Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
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- lionusModerator
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Thu Oct 23, 2014 9:11 pm
![Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++) Tumblr_m7l6yzBUoI1r4hwmoo1_500](https://2img.net/h/24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7l6yzBUoI1r4hwmoo1_500.gif)
This ones been sitting round for over 2 weeks so off to old WIP you shalt go. You can still make your edits and all and when ya finish just post HERE and well get someone to look over it
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Sat Jan 10, 2015 11:35 pm
To preface this I grade abilties using our "Golden Rules."
1.) Are there limitations to the ability?
2.) If you had to fight against this, would you enjoy yourself?
Is there a limit to this? Are the crystals especially resistant to being punched or something? Is there an effective field of effect for the crystals to be placed? Is she limited to 20 at release or can she add more? There's not specifically wrong with this ability, but these are details that should probably be added, especially given the nature of this app.
Give me a "How" for the way this works. I understand that probability is altered dependent on proximity to her crystals and a compare and contrast of the combatants willpowers, but how does that actually manifest? How is she more likely to hit someone? If she throws a punch that only has a chance of hitting if the other person suddenly trips over his own, are they now all but guaranteed to trip into her fist? If she has no feasible way of avoiding someone kicking her in the face, are they suddenly forced to sneeze and mess up their attack? This is a novel idea, but I don't know how you'd execute this without godmodding the other person which is an issue. 50 feet away from indiscriminate placement of her crystals is kind of a flimsy limitation as well, considering there doesn't seem to be a limit as to how many times she can do this.
See above, you give more practical examples here(though I have no idea what surviving at low health means, do the crystals have diminished functions after using this ability to survive or do they just not look as pretty?) but if it's impossible for her to avoid getting punched in the face, how is it suddenly made possible? I'd like a more concrete example of a combat application of this.
One of the bolded needs to be changed or removed altogether. Ignoring that seeing the word "Automatic" on anything makes me want to deny it, repeatedly just to nail the point home, it definitely can't "Automatically" connect AND THEN paralyze them for any time at all, much less an unspecified time. There's no counter play to the paralyzing aspect of this ability whatsoever and it's remarkably easy for one of Norah's allies to just stab the person locked in this battle to death while they can't move. Even if she's alone, it's ridiculous. She fires a Cero, then HA CHALLENGED and they're forced to take that sparkly new hole in the chest because this has no counter play at all to it. So yeah, I like the idea of her exerting her willpower on people and forcing a test of wills. I hate that they can do nothing to avoid it and they definitely cannot be paralyzed by it if they can't avoid it.
This is a Shikai ability...that can theoretically conjure a 0-1...no...this is going to be outright denied.
Asking for diminished stats means an amazingly little amount when you can tie a potentially fatal "string" to someone just by looking at them. You're asking for enhanced will power at the expense of parameters and then adding abilities which deliberately circumvent her weakness. This needs to have some kind of counter play, and not one that is virtually impossible for someone else to exploit.
Again...she can't be auto-killing anyone with a weaker Willpower than her...how does this break their mind? By being in proximity to them when their willpower is lower than Norah's? This isn't fun to play against, at all. Denied unless this is heavily reworked.
So, of the characters on this site who can out right negate and block off other peoples' powers which is what I think you're trying to do here, correct me if i'm wrong, one has no other powers and requires physical contact to the object in question to neutralize it. One has nothing else and literally has nothing else. And the other requires touch and has a limited amount of time where he can keep powers neutralized...this ability is a wide field, can friend of foe differentiate, is an add on power to EVERYTHING else Norah can do, and then blocks any outside influences, cannot be fought off in any way, etc. Denied.
...No. I shouldn't have to explain why this is a blatant no, I'm confused you thought that this was a good idea.
So another ability they can't in any way avoid that allows Norah to modify the laws of nature at her whim with little to no restriction while also being able to render the opponent's weapons useless at, again, her whim. Come on dude...
Last time someone tried to "save" other people's abilities to a hard drive was Aivee, it wasn't cool then it's not cool now, especially since her entire character involved this, not one ability amidst a sea of others. No.
Oh she's immortal too? 3 days as well? Can we drop pretense and just point out that you want to make Jesus? 3 Days is not a suitable reconstruction time for what is effectively immortality. Other comparable abilities either involve the person reverting to a weaker state of being and needing to re-earn what they formerly were or, in some cases, growing up all over again. This needs to be changed.
