I Fucked Up [Adam Pre-War Thread] [Brazil] [Semi-Open]
Tue Feb 19, 2019 5:08 am
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMBisq2b3yQ
Artist: Red House Painters - Song: Lord Kill The Pain - Word Count: N/A
Waves of silence echoed across a coal drenched piece of land where the vast nation of Brazil once resided. In this blackened earth stood a man staring aimlessly into the sea as the shimmering heat of the Brazilian sun blared down upon his pale skin. Yet, the warmth of this solar glow had not existed in the perception of this single human man. It was almost as if he didn't exist at this moment, and why should he? All of his plans went to shit.
The proudest sentiment of the Monsuta's established power was rendered nothing more than a memory. Centuries of growth as being one of the most feared factions of earth had led to this testament of their terroristic strength ending up purged into fine oblivion by the final damning blow of Azuma. Hundreds of millions of humans were skewered ON HIS WATCH, HIS FUCKING WATCH, because of the actions of a single spoiled child who couldn't take failure and decided to act like a petulant brat and burn all the pieces on the chess board until they didn't exist anymore.
THE MAD MAN FUCKING BLEW IT ALL TO HELL!
What kind of FUCKING legacy is that? The greatest fucking threat to the Earth gone because of a fucker who couldn't keep his cool long enough to see his sorry ass people be led to victory. As in the shadows of their defeat, Adam had spent years building up morale among Monsuta operatives, investing in their technology, changing their structure and killing so many god damn lives to see their vision and his align.
So WHAT was the point of all this? Just to suffer again and find another failure in a long lifeline of defeats?! Was he even fucking right to kill his parents and leave that safe prison they made for him? What was the god damn point of having his body skewered, butchered, thrown a part and scarred if it was to fail again and again for centuries on end without even having a glimpse of ability to be able to lead the human towards something better!? WHAT FUCKING RIGHT DID HE TO CALL HIMSELF SOMEONE EVOLUTIONARY IF HE COULDN'T EVEN WIN ONE MEASELY FUCKING OF HOPE WITHIN THIS ORGANIZATION!?
FUCK!
It all was so MADDENING that he couldn't help but begin wailing and breaking down in tears at this own incompetencies, weaknesses, helpless and total lack of power to stop the ambitions, wills, and strength of others from imposing his own hearts inner desires and dreams. With the man, no, boy now falling to his knees, he felt so childish smashing his fist into the earth again, again and again, because as he bled the crimson fluid of blood, the pain which radiated from his right hand reminded him of how much he failed to achieve in his godforsaken life.
MOTHER FUCK!
Maybe he was still just a child if he was throwing just as much of a temper tantrum, but fuck it, did it even matter at this point if he was unable to achieve a god damn thing?! Not even a single articulate thought could enter his mind as his whole body was trembling with pain, heartache, regret, and remorse for everything he did. Was all of this worth it? Were all the lives he slain equating to jackshit of an evolution for humanity?! THOSE FUCKING BASTARDS IN THE LUX ORIOR AND VASTIME WERE EVEN MAKING BIGGER GAINS THAN HIM!
SHIT! FUCK THIS, FUCK THIS, FUCK THIS!
FUCK EVERYTHING! IT WAS ALL SO FUCKING SHIT!
So -- all he could do was let out a bloody scream from the depths of his heart as auras of scarlet red and cherry pink essence bled out of his body. He couldn't even fucking feel Eve's love trying to protect his psyche from the reality of his actions anymore, so all he was left with was grief, anger, hurt and so much heartache that it felt as if his heart was gonna rip in fucking two at this point. So he continued to scream and punch the ground; even as the raw bone of his knuckles started to show.
Where the FUCK could he move from this point? Why does he CONSTANTLY have to restart everything from scratch!? What the FUCK can he do as a criminal of the world after having made his stand? Fight a pointless battle? Go into hiding? Fuck, even if he was afraid, the better part of his spite would see to he'd fight until his last living breath. But even if he was wiling to die: what the fuck of his god damn daughter, Jenny? What kind of life could see live having served under such a worthless fucking father?! She was in danger and what the FUCK could he do as a man to protect her?
FUCK!
