck by a single attack, forcing opponents to keep the pressure up or risk bringing back such a powerful defense. Evaded attacks, glancing blows, and attacks blocked by other means do not count in this regard.

Quincy Arsenal: The Rüstung Streiter are different from normal Quincies in the fact that they utilize a small arsenal of weaponry rather than one central weapon. Each weapon expels the destructive Quincy energy in their own fashion, each fulfilling its own role in combat. Rüstung Streiter utilize this weaponry by gathering spirit energy and particles together into the form of their weapon of choice for the time being, and dispelling it when it is not necessary any longer. Because of the cloak that they wear, it appears as if the Rüstung Streiter are procuring them from a concealed area underneath the fabric, when in reality these weapons do not appear until they are formed. Rüstung Streiter have a total of four weapons they can summon:
  • Reihewaffe — This is the signature firearm of the Rüstung Streiter, otherwise called the Gatling Gun. It features eight massive barrels situated around one central cylinder (the gun rotor) and welded together by two rows of metal rings. These barrels extend from compact casing that holds the barrel assembly straight and allows the gun rotor to turn without too much recoil or wavering while firing. It also is where the user's arm is inserted to wield the massive weapon and form the projectiles that will be firing from the barrels. The entire gun is a shiny bronze color that is highly resistant to stains of any sort. It the sunlight it can easily be mistaken for being golden. When firing, the rotor spins at extreme speeds, firing a 'Holy Arrow' from the uppermost barrel each time one passes by. The weapon has five-thousand revolutions per minute, meaning that it fires approximately six-hundred and sixty-six 'Holy Arrows' every second that passes by, and the weapon does not seem to over heat in any way. However, the accuracy of the weapon is highly lackluster, managing to fly off course of where its aiming by ten degrees at the most extreme cases. Additionally, the projectiles fired by this weapon are small and not too powerful: They're like shards of light less than a foot long and only an inch thick, ten-thousand degrees farenheit in temperature. Alone they can cause a decent injury, but truly it is the rapid-fire of this weapon that makes it formidable. These 'Holy Arrows' cannot be redirected.

  • Heckenschütze — Although the Reihewaffe is a very formidable weapon in the Rüstung Streiter arsenal, it lacks the precision of the Heckenschütze, or the Sniper Rifle. This weapon features only one barrel, but it is much longer and thinner to allow a much more accurate shot. The weapon does not have a scope, but there is a lens over the barrel, which seems strange at first. This lens has two functions to the Rüstung Streiter, the first being the more important one; it provides another viewpoint from the standard eyes, allowing them to aim correctly even if firing from the hip. The second is to amplify the power of the bolt that flies through it like an acceleration gate, increasing the speed of flight and deadliness of the shot when it hits. The weapon handles unlike a human's sniper rifle, lacking that scope, lacking a cartridge system and oddly enough seeming like it was meant to be fired from the hip due to the awkward diagonal grip of the weapon. It is also coated in shiny bronze like Reihewaffe is, stainless and reflective. Also similarly the weapon collects reishi and energy where one would imagine the rounds would be loaded, and then fired. The weapon is semi-automatic, but is not very useful firing too fast due to the light of the projectile blinding the lens that is also used to aim. But rarely does more than one shot have to be fired from this weapon because usually the first will do its job well. As the 'Holy Arrow' flies down the barrel, a clockwise spin is put on the bolt and when it hits the lens it suddenly accelerates to Mach 5 in an instant, creating a rippling shockwave where it leaves the tip of the barrel and accentuating the area with a loud shriek (as opposed to the bang of a normal firearm). This bolt, which will hit its target far, far before they hear the gunshot, is two and a half feet long and two inches thick, heated up to fifteen million degrees Kelvin—almost the heat of the Sun's core—and will incinerate everything it passes through with ease. This weapon has an effective range of ten kilometers, and the 'Holy Arrow' cannot be redirected.