1.) Are there limitations to the ability?
2.) If you had to fight against this, would you enjoy yourself?
Shikai Description: From the waters below Norah, she will pull up a very long digital appearing blade from the source. It will have extremely sharp edges and appear like a whip of sorts, allowing Norah to whip it around, or even use it as an extended blade. The max distance the blade can reach is up to 20 feet in distance. She will have no change in her appearance, but Norah will gain 20 blue Crystals to hover in the air where Norah wishes them to be placed. They are the catalyst for some of Norah's abilities and thus she'll place them where needed for her powers to get the most affect.
Is there a limit to this? Are the crystals especially resistant to being punched or something? Is there an effective field of effect for the crystals to be placed? Is she limited to 20 at release or can she add more? There's not specifically wrong with this ability, but these are details that should probably be added, especially given the nature of this app.
Probability Control:
Reverse probability within an area of effect of crystals that hover around Norah. When within 50 feet of Norah's crystals, probability reverses, making reality modifiable for probability under Norah's willpower. For example, if its improbable that Norah ever land a hit against an opponent, it is reversed, and very probable that Norah will land a hit.
Give me a "How" for the way this works. I understand that probability is altered dependent on proximity to her crystals and a compare and contrast of the combatants willpowers, but how does that actually manifest? How is she more likely to hit someone? If she throws a punch that only has a chance of hitting if the other person suddenly trips over his own, are they now all but guaranteed to trip into her fist? If she has no feasible way of avoiding someone kicking her in the face, are they suddenly forced to sneeze and mess up their attack? This is a novel idea, but I don't know how you'd execute this without godmodding the other person which is an issue. 50 feet away from indiscriminate placement of her crystals is kind of a flimsy limitation as well, considering there doesn't seem to be a limit as to how many times she can do this.
Possibility Contradiction:
If anything is impossible, Norah makes it possible within 10 feet of her hovering crystals. If it is impossible that her Crystals ever not survive a blast for example, the crystals will survive instead, but at low health. This doesn't make things immortal in any way, just reverses the chances of occurrences in reality. This can apply to nearly anything that remains possible or impossible in reality. Norah being unable to jump 30 feet for example, if a crystal is by her, she can adjust that to become possible, as well as probable and she'll jump the 30 feet. Norah cannot make definitions from Possibility Contradiction, as this only reverses/adjusts what is possible and impossible. She cannot put definition into this ability like saying that it be impossible her crystals EVER be destroyed, but that it be impossible for a moment.
See above, you give more practical examples here(though I have no idea what surviving at low health means, do the crystals have diminished functions after using this ability to survive or do they just not look as pretty?) but if it's impossible for her to avoid getting punched in the face, how is it suddenly made possible? I'd like a more concrete example of a combat application of this.
Battle of Wills:
Battle of Wills is where Norah will create a link between her target and herself and initiate a battle of wills. If Norah feels her will is stronger, she will challenge and a mental link will automatically connect her and her opponent. From there, the two minds will be judged and neither Norah or her target can move till the battle is over. The two will enter a trial where they will be put under intense stress till one mind yields. If Norah wins, her opponent will gain a headache and have been slightly sapped. If Norah loses, she'll start with the Headache and will have to fight slightly handicapped, even though she can just sap the headache to her opponent if she has the chance. This is how Norah tends to start her battles, as a way to judge the will of her opponent and gauge how difficult things will be for her.
One of the bolded needs to be changed or removed altogether. Ignoring that seeing the word "Automatic" on anything makes me want to deny it, repeatedly just to nail the point home, it definitely can't "Automatically" connect AND THEN paralyze them for any time at all, much less an unspecified time. There's no counter play to the paralyzing aspect of this ability whatsoever and it's remarkably easy for one of Norah's allies to just stab the person locked in this battle to death while they can't move. Even if she's alone, it's ridiculous. She fires a Cero, then HA CHALLENGED and they're forced to take that sparkly new hole in the chest because this has no counter play at all to it. So yeah, I like the idea of her exerting her willpower on people and forcing a test of wills. I hate that they can do nothing to avoid it and they definitely cannot be paralyzed by it if they can't avoid it.