More anger, helplessness, and utter sorrow swirled in his mind as his eyes were blinded in blood and tears as the reality of his life soaked deeper into his consciousness. What FUCKING right did he even have to claim to consider himself smart, strong and someone capable of pioneering humanity at this point? Even his godforsaken faction was running low on members. Yeah, the bastard had enough resources to smoke other organizations, but the overall fucking objective of actually making an impact on humanity was SHIT. ABSOLUTE SHIT! There had been bastards with 10% of his life that have achieved more than him at this point.
FUCKING SHIT! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
....
Yet above it all, he was still so fucking alone. It was so fucking perfect, right? He hadn't grown, he hadn't changed. He only grew into a bigger fucking child over the years as he continued to seek for a comfort he could never find from his parents. That love, that protection and that feeling of purpose in life could never be his at this rate and how long he's lived. All that was left for him was suffering, misery, isolation, failure, contempt, and rejection in this world. Fuck, maybe he was right to just die with his fucking parents instead of struggle and try against his own ego to prove his genetics were worthy of evolving humanity. Maybe it was all just grandiose bullshit to help him cope with how broken of a person he was at the end of the time.
Someone.....please just kill this pain.
It was all too much to digest for him when those hellish cries left his lungs too tired to exert such grief. So, he simply curled up in a ball of his blood and tears; clinging his knees to his chest as he wondered what the fuck he could to tear this shit show of a life around and find his next way up in the world.....
"Fuck......I'm pathetic."
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Re: I Fucked Up [Adam Pre-War Thread] [Brazil] [Semi-Open]
Tue Feb 19, 2019 5:33 am
ENTER THE DEPTHS
Artist: N/A - Song: N/A - Word Count: N/A
Following the destruction of the Monsuta there was every reason that the Lux Orior and Yuudeshi would have reason to keep a tab on this place. As broken and damn near destroyed it was, basically unusable there was always the potential and looming threat of there still being remains and fragments of this chaotic group around. As unlikely as it was why risk it? That was the exact reason why Chifuyu became aware of the presence of a familiar character within the domain. An acquaintance that she met after the events of Monsuta's invasion into Vastime which was eventually pushed back.
It was with haste that she would transport herself to the broken place, walking across the water inside the crater with her control over the environment from her anima stone and it's connection to the Earth. Regardless Chifuyu didn't run or really increase the pace, she used her movement technique to trace a line towards Adam that shortened the distance it took to walk to him but he would likely become aware of her presence before she had made it. It wasn't like she was hiding it anyway.
When she had made it to her destination she stood behind Adam who had seemed to finish and reach the stage of curling up into a ball, she decided to sit crouch down and hover above him from her new position having already figured out what was wrong, it didn't take a genius to know that one.
He's hurting. You should help him. He helped you.
Of course sympathising with someone was never her strong suit nor was comforting them with words. She was very blunt when someone appealed to her like that. So instead of letting her probably poorly articulated words do the work she put her hand on his head and began to stroke his head to try and calm him down to a better or at least a mindset more in-tune with what she could communicate with and not mess it up.
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Re: I Fucked Up [Adam Pre-War Thread] [Brazil] [Semi-Open]
Tue Feb 19, 2019 2:26 pm
ENTER THE PRINCESS OF FEAR
Artist: Nour Khan - Song: Unravel
It was gone.
Everything her wonderful father had built up and the place that she viewed as a safe haven for herself, disappeared. All the girl could do at this point was fall to her knees, staring at the empty space that now was Brazil -- the place that hosted so many people, a large, proud organization with her and her father as members. She had been born and molded in the labs of the Monsuta, and now...it was all gone. Tears began to well up in her eyes as Jenny's head lowered.
Rising to her feet and forcing her body to move forward as she sniffled and stifled her sobs, Jenny collapsed next to her father, wiping her eyes and staining her sleeves with her tears.
"Azuma, you brain-dead IDIOT!"
All of that progress, everything that her father had done, something she had found herself attached to very quickly -- all of it, erased. Once again, they had to start from god damn scratch again. Thus, through this sentimental attachment, it wasn't hard for Jenny to also feel very emotional at this. To which, she also found herself breaking down, her cries seeming to reach Heaven itself as she wrapped her arms around Adam.
"Daddy..."
Sniffling again, Jenny tightened her embrace, seeking the warmth of her father in this time of pain and suffering, even if he too shared in this sorrow, she didn't care. She simply had the desire to be held and loved in an attempt to mend and heal them from this immense sadness and anger. The words kept repeating in her mind, over and over again, like a mantra as she buried herself in Adam's arms.
'It's game over...everything's ruined.'
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