  • Zerstörer — The third firearm within the Rüstung Streiter arsenal, otherwise called the Destroyer, this cannon offers a much more explosive offense. When summoned, the Zerstörer is essentially a cannon, a hand-held miniature cannon that merely has one wide barrel that would indeed fit a rocket within. Also an iridescent bronze in color, the Zerstörer has a lipped barrel that is eight inches wide a little over three feet long. It is most comfortably held under the shoulder, and thus has a grip more towards the center of the weapon. Unlike the previous two weapons, there isn't much past the barrel itself (Think Bazooka), making an incredibly simplistic looking cannon. Spirit energy and particles are collected at the back, and fired out the front in a massive missile-shaped cylindrical projectile that is one foot long and six inches wide, releasing a trail of light as it flies through the air. This projectile is not nearly as fast as the bolts fired from the Heckenschütze or Reihewaffe, but unlike those two this projectile's trajectory can be manipulated at will by the Rüstung Streiter who fired it. When the projectile hits its target or is manually detonated by the Rüstung Streiter, it will create a super-heated blaze at the area that is one-hundred meters in radius. The inner ten foot radius of the blast will be super-heated to two-hundred thousand degrees farenheit for a full second, representing the obliteration zone, albeit small. Everything outside of that blast radius drops off radically though, only managing temperatures in the thousands of degrees farenheit at tops at the initial point of the explosion, before rapidly cooling as the plasma evaporates.

  • Lichtsäber — This is by far the oddest of the four Quincy weapons that the Rüstung Streiter can summon, as rather than a firearm, the Lichtsäber is a pseudo-melee weapon. When summoned, it appears as if only the handle is created, an eight inch bronze grip with an emitter on the top and a black cap on the bottom. To use, the Rüstung Streiter collects their spirit energy and particles into one within the grip, and then expels it through the emitter in the form of a blade of light. This blade is constant for as long as the user maintains it, with two-hundred thousand degrees of destructive energy contained within a straight line. This line can be extended up to one kilometer long almost instantaneously, but does not grow heavier or clunky to wield in the process. The weapon simply cuts, slicing most every object it comes into contact like a hot knife through butter, and setting it ablaze if its even remotely flammable.


Ahmt Alles: This is an odd thing indeed, but when it is said that Der Rüstung Streiter possess Nozomi's Copy Sword, it does not mean that literally. Instead, they possess copies of the Copy Sword, with the same abilities and same copied weapons. They work on a network of their own breed now, so whenever Nozomi gains a new variant for her own Ahmt Alles, then so too can Der Rüstung Streiter use it. This also works inversely, though they usually don't go out of their way to try and copy other people's weapons unless specifically ordered. Also, when they use their own copied versions, they can only use it up to their own tier, not Nozomi's. They share the same restriction as well, restricting their Quincy abilities: Regarding any weapon of tier 3 or below, they are not hindered in using it. However, tier 2 copied weapons require them to draw in twenty-five percent of their power to utilize, and tier 1 copied weapons require them to draw in fifty percent of their power to utilize—this means all her other abilities are weakened by that percentage in order to utilize the copied weapon's abilities. Lastly; Tier 0-5 and 0-4 weapons require seventy-five percent of their resources to be used up; Tier 0-3 weapons require ninety percent of their resources to be used up; and Tier 0-2 weapons completely lock down their capability to use her other Quincy abilities due to the resource draw. Any weapon more powerful than that simply cannot be properly mimicked and maintained. When regarding weapons with multiple states, the tier of the weapon is variable, only at its original tier when at its highest state. A sealed state that has no powers will of course not restrict any of their powers while using it. Any state with powers will count as one full main tier below the original. No powers are restricted while they are not using the copied weapon's abilities.


Last edited by Phantasia on Wed Jul 16, 2014 9:00 pm; edited 4 times in total


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Qx494h
Dexterity
Dexterity
Waifu War Veteran
Joined : 2012-11-04
Posts : 1177
Age : 31

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue248350/500000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (248350/500000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Sun Nov 10, 2013 4:10 pm
Just gonna bump this to let staff know it's ready to be checked. I just want a strike force for Nozomi since I am at that level to have minions, but I don't want a boring generic army.


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Qx494h
JJ
JJ
Rower of Rock. And Souls.
Joined : 2011-03-03
Posts : 5174
Age : 27
Location : , Location, Location!