Projection of Reality:
Norah's crystals will create an invisible stage, and when made, Norah will make a projection of her targets willpower, based from the information of the mind stolen from her target. These targets will match the opponents tier, and will have a mindset of the target and their true intentions and identities, or will project what Norah wants them to project. They are meant to be mirror matches, and for the projection to break their target down through their mind while Norah fights them physically for sneak attacks. The Projection must stay within range of about 500 feet from any of Norah's Crystals to stay projected, for if it leaves it's zone, the projection will disappear and Norah will have to re-create it.
This is a Shikai ability...that can theoretically conjure a 0-1...no...this is going to be outright denied.
Connection of red string - Fate:
When Norah feels that she is going to lose and is beyond her control, she'll suddenly activate the Red String of Fate. When done so, a red string will appear between her and her opponent. The string is invisible to the opponent, and can only be contacted/seen when the target has a higher willpower than Norah. The string will appear instantly and make contact as soon as Norah's eyes spot the target, so once seen, you're instantly under its influence. When the string is active, a connection is made between her opponent and herself, so that whatever damage is done to Norah is done back to her opponent. If Norah is cut, her opponent will be cut, and so forth. If Norah dies, so will her opponent. The only way to see the string is to overpower Norah's willpower. Once done, the string can be cut, but her opponent must first overpower Norah's willpower to see the string.
Asking for diminished stats means an amazingly little amount when you can tie a potentially fatal "string" to someone just by looking at them. You're asking for enhanced will power at the expense of parameters and then adding abilities which deliberately circumvent her weakness. This needs to have some kind of counter play, and not one that is virtually impossible for someone else to exploit.
Mind Break:
Mind Break can only be used when either Norah has a higher willpower than her opponent/target, or when her opponent is damaged heavily from her Mind Sap (Headache/migraine or lack of will). What will happen is Norah's blade will glow and she will attempt to break her targets mind. When the mind is broken, everything goes blank and the target's conscious breaks. While the target will live, their mind will black out and their memories, thoughts, and intelligence will break forcing them to either re-learn everything again, or become a vegetable. Once Norah lands her Mind Break, she then is capable of simply sticking her blade into a vital area of her opponent, claiming victory.
Again...she can't be auto-killing anyone with a weaker Willpower than her...how does this break their mind? By being in proximity to them when their willpower is lower than Norah's? This isn't fun to play against, at all. Denied unless this is heavily reworked.
Digital Data Corruption:
Digital Data Corruption is a giant area of effect that takes place around 1/2 mile from Norah's crystals, creating a battlefield. The Crystals create the outline of the battlefield, and prevent any outside influences affecting the battlefield with possibility and probability control. What Digital Data Corruption does is creates a digital battlefield that stops and negates, and contains all forms of data, process, thought, and creation to it's source location. Best way to think of this is, is your Zanpaktou creates something, then the Zanpaktou needs to make it, not the wielder, thus the Zanpaktou needs to create the power or force while the Wielder has no control over it, instead he only is capable of controlling his own strengths. This battlefield has different effects on allies, enemies, and Norah herself. The zone of course has a "Firewall" that Norah is able to label as Good and Bad within her Zone. This allows Allies to use their powers openly through Norah, and blocks out Enemies. The Firewall also has thousands of different Proxy's as if people try to use different codes or makeups to get through her Zone, Norah will read it instantly and have it blocked. Only way to escape it, is by running...
So, of the characters on this site who can out right negate and block off other peoples' powers which is what I think you're trying to do here, correct me if i'm wrong, one has no other powers and requires physical contact to the object in question to neutralize it. One has nothing else and literally has nothing else. And the other requires touch and has a limited amount of time where he can keep powers neutralized...this ability is a wide field, can friend of foe differentiate, is an add on power to EVERYTHING else Norah can do, and then blocks any outside influences, cannot be fought off in any way, etc. Denied.
Murphy's Law:
If anything is possible to happen, it can, and will. When Norah enters Bankai, she will not only be in the Zone, she will also have her Crystals activate something called Murphy's Law. From Murphy's Law, Norah will make 3 rules in which labels what is possible and what is not while within her Digital Field. They can either be what is entirely possible, or impossible, and she will modify it. This is like her Possibility and Probability control, but this time, she indefinitely sets what is possible and what is improbable to 3 rules when activated. When activate, they will happen, and nothing will stop. Examples of these rules can be things that "Happen" but nothing that labels an end result. So while Norah can set a Law to every attack she lands, it doesn't judge how many till she defeats her opponents. She can however also set a rule that she is capable of dodging all her opponents attacks, but that will only work on one target, as to label all targets would label it an impossible feat. If she was to however state she is capable of dodging all enemy abilities, it would also affect the opponent in the sense that if they were to begin an attack that cannot be missed, an improbable force will cause a mistake, like a rock or burst of wind will come from nowhere and cause Norah to move, or the opponent to miss. Be warned that this can only happen in range of Norah's Crystals and cannot happen outside of the Digital Data Corruption Zone.
