Departing again.

Well I done told some of you so this should not be any surprise at all, But I am leaving again. I myself have been having trouble with things irl as some of you know and it is not helping my mind set at all. I just can't take coming on here anymore. I know that sounds so bad but its how I feel right now. No one did anything really that bad or anything to me. It was all a lot of things that should have been small.

Some don’t like how actively I apply my people to things. Even though I try my hardest to keep up with all of it and each role's duties. Then there is the belittling. Some talk down about my characters skills as if they mean nothing at all. On the other end there are people that don’t like my abilities ether. Mainly because they don't like the idea of them alone. Rather it’s because I did not follow the “normal way” of doing it or I managed to make something they seen as impossible possible. Then there is the nothing. Thats all I can call it as sometimes it seems like people think of me as nothing. Commonly skipped over in things without a word and Left out as if I was not there.

I don't like following someone's else's footsteps. Nor am I so narrow minded to think there is only one way to do things “AKA the normal way”. No I like to think that there is many numbers of ways to do things and it’s your job to find you’er own… not just follow what someone else did and just do that. I also don’t like to think of anything as “impossible”. No I don’t think things are nice and easy. You got to put time and work in to them.

For example my Isae. She is by far from what I can tell a hated person. I’ve gotten so many pc about her from people saying everything from “you should not be allowed to do that.” To “ I am going to kill her” and that is putting it nicely. They did not care about what I did to make her possible or anything. Took me probably more than 5 months IRL to make her. I did quest and things so I could get yen to buy items. I made her sword and body IN threads not just said I made it. all this using things a gathered fairly and paid for. Than her checking. I made it a point to ask frost himself check her for me. This was because I wanted the heist authority on the site to approve what I done. After all my prep work was done and I had the yen to buy what I neede. I started making her app. the app was done on Mon Dec 03, 2012 1:22 am. But was not approved tell Sun Mar 17, 2013 9:57 pm. Over 3 months I was in waiting. But I was happy to do this as frost is a really busy guy. I know it could take quite some time for it and of course I tried not to bug him about it. In no way was I upset at the time I put in or had to wait for her to be done. To me it was all part of the process of makeing her. it was part of the work needed and sometimes to get what you want you have to be patient. So I was happy to do all of this.

But then after all that others started in. she was approved and they did not like it. lots of negative pc from lots of people. But too you zx or Kakeru. I like you to know this does not apply to your pc’s. You talked to me and ask about things. You tried to see and understand things not just say “no your stupide for trying” right off the bat and I am so thank full to you for that. I know you don’t really approve of isae but at least you asked about things. You and I were talking a little about some changes you would like and we still have not finished them I don’t think. . you seen that I had made it next to impossible to tell who and what she was. I must say when you ask me to make a post limit of how long she could use the very thing that made her a Shinigami. I was happy and proud of myself. I almost cried I was so happy.

Of course I refused to do it as that would just be a death sentence for her. She lives in the ss after all and no matter how high the post limit was all those that wanted to kill her could just drew out any thread and expose her.

She is one example, there are a lot more things that have happened. Like being nominated for an otm and then not being added to the voting poll. Applying for orgs and being passed over by someone checking it without a word so no one even looks at mine. Getting approval for a spot in a org, but then never added to the list. Being talked down to about my characters. Being told that I don’t really need to make the reserve for a spot for an ORG and to just say what I making it for on the app. Than having my intentions for that app disregarded. Being told that I will have my org spots ripped away for me just if someone else asks for it. … There is a lot more but I am going to end it.

But all of that is not the real problem, I should be able to take all that and just deal with it. The problem is me and I know that. Because of how I feel right now I can't handle any negativity, not even the small things. Even if I know it was a mistake or someone did not really mean it to be hurtful as a lot of them are. or the things that are meant to be. I can’t stop myself from dwelling on them. I truly think I should have not come back so soon and I am going to leave now be four I start getting mad at people for no real reason. I think I will come back to bhp after I am ok again but I don’t know when.


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To help out a little the only org I am in right now is KHS and its student council list that suzu will need to be removed from.

Though I applied Isae to the Shino Academy headmaster and got approved it was changed from the old hade master to open instead of adding me. So will not need to be removed from the Gotei 13.

she never got to rejoin SF ether.

There is also the FC’s that will need removed.

Archiving should be easy ^,^ not done a whole lot.
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to the threads i am in. jj agreed to finish out ss thread for me . gold and black.

Shizuo you can let suzu walk away like i tryed. or you can do something els and make the thread go dead tell i get back. I tryed whiting to see your next post ... and tho you said it be soon, its still not done. so the ball is in your court now as iv lost all well to stay any longer.

to tina and dan I think it be beast to treat "feeding the ice" as a done thread and everyone left. that way you both can clam it next time you try for a up grade. that is batter than letting it die and getting nothing for what you did.

the sueki thread is kinda dead 0-0 soo i really have nothing to say about that . could always just use her as a npc/sex-puppet in the thread.

( ps will probly look and see if i win the lottery. after its done... and lio don't for get are bet. even if i am not here who is to say i cant take all your yen. XD)

like always with a open heart and an empty head your friend, zetsurin.

I am sorry to hear that. I wish you would come back soon. We'll be here for you well I know a good group of people that will be here.

I truly wish I had seen some of this cowardly bullying. I could have done something to stop it. Nobody should have to feel like they don't belong here. Nobody. I wish you only the best, Zets, and hope that someday you'll come back to Platinum Hearts and will be welcomed back with open arms and hearts. Until that day comes, have a great life Zetsurin.