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue20650/20000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (20650/20000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Sun Nov 10, 2013 9:50 pm
1. If they are going to be 0-5 tier, Nozomi can have up to two of them at any one time at most.
2. Having darksteel and extreme battle prowess is kind of... very difficult to deal with. Please either lower their defenses or very greatly reduce their speed, or make them only be able to function for 1-2 posts.
3. You should mention their level of ability to be manipulated by others, and whether or not their are organic or inorganic, to what level, and what can cause them to be manipulated on those levels.
4. I'd reccomend removing Reishi manipulation. If not, downgrading it significantly. Something that is nigh-impregnable combined with the ability to never run out of energy or stopped fighting is well... not very balanced for a tool.

Those are my biggest issues with them, after you make those changes they should be alright.




Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who has said it, not even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.
- Buddha
Dexterity
Dexterity
Waifu War Veteran
Joined : 2012-11-04
Posts : 1177
Age : 31

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue248350/500000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (248350/500000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Sun Nov 10, 2013 10:29 pm
Yay I got a response woot.

1) Yeah I talked to Ravana about this in passing. He suggested to never have more than like one out in a normal circumstance, unless said circumstance is like a big event where people bring their armies out. Additionally it could be a case-by-case basis where I ask permission from those I'm roleplaying with whether or not it's okay to use more. That sound good?

2) I will fix this. Though I was hoping to make these guys a miniboss challenge where you had to use a variety of attacks to break through the tough defenses... I can still part with that level of armor. I'll change it soon, renaming it to Lightsteel when it's done.

3) I don't quite understand this. These guys are individual spiritual entities, like ghosts that have possessed a suit of armor. Nozomi doesn't necessarily control them perse, more like they were 'programmed' to obey Nozomi. Dunno how exactly to respond to this.

4) This was just my attempt to put the Quincy reishi manipulation junk into my own words (Without ripping directly from the wiki). It's the basis of every Quincy's power ever, so this shouldn't be an issue.


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Qx494h
JJ
JJ
Rower of Rock. And Souls.
Joined : 2011-03-03
Posts : 5174
Age : 27
Location : , Location, Location!

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue20650/20000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (20650/20000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Wed Nov 13, 2013 10:21 pm
Approved.




Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who has said it, not even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.
- Buddha
Dexterity
Dexterity
Waifu War Veteran
Joined : 2012-11-04
Posts : 1177
Age : 31

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue248350/500000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (248350/500000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Wed Jul 16, 2014 9:01 pm


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Qx494h
Gamedragon
Gamedragon
Moderator
Joined : 2015-07-30
Posts : 524

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue0/0Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (0/0)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Thu Oct 27, 2016 4:17 pm
[mod]This character is being moved on over to inactive. The author of the character has not posted since the 30th of September, and by rules, the character must be moved and a notification must be left. I really hope that you're doing alright and okay, and we all hope that you can come back soon! To bring your character back, just leave staff a message here! https://www.platinumhearts.net/t9712-the-staff-request-thread-for-moves-archives-locking-or-whatever-else-you-need-staff-for[/mod]


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] QYEibkj
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] F2mrTYb
Henrex
Henrex
Tor'uk
Joined : 2016-01-20
Posts : 5123
Age : 24

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue419100/999999Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (419100/999999)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Sat Feb 10, 2018 6:16 pm

«- PREPARE TO BE REVIEWED -»


« Application Checklist »
  • Name [X]
  • Appropriate Age [X]
  • Gender [X]
  • Appearance Present [X]
  • Appearance Described in Appropriate Length OR Picture is Visible [X]
  • Appearance is Not Claimed [X]
  • 10 sentences for personality [X]
  • History is of appropriate length [X]
  • Powers are not Godmod/Overpowered [X]
  • Powers are described reasonably enough [X]
  • Application/RP Sample is not in First Person [X]
  • Skills are not filled in (Omit if a Hollow)[X]
  • RP Sample Present (Omit if this is not the first character) [X]
  • RP Sample is 10 sentences [X]


« The Willsheet Checklist »

• And Comments/Fixes •


  • Willpower/Determination: N/A
  • Mental Deduction: N/A
  • Pain Endurance: N/A
  • Focus: N/A


  • Comments/Notes: Everything's good here.
  • Tier: 0-2
Henrex
Henrex
Tor'uk
Joined : 2016-01-20
Posts : 5123
Age : 24

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue419100/999999Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (419100/999999)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Sun Feb 11, 2018 3:06 pm
[adm]Going to be reviewing this again, after finding issues with it from looking through it again and talking with Rawk about it.