...No. I shouldn't have to explain why this is a blatant no, I'm confused you thought that this was a good idea.
Digital Breakdown:
Norah is capable of breaking herself down within the Digital Data Corruption and altering her positions. Due to this, Norah's speed isn't what improves, but instead she gains a form of instant teleportation and body modification. Norah is capable of breaking herself down, or her body parts in which allows her to edit herself within her Zone and her location. Norah can have one of her arms disappear and reappear elsewhere, or her entire body for that matter. While within the Digital Data Corruption Zone, Norah can also edit the battlefield and all natural landmarks within it. She can edit the landscapes and entire make up code of whatever is captured within her Zone that is not a living and breathing animate object. An example are rocks, trees, buildings, landmarks, climate control, gravity, ect. She cannot edit the make up of her opponents or their weapons. What she can edit is their shape, size, color, and breakdowns, using it to her advantage within the zone. She can also disrupt the natural space within the zone, not allowing for portals to be made and locking the dimensions within the Zone.
So another ability they can't in any way avoid that allows Norah to modify the laws of nature at her whim with little to no restriction while also being able to render the opponent's weapons useless at, again, her whim. Come on dude...
Digital Copy:
Norah is able to recreate anything (With limitation) within the Digital Data Corruption Zone, even herself. She can recreate herself with the exact digital make up and abilities to fight within the Zone, as well as if she wanted, create additional projections of her opponent in which to fight against. Norah can copy abilities within the Zone once she attains their digital make up, so in which to do so, Norah will need to see the ability in which to use it. Norah can Copy, Cut, and Paste abilities after she witnesses them, and safe them to her "Hard Drive". When stored in the "Hard Drive" Norah will have later access to said abilities in which to use and abuse for her needs while within the Digital Data Corruption Zone. One thing to note however is the "Hard Drive" space of Norah's Zone. The space is limited by the Crystals as each Crystal will be able to copy and store one ability each, and Norah and Nanashi combined can store up to 10 due to their combined willpower and focus.
Last time someone tried to "save" other people's abilities to a hard drive was Aivee, it wasn't cool then it's not cool now, especially since her entire character involved this, not one ability amidst a sea of others. No.
Back Up:
When Norah enters Bankai, her blade automatically makes a backup of Norah, so that if she is mortally wounded or killed, the blade will keep the Digital makeup of Norah in its files, so when the battle is over and Norah is gravely injured, or mortally wounded, or even dead, the Blade will dissipate and return to a restore point that Norah will have established before hand (Most likely the Monsuta Barracks), and will restore herself there. It takes 3 days to complete, but when done, Norah will return to normal from the data stored in her blade, and with data to plan and prepare for the next battle ahead.
Oh she's immortal too? 3 days as well? Can we drop pretense and just point out that you want to make Jesus? 3 Days is not a suitable reconstruction time for what is effectively immortality. Other comparable abilities either involve the person reverting to a weaker state of being and needing to re-earn what they formerly were or, in some cases, growing up all over again. This needs to be changed.
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Mon Jan 19, 2015 5:10 pm
Murphy's Law:
If anything is possible to happen, it can, and will. When Norah enters Bankai, she will not only be in the Zone, she will also have her Crystals activate something called Murphy's Law. From Murphy's Law, Norah will make 2 rules in which labels what is acceptable and what is not while within her Digital Field. They can either be what is entirely possible, or impossible, and she will rule it. When activated, they will happen, and nothing will stop them, unless they escape the zone. The Laws have to be Neutral, as well as specific in how they're initiated, otherwise the Digital Data Corruption Zone wont be able to understand the Rule. For example, Norah saying "She cannot be attacked" is too broad, and won't be recognized by the Zone. But if Norah states that she cannot be struck by hand to hand abilities, then the Rule would be understood. If the Rules become violated, then a disable is put into place where that knowledge on the said ability becomes forgotten by those who violated the rules, till they escape the Digital Data Corruption Zone. Once they leave the Zone, the forgotten ability/understanding will be remembered.
Connection of red string - Fate:
When Norah feels that she is going to lose and is beyond her control, she'll suddenly activate the Red String of Fate. If her opponent has been mind sapped during the fight, she will be capable of activating this ability. When done so, a red string will appear between her and her opponent. The string is invisible to the opponent, and can only be contacted/seen when the target has a higher willpower than Norah. The string will appear instantly and make contact as soon as Norah's eyes spot the target, so once seen, you're instantly under its influence. When the string is active, a connection is made between her opponent and herself, so that whatever damage is done to Norah is done back to her opponent. If Norah is cut, her opponent will be cut, and so forth. If Norah dies, so will her opponent. The only way to see the string is to overpower Norah's willpower. Once done, the string can be cut, but her opponent must first overpower Norah's willpower to see the string.
Ok, one more change is going to have to happen here with either this or Mind Sap. I need either a duration for the effects of Mind Sap on a person(at the moment I'm presuming it is until the end of the thread) or I need the Mind Sap that is used to activate this ability to be fresh, like within a post or two before this ability is used. Then I'm cool with it.
Digital Data Corruption Zone:
Digital Data Corruption is a giant area of effect that takes place around 1/2 mile from Norah's crystals, creating a battlefield. The Crystals create the outline of the battlefield, and prevent any outside influences affecting the battlefield. What Digital Data Corruption does is creates a digital battlefield that stops and negates powers from the outside, and contains all forms of data, process, thought, and creation from inside to it's source, Norah's Zanpaktou. Best way to think of this is, is your Zanpaktou creates something, then the Zanpaktou needs to make it, not the wielder, thus the Zanpaktou needs to create the power or force while the Wielder has no control over it, instead he only is capable of controlling his own strengths. This battlefield has different effects on allies, enemies, and Norah herself. The zone of course has a "Firewall" that Norah is able to label as Good and Bad within her Zone. This allows Allies to use their powers openly through Norah, and blocks out Enemies. The Firewall also has thousands of different Proxy's as if people try to use different codes or makeups to get through her Zone, Norah will read it instantly and have it blocked. Only way to escape it, is by running. Once the Zone disappears, everything that was created digitally, is removed.
The bold is still confusing and still kind of an issue, since it's implying something different than what we spoke about earlier.
Projection of Reality:
While in Digital Data Corruption Zone, Norah will make a projection of her targets willpower, based from the information of the mind stolen from her target. These targets will match the opponents tier, and will have a mindset of the target and their true intentions and identities, or will project what Norah wants them to project. They are meant to be mirror matches, and for the projection to break their target down through their mind while Norah fights them physically for sneak attacks. The Projection must stay within range of about 500 feet from any of Norah's Crystals to stay projected, for if it leaves it's zone, the projection will disappear and Norah will have to re-create it.
This needs further limited, with harsh limits put on how often she can "re-create" these images. For example's sake, copying Shadin is going to be incredibly difficult to destroy. If she can recreate it was naught but a thought afterward...well.
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:21 am
Application Checklist
- Name [X]
- Appropriate Age [X]
- Gender [X]
- Appearance Present [X]
- Appearance Described in Appropriate Length OR Picture is Visible [X]
- Appearance is Not Claimed [X]
- 10 sentences for personality [X]
- History is of appropriate length [X]
- Powers are not Godmod/Overpowered [X]
- Powers are described reasonably enough [X]
- Application/RP Sample is not in First Person [X]
- Skills are not filled in (Omit if a Hollow)[X]
- RP Sample Present (Omit if this is not the first character) [X]
- RP Sample is 10 sentences [X]
Will Skills
- Willpower/Determination: Master
- Mental Deduction: Master
- Pain Endurance: Adept
- Focus: Master
Comments/Notes: You know the drill, this is going to be watched for abuse but for the most part this is no longer obnoxiously overbearing.
Tier: 0-5++
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Wed Dec 23, 2015 2:25 am
✖| Kuma Shock! |✚
┣▇▇▇═─ ▸ ☠ ◂ ─═▇▇▇┥
InactiveCharacters Upon Inactivity!
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Re: Norah Bright, Wielder of the Will of God (Approved Shinigami 0-5++)
Sat Jan 30, 2016 4:44 pm
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