Divine Shield

Going to briefly quote what Rawk said during our discussion on it.

"Making explicit reference to tiers like this when it isn't a mechanical thing is kind of...tacky, honestly.

"Objectively an absolute, this just makes them invincible to any long-term effects which is pretty broken."

"...not every character is "hit it very hard" and this has zero workarounds besides that. This ability is also on by default, rather than requiring activation, and I think all of that makes it still way too strong, even with the caveat of it only turning back on if they go 3 posts without being hit."

Reihewaffe

"Additionally, the projectiles fired by this weapon are small and not too powerful: They're like shards of light less than a foot long and only an inch thick, ten-thousand degrees Fahrenheit in temperature."

... "Not too powerful", yet this reaches 10,000 degrees? That's about the temperature of the Sun's surface. Tone this down heavily.

Heckenschütze

"This bolt, which will hit its target far, far before they hear the gunshot, is two and a half feet long and two inches thick, heated up to fifteen million degrees Kelvin—almost the heat of the Sun's core—and will incinerate everything it passes through with ease. This weapon has an effective range of ten kilometers, and the 'Holy Arrow' cannot be redirected."

Fifteen million degrees Kelvin? Incinerate everything it passes through with ease? Ten-kilometer range, and can't be redirected? No. No. No on every single account.

Lichtsäber

"This line can be extended up to one kilometer long almost instantaneously, but does not grow heavier or clunky to wield in the process."

I...can't even comprehend the amount of destruction a kilometer long lightsaber could cause. A kilometer. That's almost half the size of the real world Golden Gate Bridge in California. This is just a piece of equipment. Lower this immensely, and add in a weight and disbalance effect -- something that was stated that wouldn't happen in the last bit of that sentence.

Ahmt Alles

To quote Rawk once again...

"This is already incredibly absurd on Nozomi, and will most likely be looked over and rechecked, but these NPCs definitely should not have something of this caliber at all."

[/adm]
Dexterity
Dexterity
Waifu War Veteran
Joined : 2012-11-04
Posts : 1177
Age : 31

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Left_bar_bleue248350/500000Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (248350/500000)
Tiers:

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Mon Feb 12, 2018 2:27 am
Making explicit reference to tiers like this when it isn't a mechanical thing is kind of...tacky, honestly.
Well all it means is that they can make a barrier as strong as their tier would allow them to. It's the easiest way to explain it without trying to get into details.

"Objectively an absolute, this just makes them invincible to any long-term effects which is pretty broken."
What do you mean?

"...not every character is "hit it very hard" and this has zero workarounds besides that. This ability is also on by default, rather than requiring activation, and I think all of that makes it still way too strong, even with the caveat of it only turning back on if they go 3 posts without being hit."
Well it was always meant to be more effective against the non-physical types. I could fix it although turning it into a plain shield. Also the activation requirement is no big deal.

---

10,000 degrees
A lit candle is somewhat over 1000 degrees Kelvin. How much do you propose I lower this and still be effective in the 0 tier range?

---

Fifteen million degrees Kelvin? Incinerate everything it passes through with ease? Ten-kilometer range, and can't be redirected? No. No. No on every single account.
Lowering the temperature to 1 million sound fine?

"Incinerate everything it passes through with ease" was more to make the ability sound intimidating, I'll remove it.

Humans are already firing sniper rounds in the kilometers so how much do you propose I lower this?

'Can't be redirected' is a drawback. It is there to ensure that the NPC can't control the trajectory of their Holy Arrow as Quincies can do, just as it says in the previous ability.

---

I...can't even comprehend the amount of destruction a kilometer long lightsaber could cause. A kilometer. That's almost half the size of the real world Golden Gate Bridge in California. This is just a piece of equipment. Lower this immensely, and add in a weight and disbalance effect -- something that was stated that wouldn't happen in the last bit of that sentence.
What range do you propose? Also light is weightless; if there is a drawback then it should be something else entirely.

---

Ahmt Alles
I will remove this, more because as the years go by the less I like this weapon.


Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Qx494h
Sponsored content

Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2] Empty Re: Der Rüstung Streiter [APPROVED, 0-2]

Back to top
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum